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#69 Death as a Doorway to Life
Most of us spend our lives avoiding the one thing that’s guaranteed: death.
In this raw and honest exchange, Lenerd Louw and I unpack what changes when we stop running from death and start learning from it.
We share personal stories of loss, grief, identity-death, and what it takes to transform our relationship with the unknown. This is not a morbid conversation; it’s a wake-up call.
Because the more you face death, the more you start to really live.
If you’ve been in a season of transition, heartbreak, loss, or change, this one will meet you where you are.
This episode also offers a behind-the-scenes look at the inspiration behind Soul Safari - our transformational men’s retreat into the wilds of South Africa. Created for men who feel the quiet whisper of their soul calling for something more, Soul Safari is an invitation to unplug, reset, and reconnect to what really matters.
Soul Safari: 17-27 March 2026 | South Africa
You weren’t put on this earth to grind, scroll, and survive until the weekend.
Over 11 days in South Africa’s wildest landscapes, you’ll step out of your normal routine and into a sacred container of brotherhood, stillness, and soul-awakening clarity. We strip back the noise. Go off the grid. Sit in silence. Share around the fire. And listen deeply to what life is really asking of you.
If you’ve been looking for a sign - this is it.
And it might just change the next decade of your life.
Apply now: Soul SafariOnly 10 spots available
THE KING'S CIRCLE: A DOJO FOR INTEGRATED LEADERS
An integrated leader recognises that we all have inner work to do. So, these new-paradigm leaders seek out people, processes, and places that help them identify and integrate their blind spots.
Each month, Fathers Sons Brothers hosts the King's Circle, a free two-hour transformational leadership training experience. It’s a men-only space where visionaries gather to learn tools and frameworks that make them better communicators and more integrated leaders.
When you regularly invest in this type of training:
All growth after puberty is optional and the men who attend our circle have a growth mindset like you.
We support each other in becoming the new paradigm of courageous leaders we've been waiting for.
Secure your free seat in The King’s Circle here: https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/kings-circle.
ABOUT OUR GUEST
Lenerd achieved success relatively early in his life, running Marketing and Advertising for a big direct insurance group in South Africa in his early thirties and becoming a CEO in his early forties. However, in his mid-forties, he had a strong inner voice telling him to change everything in his life. It did not make any sense, so he distracted himself with sex, drugs and jacuzzies for four years. What seemed glamorous on the outside was actually a deep, dark, desperate time on the inside.
Eventually, in 2013, after this deep dark night of the soul, he heeded the call, resigned, sold and gave away most of his possessions, bought a backpack and a one-way ticket to Lima in Peru, which started a five-year, 35-country journey around the world. He attended numerous workshops and initiations on spirituality and sexuality around the world. His next destination was always based on where the next learning opportunity was.
In 2019 Lenerd’s memoir, JUMP! An epic soul and sex adventure was published across all major bookstores in Southern Africa which led him to being approached by men in similar situations to which he was in, way back then.
Connect with him on:
Website, Instagram, Linkedin, YouTube, Facebook
ABOUT YOUR HOST
Gareth Pickering is an artist and thought leader. His inspiration is to create spaces for men to have open and honest conversations that shift their mindset and live life to the fullest. He’s a human connection specialist who guides others to level up with their lives through “relationships”. Relationships are a rocket ship for personal development. Gareth provides the tools and maps to fly and land your rocket safely.
Connect with him on:
Website, Instagram, Linkedin, X, Facebook
View all episodes
By Gareth Pickering and Matt DahseMost of us spend our lives avoiding the one thing that’s guaranteed: death.
In this raw and honest exchange, Lenerd Louw and I unpack what changes when we stop running from death and start learning from it.
We share personal stories of loss, grief, identity-death, and what it takes to transform our relationship with the unknown. This is not a morbid conversation; it’s a wake-up call.
Because the more you face death, the more you start to really live.
If you’ve been in a season of transition, heartbreak, loss, or change, this one will meet you where you are.
This episode also offers a behind-the-scenes look at the inspiration behind Soul Safari - our transformational men’s retreat into the wilds of South Africa. Created for men who feel the quiet whisper of their soul calling for something more, Soul Safari is an invitation to unplug, reset, and reconnect to what really matters.
Soul Safari: 17-27 March 2026 | South Africa
You weren’t put on this earth to grind, scroll, and survive until the weekend.
Over 11 days in South Africa’s wildest landscapes, you’ll step out of your normal routine and into a sacred container of brotherhood, stillness, and soul-awakening clarity. We strip back the noise. Go off the grid. Sit in silence. Share around the fire. And listen deeply to what life is really asking of you.
If you’ve been looking for a sign - this is it.
And it might just change the next decade of your life.
Apply now: Soul SafariOnly 10 spots available
THE KING'S CIRCLE: A DOJO FOR INTEGRATED LEADERS
An integrated leader recognises that we all have inner work to do. So, these new-paradigm leaders seek out people, processes, and places that help them identify and integrate their blind spots.
Each month, Fathers Sons Brothers hosts the King's Circle, a free two-hour transformational leadership training experience. It’s a men-only space where visionaries gather to learn tools and frameworks that make them better communicators and more integrated leaders.
When you regularly invest in this type of training:
All growth after puberty is optional and the men who attend our circle have a growth mindset like you.
We support each other in becoming the new paradigm of courageous leaders we've been waiting for.
Secure your free seat in The King’s Circle here: https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/kings-circle.
ABOUT OUR GUEST
Lenerd achieved success relatively early in his life, running Marketing and Advertising for a big direct insurance group in South Africa in his early thirties and becoming a CEO in his early forties. However, in his mid-forties, he had a strong inner voice telling him to change everything in his life. It did not make any sense, so he distracted himself with sex, drugs and jacuzzies for four years. What seemed glamorous on the outside was actually a deep, dark, desperate time on the inside.
Eventually, in 2013, after this deep dark night of the soul, he heeded the call, resigned, sold and gave away most of his possessions, bought a backpack and a one-way ticket to Lima in Peru, which started a five-year, 35-country journey around the world. He attended numerous workshops and initiations on spirituality and sexuality around the world. His next destination was always based on where the next learning opportunity was.
In 2019 Lenerd’s memoir, JUMP! An epic soul and sex adventure was published across all major bookstores in Southern Africa which led him to being approached by men in similar situations to which he was in, way back then.
Connect with him on:
Website, Instagram, Linkedin, YouTube, Facebook
ABOUT YOUR HOST
Gareth Pickering is an artist and thought leader. His inspiration is to create spaces for men to have open and honest conversations that shift their mindset and live life to the fullest. He’s a human connection specialist who guides others to level up with their lives through “relationships”. Relationships are a rocket ship for personal development. Gareth provides the tools and maps to fly and land your rocket safely.
Connect with him on:
Website, Instagram, Linkedin, X, Facebook