Will & Luke Discuss

#18 Nonviolent Communication (Marshall Rosenberg)


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This episode we cover one of Luke's favourite concepts around communication, Marshall Rosenberg's 'Non-Violent Communication'. We discuss the ideas of communicating with other's from a place of 'feelings' and 'needs' as a way of connecting with others, based on the principle that our feelings are indications of met (or unmet) needs and that the best communication is when we are voluntarily contributing to others' well being. This is opposed to language which moves us away from people such as labelling or casting judgement. We discuss ways to better communicate in conflict and when making requests. Also how to express empathy and really being able to connect deeper with other people when we converse with them. We also discuss developing language of gratitude in particular to giving specific feedback to others.  Plenty covered in this one and lots of takeaways.   

Hope you enjoy 

Will & Luke

  • 00:00 Introductions and key concepts 
  • 4:45 About Marshall Rosenberg 
  • 8:20 Connecting with other people's feelings and needs during communication  
  • 9:40 Language to move away from the other (jackal language) (casting judgement, labelling) 
  • 14:40 Non 'violent' communication 
  • 18:00 Yes-saying jackals 
  • 23:15 Choice and it's relationship to communication (Denying responsibility) 
  • 25:35 Communication in conflict (noticing when we are responding to inner sense of anger, guilt, depression and shame - distortion of needs) (Concrete observation without judgement, feeling, need and request - not demand) (Speaking in giraffe) 
  • 34:15 Requests and saying no. Also finding our own language 
  • 40:55 Communicating with empathy (being present. not giving advice and not saying you understand) 
  • 46:32 Examples of a conflict we've had and seeing it through a Non-Violent communication framework 
  • 1:02:15 Use of communication to celebrate life and express gratitude (not just for conflict resolution) 
  • 1:07:40 Non-verbal communication 
  • 1:09:45 Final reflections  
  • Purchase the book at: https://www.nonviolentcommunication.com/

    This specific episode can also be seen on: https://youtu.be/i7H8Tq7PV7E

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