Simon and Eugene discuss their previous encounters with this missing story, pure historicals and historical accuracy, and the editorial decisions around reconstructing a story where there is insufficient original material to convey the narrative.

Foreword

You’ll often hear that the world you create in the mind’s eye when listening to audio adventures is in every way superior to what can be created on TV or in movies.  I find that argument wanting.  That said, that is mostly what we have here in these reconstructions where two episodes are telesnaps.  Later I found out that William Russell had a separate narrative track explaining some of the more obscure bits, but by this time, I’d already written my summary – and I’m sticking to it.  Enjoy my mind’s eye.

Serial Synopsis

The TARDIS arrives near Jaffa in the 12th century.  Nearby is King Richard the Lionheart and his party of men named William.  They all come under attack by the Saracens under the command of Emir El Akir.  Barbara is captured, and Sir William Des Preaux is captured, pretending to be the King as a diversion to allow the real king to escape.

The Doctor, Vickie, and Ian recover the wounded Sir William De Tornebu, giving him medical attention and eventually returning him and the King’s belt, which was in Sir William’s possession, back to the King in Jaffa.  Before meeting the King, they must steal some clothes, which the Doctor and Vickie accomplish.  These clothes, however, are no doubt already stolen from the Crusaders.  Hopefully, that won’t cause any problems.

In El Akir’s camp, Sir William meets Barbara. After proper introductions, Sir William maintains his ruse, and he adds cover for Barbara by claiming she is his sister, Joanna, and they claim the treatment to which they are entitled as royalty.  El Akir makes to take them to Ramlah, where Saladin, the Sultan, has his camp, to gain his favor.

Saladin isn’t deceived and knows immediately this is neither King Richard nor Princess Joanna, and El Akir looks a fool.  Sir William is sent back to El Akir’s, but, as a knight, he is to be well treated in his captivity.  Barbara will remain to entertain Saladin with tales of her travels.

In King Richard’s court, he is beholden to the Doctor and fam but not inclined to help Barbara. Sir William and the Doctor make the King see the humor of Sir William’s ruse.

The Doctor is a wily old bird and soon has the King thinking of a swap and perhaps something more.

The King’s sister, Joanna, meets the Doctor, Vickie, and Ian, and she is suspicious of them.  Especially of Vickie, who is pretending to be Victor, a boy.

El Akir wants to do terrible things to Barbara, so he arranges for her to be kidnapped from Saladin’s encampment and taken to his place in Lydda to suffer her fate.

The King has decided to offer his sister in marriage to Saladin’s brother, Saphadin, to make a peace deal, and he sends Ian to convey the message, but first, he knights him, Sir Ian of Jaffa.

The stolen clothes have come back to haunt the Doctor as the Chamberlain recognizes them, but a 12th-century human brain is no match for a Time Lord brain, and the Doctor soon has this smoothed over to his satisfaction, if not everyone else’s.

Barbara arrives at Lydda, and then some noises happen. There are pictures of guards, apparently molesting a chicken, Barbara wandering the streets, and dramatic music, so I think she escaped.

Sir Ian arrives at Saladin’s camp and presents the King’s proposal.  They aren’t going to let Sir William go, and he learns of Barbara’s kidnapping, so Saladin allows him to go after her.

Yes, Barbara did escape, and as she is about to be recaptured, Haroun Ed-Din rescues her and gives her shelter in his home. 

Joanna discovers that Victor is a girl and, while upset, accepts that the Doctor only perpetrated the deception for the girl’s protection.  She takes Vickie into her protection.  In return, she suspects that her brother is up to something involving herself and asks the Doctor to tell her if he learns anything.  He agrees.

Haroun tells Barbara his tale: His eldest daughter was taken by El Akir for his harem, and Ek Akir murdered his son and wife.  For this, Haroun lives only to kill El Akir.  He has not told his other daughter, Safiya, about the fate of their family, and she believes they have gone missing.  Haroun goes out but is captured or maybe beaten and left in the street by the guards searching for Barbara.  This ultimately leads them to search Haroun’s house, and Barbara surrenders to them to protect Safiya.

Saladin has received Richard’s peace offer and agrees to it, but still makes ready his armies, just in case it falls through or is a deception.

While sleeping in the desert, Sir Ian is taken prisoner by Ibrahim and his mostly-missing brother.

In court, the Doctor is not making friends with the Earl of Leicester, who wants war, not peace. When asked directly by Joanna what the King has planned for her, the Doctor demures, so Leicester tells her, and she is furious at both the Doctor and the King, and she flatly refuses, citing that the Pope is ultimately in charge, not the King, and he wouldn’t allow it.

The King thinks the Doctor spilled the beans to Joanna and kicks him out.

Now trapped in El Akir’s palace, Barbara is going to be treated very poorly indeed by El Akir, but she escapes again, this time into the palace.

Sir Ian is tied up and staked to the ground.  His captor, Ibrahim, wants him to hand over his money, and when Sir Ian refuses, he covers parts of him in honey and leads ants to him.  Ibrahim can wait until Sir Ian tells him what he wants to know.

Leicester is questioning Vickie, and the Doctor is less than complimentary to Leicester and his desire to fight.  The King overhears and puts an end to the questioning.  He also tells the Doctor that he knows he didn’t betray his plan but that it was expedient to pretend that he did.  Leicester is a good fighter, and he’s going to need him.  Having made an enemy of Leicester, the King sends the Doctor and Vickie to Acre.  The Doctor readily agrees, and they leave immediately, although he’s actually planning to return to the TARDIS.

Barbara has found sanctuary in El Akir’s Harem.  She meets Haroun’s eldest daughter, who tells her they all (apparently) hate El Akir and agree to hide her.  All, save for one, who betrays Barbara in for a ruby ring.

In the desert, with the ants ever closer, Sir Ian cracks under pressure and agrees to turn over his gold.  He convinces Ibrahim that it is in his boots, but when they are removed, Sir Ian’s foot odor overpowers Ibrahim and rots the ropes binding Sir Ian’s wrists.  He subdues Ibrahim and forces him to take him to Lydda.

In Jaffa, Leicester learns of the Doctor’s departure and sends his men to follow them.  Unfortunately. The TARDIS lies in the direction of Saladin’s camp, not in the direction of Acre.  This gives Leicester all the proof he needs that the Doctor is a spy.

El Akir finds Barbara; this time, he’s really cross, but simultaneously two things happen. Haroun, who was just left in the streets, bursts in and… I don’t know, probably kills El Akir, and then Sir Ian shows up to non-lethally thump a few heads.  They are both safe and head back to the TARDIS.

The Doctor and Vickie are aware that Leicester’s men are trying to entrap them, so the Doctor comes up with a picture-perfect plan for a telesnap reconstruction – they must make absolutely no sound whatsoever!

This doesn’t work, and the Doctor is captured and about to be killed when Sir Ian arrives and claims the right to kill the Doctor for himself.  They get in the TARDIS and leave to the bewilderment of Leicester and his men.