Note: This is a rebroadcast.

It’s a tough job to manage a household. Things need to be regularly fixed, maintained, and cleaned. How do you stay on top of these tasks in order to keep your home in tip-top shape?

My guest knows his way all around this issue and has some field-tested, insider advice to offer. Charles MacPherson spent two decades as the major-domo or chief butler of a grand household. He’s also the founder of North America’s only registered school for butlers and household managers and the author of several books drawn from his butlering experience, including The Butler Speaks: A Return to Proper Etiquette, Stylish Entertaining, and the Art of Good Housekeeping.

In the first part of our conversation, Charles charts the history of domestic service and describes why the practice of having servants like a butler and maid ebbed in the mid-20th century but has made a comeback today. We then turn to what average folks who don’t have a household staff can do to better manage their homes. Charles recommends keeping something called a “butler’s book” to stay on top of household schedules and maintenance checklists. We then discuss how to clean your home more logically and efficiently. Charles shares his golden rules of house cleaning, the cleaning task you’ve probably neglected (hint: go take a look at the side of the door on your dishwasher), his surprising choice for the best product to use to clean your shower, how often you should change your bedsheets, and much more.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• AoM Article: How to Establish a Simple Cleaning Routine and Stick to It
• AoM Article: How to Clean Your Entire House in 30 Minutes
• AoM Article: How to Clean Like a Man
• AoM Article: Keep Your House in Tip-Top Shape — An Incredibly Handy Home Maintenance Checklist
• AoM Article The Butler’s Book: How to Create the Instruction Manual For Your Home
• AoM Article: Towards a Philosophy of Household Management
• The Book of Household Management by Isabella Beeton

Connect With Charles MacPherson

• Charles’ website

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When people think of J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis, they often picture tweedy Oxford professors and beloved fantasy authors. But their writing wasn't drawn only from their bucolic days teaching at Oxford and walking in the English countryside; it had a darker, deeper backdrop: the trenches of World War I and the cataclysm of World War II. Lewis and Tolkien weren't just fantasy writers — they were war veterans, cultural critics, and men with firsthand knowledge of evil, heroism, and sacrifice.

In today’s episode, I’m joined by Joseph Loconte, returning to the show to discuss his latest book, The War for Middle Earth. We explore how both world wars shaped the perspectives of Tolkien and Lewis, found their way into works like The Lord of the Rings and The Chronicles of Narnia, and infused their literary masterpieces with moral weight, spiritual depth, and timeless themes of resistance, friendship, and redemption. We also talk about the legendary friendship between Tolkien and Lewis, the creation of the Inklings, and how the men demonstrated the countercultural power of imaginative storytelling.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• Related AoM podcasts:
• #178: The Inklings Mastermind Group
• #272: Lewis, Tolkien, and the Myth of Progress (Loconte’s first appearance on the AoM podcast)
• #430: Why You Need to Join the Great Conversation About the Great Books
• #499: A Fascinating Primer on Norse Mythology 
• #594: How Churchill (and London) Survived the Blitz of 1940
• #723: Men Without Chests
• #765: C.S. Lewis on Building Men With Chests
• #951: The Hobbit Virtues
• Related AoM articles
• The Power of Conversation: A Lesson from CS Lewis and JRR Tolkien 
• Lessons in Manliness from Viking Mythology 
• Lessons in Manliness: The Hobbit
• Men Without Chests
• “Blood, Sweat, and Tears” speech by Winston Churchill
• 4 Classic Chapter Books to Read Aloud With Your Kids
• Related outside articles:
• Tolkien’s Deadly Dragons 
• Munich Agreement
• Owen Barfield
• Tolkien books mentioned:
• The Letters of J.R.R. Tolkien 
• Beowulf translated by Tolkien
• The Hobbit 
• The Lord of the Rings 
• Beren and Luthien 
• Letters from Father Christmas 
• Lewis books mentioned:
• The Letters of C.S. Lewis 
• The Collected Poems of C.S. Lewis 
• The Pilgrim’s Regress
• The Chronicles of Narnia
• The Great Divorce
• The Screwtape Letters 
• The Space Trilogy 
• The Four Loves
• Mere Christianity 
• The Reading Life 
• Related books by other authors:
• Tolkien and the Great War by John Garth
• The Somme by Martin Gilbert
• The Guns of August by Barbara Tuchman
• The Future of an Illusion by Sigmund Freud
• The Aeneid by Virgil
• Phantastes by George MacDonald
• The Vinland Sagas
• The Iliad and The Odyssey by Homer
• The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri
• Le Morte d’Arthur by Thomas Malory

Connect With Joseph Loconte

• Joseph's website

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

When we think about what shaped our life trajectory, we often focus on the way our parents raised us. But what about our siblings? What role do they play in who we become?

My guest today makes the case that siblings may be just as influential as parents in impacting how we turn out.

Her name is Susan Dominus, and she’s a journalist and the author of The Family Dynamic: A Journey into the Mystery of Sibling Success. Susan and I start our conversation by unpacking the broader question of what drives human development more — nature or nurture. We then dig into how siblings shape us, from the impact of birth order to how rivalry can raise our ambitions and alter our life paths. Along the way, we also explore the influence parents do have on their kids — and why it may not be as strong as we often think.

Connect With Susan Dominus

• Susan's website
• Susan's faculty page
• Susan at the NYT

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

In a story from ancient Greek philosophy, Hercules faces a choice between two paths: one promising pleasure and ease; the other, hardship and struggle — but also growth and greatness. According to today’s guest, this ancient parable is more relevant than ever.

Dr. Paul Taylor, a psychophysiologist and the author of the new book The Hardiness Effect, returns to the show to argue that comfort has become our default mode — and it’s making us mentally and physically sick. To reclaim health and meaning, we must actively choose the path of arete — a life of effort, engagement, and challenge.

Paul first outlines the four traits that define a psychologically hardy person and how we grow by embracing and even relishing discomfort. We then dive into the physiological side of hardiness. We discuss how intentionally seeking stressors can strengthen both body and mind and some of the practices and protocols that lead to optimal health. We end our conversation with what tackling heroic, Herculean labors looks like today.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• Paul's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #941 — How to Avoid Death by Comfort
• AoM Podcast #1,087: Why You Need the Good Stress of Socializing
• AoM Podcast #793: The New Science of Metabolism and Weight Loss with Herman Pontzer
• The Choice of Hercules 
• AoM podcast on the benefits of sunlight
• "Don't Die: Eat More Small Fish" by Michael Easter
• AoM Article: Nature’s Prescription — The 20-5-3 Rule for Spending Time Outdoors
• Norwegian 4X4 HIIT Protocol
• AoM article on Zone 2 Cardio
• Omega-3 testing

Connect With Paul Taylor

• Paul's website

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We live in a culture that does everything it can to keep death at a distance. We hide it behind hospital curtains, euphemize it in conversation, and hustle through grief like it's just another item on the to-do list. We don't want death to get in the way of living.

But my guest would say that making friends with death is the key to fully embracing life. Joanna Ebenstein is the founder of Morbid Anatomy, a project that uses exhibitions, lectures, and classes to explore how death intersects with history and culture. She's also the author of Memento Mori: The Art of Contemplating Death to Live a Better Life. Today on the show, Joanna shares why we lost a more intimate relationship with death and the life-stifling consequences of that disconnect. We discuss practices for coming to terms with death and removing our fear of it, including looking at memento mori art, meditating on death, talking to the dead, and simply taking care of the practicalities surrounding our inevitable departure.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• AoM Article: What Man Understands That He Is Dying Daily? (This Is Your Life)
• AoM Article: Memento Mori — Art to Help You Meditate on Death and Become a Better Man
• AoM Article: A Primer on Advance Directives
• AoM Article: How To Protect Your Legacy — A 3-Step Guide to Estate Planning
• Sunday Firesides: Look Into the Tomb
• Sunday Firesides: As I Am Now
• Victorian Memorial Hairwork
• The Dance of Death
• Vanitas art
• The Smell of Rain on Dust: Grief and Praise by Martín Prechtel
• Sleeping Beauty: Memorial Photography in America by Stanley B. Burns
• Death: A Graveside Companion by Joanna Ebenstein

Connect With Joanna Ebenstein

• Morbid Anatomy website
• Joanna's website

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you went to high school in America, you probably read Moby-Dick — or, more likely, you skimmed the CliffsNotes and wondered why this dense, whale-obsessed novel was considered a classic.

That was me in 10th grade.

But earlier this year, I decided to revisit Moby-Dick in midlife, and it hit me completely differently. What once seemed like a tedious story about a guy chasing a whale revealed itself to be a profound meditation on free will, perception, self-reliance, leadership, and obsession. It’s now one of my favorite novels.

To help unpack why Moby-Dick endures — and why it might be worth picking up again— I’m joined by Mark Cirino, a professor of American literature. Today on the show, we discuss why Moby-Dick was initially overlooked, the novel’s major themes, and the timeless mystery of Captain Ahab’s monomaniacal quest.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• Mark's previous appearances on the AoM podcast:
• Episode #786: The Writing Life of Ernest Hemingway
• Episode #922: For Whom the Bell Tolls
• One True Podcast
• The Norton Library Podcast
• Mark's Norton Library Edition of A Farewell to Arms

Connect With Mark Cirino

• Mark’s faculty page

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

There's been a lot of talk about morning routines in the last few years. But the idea is hardly new; famous men from Thomas Aquinas to Benjamin Franklin structured their mornings to accomplish great deeds and live flourishing lives.

A modern advocate of this age-old practice is Hal Elrod, author of The Miracle Morning, first published nearly twenty years ago. Long before morning routines became a trend, Hal was experimenting with his own — researching and refining what actually works. Through his experiences and those of the millions who’ve tried his approach, he’s cut through the aspirational noise to offer a doable, effective framework for starting your day right. Today on the show, Hal shares the six practices of the Miracle Morning routine, why he chose them, and how they set up your day for success. We also discuss how long the routine takes and how a shortened version can be done in just six minutes, as well as how to make it work if you're not a morning person. Along the way, I share what my own morning routine looks like.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• The Stockdale Paradox
• AoM Article: Bookend Your Day — The Power of Morning and Evening Routines
• AoM Article: How to Hardwire Your Happiness

Connect With Hal Elrod

• Hal's website
• Hal on IG
• Hal on FB
• Hal on X
• Hal on LinkedIn

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What does it mean to be a man? It’s a timeless question that's been answered in different ways across the ages. For the ancient Romans, the word for manliness was virtus — the root of our word virtue. To be a man meant living a life of virtuous excellence.

Waller Newell takes up that same definition in his book The Code of Man, first published twenty years ago and now released in a new edition. Today on the show, Waller, a professor of political science, argues that we need to recover an older vision of manhood rooted in the traditions of Western antiquity. He shares the five paths that, in his view, form the classical code of manliness and how they can continue to be lived out today.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• Waller's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #104 — The Code of Man With Waller Newell
• AoM Article: What Is Manliness?
• AoM series on the origins and nature of manhood
• AoM Podcast #1,028: The 5 Marks of a Man
• AoM Podcast #926: The 5 Shifts of Manhood
• AoM Article: Got Thumos?
• AoM Article: What Is a Man? The Allegory of the Chariot
• AoM Podcast #871: Jane Austen for Dudes
• Sunday Firesides: Climb the Ladder of Love

Connect With Waller Newell

• Waller's website
• Waller's faculty page

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You may have heard of hormesis — the idea that intentionally embracing small stressors activates the body’s repair and defense systems, building resilience, improving how the body and even the microbiome function, and ultimately protecting against the harms of chronic stress.

We typically think of these hormetic stressors in terms of things like exercising, taking ice baths, sitting in a sauna, and ingesting certain plant compounds. But you ought to consider adding socializing to that list.

As my guest today explains, while we tend to avoid socializing as we do all stressors — even the good ones — it's something that can strengthen our health, resilience, immunity, and sense of meaning. Jeffrey Hall, professor of communication studies and co-author of The Social Biome: How Everyday Communication Connects and Shapes Us, joins me to discuss why relationships are harder to build in the modern world, how our adolescent approach to making friends needs to evolve, and why we must intentionally “exercise” our social muscles in a world where they'll otherwise atrophy.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• Jeffrey's previous appearance on the AoM podcast: Episode #772 — How Long Does It Take to Make Friends (And How Does That Process Work, Anyway)?
• AoM Article: 3 Things No One Ever Told You About Making Friends in Adulthood
• AoM Article: The Importance of Developing and Maintaining Your Social Fitness
• AoM Podcast #863: Key Insights From the Longest Study on Happiness
• AoM Article: Love Is All You Need — Insights from the Longest Longitudinal Study on Men Ever Conducted

Connect With Jeffrey Hall

• KU’s Relationships and Technology Lab
• Jeffrey's faculty page
• Jeffrey on LinkedIn
• Jeffrey on IG

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Whether you’ve never stepped foot in a weight room or you’ve been lifting for years without seeing significant results, figuring out how to get big, strong, and jacked can feel overwhelming. There are endless programs, conflicting opinions, and a lot of noise about what actually works.

Today on the show, Paul Horn offers a grounded, field-tested take on what really helps average guys get stronger and more muscular — without burning out. Paul is a strength coach and the author of Radically Simple Strength and Radically Simple Muscle. We discuss why you need to get strong before you get shredded, how and why Paul modified the classic Starting Strength program, the strength benchmarks men should be able to hit, when to shift from powerlifting to bodybuilding-style training, why you should train your lower body like a powerlifter and your upper body like a bodybuilder, the physique signal that shows you're in shape, the body fat percentage every man should get down to at least once in his life, and more.

Resources Related to the Podcast

• AoM Podcast #154: Strength Training for Everyone
• AoM Podcast #302: My Workout Routine & The Benefits of a Strength Coach
• AoM Podcast #826: From Novice to Advanced — The Weightlifter’s Journey
• AoM Article: The Re-Rise of the Machines
• AoM Article: Getting Ripped vs. Getting Strong
• Paul's video on how to stretch your shoulders for the low-bar back squat
• Starting Strength by Mark Rippetoe
• AoM barbell training videos with Mark Rippetoe

Connect With Paul Horn

• Paul's website

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.