Its the magical time of year again: Time for me to release the next installment of the legendary FRIDAY THE 13th SPECTACULAR! We'll be covering the controversial ninth film in the series, JASON GOES TO HELL: The Final Friday.

And while I may spend more time obsessing about LESLIE JORDAN in SORDID LIVES, the mysterious gunk in my drain, a menacing tower of shellfish and my cats testicles, you'll be sure to learn things about JGTH that you never dreamed.

No, no...it still stinks, but I got some quips, insults and harsh barbs.

Harsh Barb sounds like a character I want to play someday.