The Art of We

121. Addressing Passive-Aggressive Comments (Replay)


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About the Episode:

Addressing passive-aggressive comments like a ninja is highly satisfying. It can stop the aggressor in their shoes and wake them up to the impact they’re having. Most passive-aggressive comments are simply unskilled communications of negative feelings. By directly and neutrally addressing passive aggressiveness, we can support each other to grow as human beings. 

In episode 121 of the Art of We podcast, we get into the nuanced terrain of passive aggressiveness in both personal and professional relationships. Dr. Will and Krista Van Derveer discuss its subtle nature and how it can operate under a veneer of politeness, making it challenging to detect and address. They dive into the psychological underpinnings of why individuals resort to such behavior, highlighting the cultural lack of effective tools for expressing negative feelings directly.

The hosts share practical strategies, share personal anecdotes, and role-play scenarios to illustrate how to respond to passive aggression in a way that fosters understanding and growth rather than perpetuating a cycle of negativity. They advocate for an approach that involves acknowledging the impact of such comments, expressing one's feelings without aggression, and seeking to understand the underlying needs of the other person.


A must listen for:

  • Individuals in leadership positions who deal with other humans :)
  • Partners who have a hard time communicating their needs and wants skillfully 
  • People who have a family or community that has a habit of passive-aggressive behavior
  • Anyone who loves to grow!


Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or on your favorite podcast platform. 


Resources Mentioned: 

  • Our Top 10 Relationship Agreements 
  • Psychology Today


Get in Touch: 

  • The Art Of We Website
  • The Art of We Instagram 
  • Integrative Psychiatry Institute: Mental Wellness & Psychedelic Therapy Training


Rate, Review, & Follow on Apple Podcasts: 

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The Art of WeBy Krista Van Derveer and Dr. Will Van Derveer

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