What It's Like To Be You

#60: Alex (SO/SP 6w7 693): Changing Inherited Reality Perspectives, Having “Mental Real Estate”, and the Exhaustion of Being One’s Own Vetting System


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Alex (SO/SP 6w7 693) joins us for a deep dive into the often-misunderstood inner terrain of the Social Six — where loyalty is a vigilant scan for danger, and the mind’s ceaseless activity is less about worry than about building a livable world. From the outset, Alex speaks to the dissonance of being typed as a Six, resisting the caricatures and one-dimensional projections that cling to the type. 

We explore the deep patterns of fear and mental over-responsibility that began in childhood: a sense of being a small, visible target in a world ruled by unseen authority. Alex opens up about health anxiety, asexuality, and the complexity of labels — both how they can offer coherence and how they can confine. 

Alex also brings in the character of Zuko from our shared favorite show Avatar: The Last Airbender as a mirror of his own journey — from rigid loyalty to false authority, through crisis, to a reclamation of inner truth. Together, we explore how Six navigates the labyrinth of mental gates that must be opened before love can be received, and how trust — in the self, in others, in life — is painstakingly built, tested, and sometimes, finally, allowed.

LINKS


Learn at The Enneagram School

https://theenneagramschool.com/


Intro Course

https://www.theenneagramschool.com/intro-enneagram-course


Get Typed

https://www.enneagrammer.com/


Sinsomnia Podcast (Dreams)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/sinsomnia/id1684154994


House of Enneagram

https://www.youtube.com/@houseofenneagram 



TIMESTAMPS


00:00 - Intro


02:31 - Participating in Enneagram communities, creating memes while waiting for typing results, reacting to being type 6, unpacking the projections onto 6, "finding a mental home"


12:27 - Being a 'cog in the machine', erasing individualization, a "thought-terminating cliche", having mental tweezers 


17:10 - Childhood memories, fearing authority larger than parents, fear/anxiety of being a "sitting duck" to external powers


23:36 - "Going haywire", the vetting mechanism of 6, fearing and joking about death


29:01 - Ketamine treatment, expanding perspectives assisting with anxiety, limited "mental real estate", social narratives and afterthoughts, an unreliable narrator


38:09 - 6s not taking responsibility for personal perspectives, pinging off of others, judgment off of 'needing others', self-honoring and life-giving, self-sufficiency narratives


46:03 - 6s archetypal connection to labels, being asexual, attention to collective ideals/gaze


52:30 - self-deprecation being limiting, therapy, social rejection, deconstructing 'what I deserve to have/want", identifying the super-ego


59:11 - not making progress, fear of social vulnerability, 6's inner splitting, exploring the underdog position


01:06:59 - Avatar the Last Airbender; relating to the Zuko character arch, shedding the false authorities, enacting personal will, changing inherited reality perspectives


01:16:22 - 'vetting' self-love, matrix of mental gates, a core need to have 'right' orientation, observing the other center's participation


01:23:54 - Outro


CREDITS

Interview by Josh Lavine 

Edited by Kristen Oberly 

Music by Coma-Media from Pixabay 

Coma-Media: https://pixabay.com/users/coma-media-24399569/ 

Pixabay: https://pixabay.com/ 


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#enneagram #enneagramtypes #enneagram6

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What It's Like To Be YouBy Josh Lavine

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