We Live in a Goal-Oriented Society. 

 

Finish one race? Someone asks “When is your next one?” Have a good project launch? The media is already asking “What’s next for you?”

While consistently chasing higher goals is the way we grow, it can also lead to burnout and overwhelm. Eventually, we will hit a point where you’ll get tired of “chasing the higher income” goal or “hit the next fitness: milestone.

What do you do then?

Dan Holloway reached the point where he was tired of chasing the goal. After struggling and sacrificing, his business had become a success. He was making money he always wanted and living the life he could only dream about.

Yet, he wasn’t fulfilled. He wasn’t happy.

Fixing the Story: What Happens After the “Success Story”

 

A lot of us would like to have the problem Dan had. Sure, we’d all like to have the problem of having a big bank account, travelling around the world, and own a multi-figure business. We’d like to get the media attention, fame, and all the opportunities that come with it.

But, as Dan Holloway, no one is after that success story. No one is after that business hit that income goal or the magazine articles find the next “hot entrepreneur” to write about.

No one is there when we reach the peak.

We tell ourselves that things will get better once we reach “after”. No one is there to tell us what to do once we reach a goal, yet the way we deal with one success is critical to the future.

 

Reframing the Story: The Cinderella Story Behind Success

 

There is a story that is painted about success. You might call it the “Cinderella Success Syndrome”. In that story, everything is permanently beautiful “after” the sacrifice.

Once we land that big-name client, things will be easy. Once we get that promotion, it will be easier to get the money. Once we get more sales, we won’t have to fight as hard.

These stories we tell ourselves are what drive us to work late nights and early mornings, to stay on the job when no one else is there.

The truth is, success is not a destination. It is a stopping point in our journey.

Throughout your life, you will have experiences that you (or others) call “success” or “failures.” These are moments, they are not destinations.

Yet, our brains hold onto these moments as “destinations”.

When these “destinations” are gone, we have to deal with the next moment.

 

Unravelling the “Perfect’ Success Story: Why Success Isn’t What We Think It is

 

In the chase of success as a “destination”, we lose sight of the fact that success is a moment we prepare for. We aren’t given success, we become successful. We earn it. We become it.

This is why most lottery winners go broke in less than 7 years. They don’t develop the management skills to manage that massive windfall of cash. It’s also why most one-hit-wonder unicorn startups have trouble inventing their next big product.

Why is that so important?

The stories we believe about success impact what we do with it. If we think success is just a “moment”, we will miss the point. We won’t appreciate the journey getting to the successful moment. We won’t focus on the big “WHY”. We won’t become a success.

Ignoring the journey or our “big WHY” is a recipe for burnout. If we don’t pursue success as a journey, we will treat it as a sprint, exhausting our body and mind to get to the finish line. If we don’t understand our “big WHY” we will wonder why we are working so hard in the first place.

 

A Better Approach: Chase Fulfillment You Will Create Success No Matter What

 

So what’s the takeaway here? It’s not to reject success or the gifts it brings,