Shades of Pleasure Podcast

15 - Differentiation as the Path to Personal and Relational Freedom - Shades of Pleasure Podcast


Listen Later

October 10, 2025

Welcome to Season 2, Episode 5, Shades of Pleasure

Four sexologists open up about life, love, and the pursuit of consensual non monogamy.

The crew — Mou, Melissa, Wayne, and Kelly — dive into the complex role of differentiation in relationships, exploring what it means to stay connected while remaining your own person. They unpack why developing autonomy and expanding into nonmonogamy can feel so challenging within a culture steeped in monogamous conditioning and codependent relational norms.

The conversation also highlights the somatic impact of relational change, acknowledging how shifts in attachment, intimacy, and openness can register in the body. They discuss the importance of preparing the body to find safety and regulation, and introduce the concept of titration- taking slow, measured steps so the nervous system has time to catch up with new relational experiences. From a somatic lens, they examine the role of couple privilege, the need for frontloading and transparency with other partners, and the value of slowing down to honor everyone’s pace.

Ultimately, they remind us that expanding a relationship isn’t just a mental or emotional process but a deeply embodied one, and that cultivating self- and co-regulation in the midst of change can transform fear into freedom, and disruption into deeper connection.



Get full access to Shades of Pleasure Podcast at shadesofpleasure.substack.com/subscribe

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit pleasureforthemasses.substack.com
...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Shades of Pleasure PodcastBy Shades of Pleasure Hosts Mou, Melissa, Kelly, Wayne