CC Sabathia gets that unearned bonus and almost has a heart attack. We were THIS CLOSE in our predictions. We can’t completely shake our Dominican infielder boyfriend rut, but we add the Dad factor. For the Rangers, Pottymouth selects Yankee-killer Ronald Guzman, and Patti goes with super nice dude Scott Heineman. Closer to home, Pottymouth gets Phillies catcher Jorge Alfaro for real this time, and Patti takes newly-acquired All-Star Jean Segura, forcing her to say nice things about Robinson Cano. MLB and the Cuban Baseball Federation come to an agreement cutting out the smugglers and the peril and the defections to allow Cubans to play in the US, and players already here to go home again. Pottymouth then wanders off to watch winter baseball and Patti crosstrains with professional football. Go, Browns.