This week we tackle a couple of episodes of Ultra Q. First John and Eugene contemplate the unique bond between man and his giant monkey – or perhaps we contemplate the bond between giant monkey and his pet man? Then they look at the very real implications of space exploration. What if mankind shot an arrow into the air… and someone shot it right back at us?

Welcome to our discussion of the Ultra Q episodes, Goro and Goro and A Present from Mars.

There’s trouble at the Awashima Ropeway when a giant monkey starts monkeying around with the cables.

Two science researchers living nearby in the mountains discover that their lab stores have been broken into. At first they blame Goro, the mute boy who does groundskeeping for them, but soon they realize the break-in was by monkeys and chemicals probably eaten. This concerns them.

Goro runs off and meets up with the giant monkey, whose name is also Goro.

Jun and Ippei, at the airline, are reading a letter from Yuriko. She’s on an assignment on a South Seas island, searching for missing Japanese WWII soldiers. Yuriko’s Editor-in-Chief arrives, and has Jun and Ippei fly him out to the island, where they get pictures of Goro, who they think may be harming Goro, who he is holding in his hand.

Fear not, say the convenient scientists. Goro is like a foster parent for Goro. They’re really simpatico.

The Editor-in-Chief turns in a terrific, heartwarming story about Goro and Goro, along with the only pictures of Goro.

Yuriko’s expedition returns and she heads straight to Jun and Ippei instead of reporting for work. It’s there that she learns of the giant monkey and mentions, in passing, that the South Seas island she was on had their own giant monkey. She’s sent to do more research on Goro.

When they arrive, the villagers are beating up Goro. He’s been stealing food and they’re none-too-happy about it. Jun and the others stop the mob from killing him, but the police come and take him away.

Soon Goro is destroying the town. Goro has been stealing food from the village to feed Goro, who is apparently too stupid to feed himself. Now he’s wandered into town in search of a handout, and when the police start shooting him in the butt, things get ugly. Butt Ugly, you might say.

The military want to destroy Goro. Yuriko wants to take him to the island where he can be with the other giant monkey. The Editor-in-Chief agrees to this idea, and gets Goro out of jail so that he can, unwittingly drug Goro with medicated milk. The Editor-in-Chief also agrees to foot the bill to send Goro away.

As Goro sleeps, Goro screams in anguish.

It’s a slow news and Jun is taking Yuriko for some photos of Mt. Mihara. While flying in the area, the slow news day turns hot as a space probe plunges into the ocean near them.

The craft is a Mars probe that was launched at, and lost on Mars, six months ago. The only conclusion possible: Martians have returned the craft to us. Scientific analysis of the craft bears out this hypothesis. The parachute is made of an unknown material, and while the probes camera did take pictures, nothing on them is intelligible. Inside the probe are two golden orbs, about the size of quail eggs.

Isn’t that sweet? The Martians have sent us a gesture of congratulations, friendship and goodwill!

But just in case it isn’t, lets keep these golden egg-like things to ourselves and lock them up somewhere safe.

Somewhere safe happens to be in a safe, hidden behind large piles of cash. Cash which, unfortunately, happens to be the target of a bank robber. Well, technically, I guess he’s not a bank robber, he’s a scientific institute robber, because everyone knows, scientific research facilities literally have stacks of cash sitting around. He’s after the cash, but a couple gold balls looks good to him, too.

The bandit goes to charter a flight, at what just happens to be Jun’s airline. Jun puts up a fight but ultimately loses and is forced to fly the bandit to an island. During the struggle, one of the gold balls falls out on the floor.

That night, on the island, in a volcanic cave, the other golden ball falls out of the bandit’s pocket and rolls into the hot springs. It grows and hatches a terrifying slug monster, which kills the bandit and his partner immediately.

Back at the airline, Ippei has found the golden ball and, not knowing what it is, makes a necklace from it and presents it to Yuriko. Time has passed since the bandit shanghaied Jun and now there are reports of a monster on the island. Yuriko volunteers to cover the story. They find the dead bandits, the money and the giant slug monster. It pursues them around the island until it falls into the ocean, where it dissolves.

After the events, the gang are consulting with their sometimes acting scientific advisor, and they contemplate why Martians might have sent the monster to Earth. Was it a warning? A challenge? Do they feel threatened by mankind’s exploration of the space? Are there perhaps universal laws that we are unaware of that we have transgressed?

These questions must wait for Yuriko’s necklace has gotten warm enough to hatch. Our story ends with a giant slug roaming the grounds of the scientist’s home.