Mothering Ourselves Mindfully

50. There’s No Magic Planner for the Mental Load You’re Carrying


Listen Later

In this episode, we dive deep into why there's no magical planner that will solve the mental load you're carrying as a mother. If you've ever found yourself chasing the "perfect" planning system (like me), thinking it will finally crack the code on managing it all, this episode is for you. We explore the real reasons behind mental load overwhelm and why the solution isn't found in better organization - it's found in understanding what's happening beneath the surface.

Key Points

  • The three types of mental load: managerial (planning, organizing), cognitive (anticipating, decision-making), and emotional (worry, concern, tending to emotional needs)
  • Why cognitive and managerial load actually have positive associations with family satisfaction and empowerment
  • How emotional load creates the most negative impact and leads to exhaustion
  • The trap of believing better planning will solve deeper issues around worthiness and productivity
  • Understanding your capacity limits - you're not a machine that can just "upgrade" to handle more
  • How childhood models and cultural messages program us to equate productivity with worth
  • The nervous system's role in driving perfectionism and hyper-vigilance around doing
  • Why awareness of your programming is the first step toward change
  • Learning to recognize when you're operating from "should" versus authentic choice

Quotes

"There is no planner that is going to ultimately alleviate a relationship to doing and achieving that exists for so many of us."

"You can only juggle so many balls... there's only so long you can hold that stuff up."

"You are actually worthy as you are. Subtract all the doing. You are worthy as you are."

"My productivity is a badge of honor. Proves that I'm good... because my output and how much I can hold is connected to the praise that I get."

Resources Mentioned

  • Kelly McGonigal's research on stress mindset: https://www.dailygood.org/story/3107/how-to-make-stress-your-friend-kelly-mcgonigal/ 
  • Upcoming Nourish retreat for deeper nervous system work: https://theschoolofmom.com/nourish
  • Mental Load Research study: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37359080/ 
  • Quiz: http://www.theschoolofmom.com/quiz 
  • Waitlist for The School of MOM: https://theschoolofmom.com/waitlist 

What's Coming Next

Continue exploring how to break free from productivity loops and develop a healthier relationship with rest, boundaries, and your inherent worth beyond what you accomplish.

Thank you for tuning in to this episode of "Mothering Ourselves Mindfully." We look forward to sharing more insights and inspiration in the upcoming episodes!


www.theschoolofmom.com

Instagram @the.schoolofmom

Book a breakthrough Call

...more
View all episodesView all episodes
Download on the App Store

Mothering Ourselves MindfullyBy Sarah Harmon