What helps kids feel safe, motivated, proud, and ready to try hard things?

In this episode of Parents of the Year, Andrew and Caroline sit down with Matt Kaufman—camp director, author of The Campfire Effect, and lifelong summer camp leader—to talk about what camp gets so right about child development, belonging, and confidence.

Matt breaks down five brain chemicals that shape how kids grow: oxytocin, dopamine, cortisol, serotonin, and endorphins. Andrew and Caroline explore how emotional safety comes first, why kids need meaningful goals, how managed stress helps them grow, and why joy and play matter far more than many families realize.

You’ll hear practical ideas parents can use right away at home: simple rituals that build connection, better ways to praise kids, how to help children stretch outside their comfort zone, and why screens can make motivation and problem-solving harder for both kids and adults.

This is a warm, funny, useful conversation about raising children who feel like they belong—and who believe they can do hard things.

In this episode:

• How emotional safety shapes learning, confidence, and connection
• Why rituals help calm the nervous system
• The difference between shallow dopamine and earned dopamine
• How to support kids through stress without removing every challenge
• Why kids need many paths to feel capable and valued
• How play, laughter, movement, and silliness refill the tank
• What parents can borrow from camp, even without a cabin, campfire, or ropes course

Perfect for parents of kids and teens who want to build resilience, belonging, motivation, and stronger family connection.

About Matt Kaufman
Matt Kaufman has spent most of his life at summer camp, but not because he lacked options. In school, things came easily. He moved quickly through classes and eventually graduated from Cornell University with both a bachelor’s and a master’s degree in Operations Research and Industrial Engineering, finishing his master’s program as valedictorian. Camp was different. He was the quiet kid who had to push himself to talk to people, try things that felt uncomfortable, and work through everyday conflicts in a place where no one cared about grades. That early contrast—school rewarding his mind and camp reshaping his whole self—never left him.

Connect with Matt:
Website: https://www.ilove.camp/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/matthewjkaufman/

Homework activities for adults to support children and teens, plus resources needed

1. Create one family ritual this week

Pick one small moment you can repeat every day: a bedtime phrase, a goodbye hand squeeze, a six-second hug, or a check-in question at dinner.

Purpose: build safety and connection
Resources needed: none, or a sticky note reminder on the fridge

2. Practise “describe, label, praise”

Catch your child doing something well and respond like this:
 “You put your dish in the sink. That’s being helpful. Great job.”

Purpose: make praise specific so it actually sticks

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