Resentment-Free Relationships

199. Understanding the Four Horsemen of Conflict


Listen Later

This episode features insights from John and Julie Gottman's research on conflict in marriage, advocating for healthy disagreement as a key component of intimacy and trust in relationships. Host Becky debunks myths about conflict-free marriages, introduces the concept of 'soft startup' for resolving disagreements, and discusses how to avoid the 'four horsemen of the apocalypse' (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, stonewalling) for better communication.

00:00 Welcome to the Healthy Conflict Series

00:11 The Importance of Healthy Conflict in Marriage

00:45 Learning from the Gottmans: Embracing Conflict for Intimacy

03:30 Understanding Your Conflict Culture

04:08 The Gottmans' Five Steps to Resolving Conflict

05:19 Identifying and Overcoming the Four Horsemen

10:01 Self-Reflection and Improvement Exercise

14:09 Practicing Healthy Conflict Responses

15:30 Homework and Preview for Next Week

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Resentment-Free RelationshipsBy Becky Smith

  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5
  • 5

5

39 ratings