Conflict Owner's Manual

126 Better than counting to 10: Five valuable ways to handle emotion in conflict


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Perhaps you've heard the advice to count to 10 when you're upset, before you respond. Good advice if you're the upset person. Not as useful if someone is upset with you. At the end of counting to 10, you've counted to 10. Then what? 
Yes, you do want to pause before you respond. But there's a better use of that pause than counting to 10.
Here are five conflict competent strategies to make that pause really helpful with how you respond.

show notes:

Episode 20: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0T4cD_KuP8M&t=74s

Viktor Frankl: “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.”

A helpful website about the seconds of pause between stimulus and response:

https://www.6seconds.org/2023/07/18/apply-consequential-thinking-in-the-six-seconds-eq-model/

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Dr. Deborah Sword is a conflict specialist with decades of experience and training to share.

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Conflict Owner's ManualBy Dr. Deborah Sword, with co-host Tyson Bankert