Show Notes

 

04:08 - 08:33 Journey to discovering Martial Arts

 

The beauty of chaos is the peace you see in its midst. In chaos, I saw the most peaceful moment of my life—no masks, limitations, ego. You are free. All of the old ways of thinking are somehow turned off and you become truly present. When choosing between fight or flight, remember that having courage is a choice inside of fear, not the absence of fear.

 

09:41- 10:56 Finding the authentic self and finding who we're not

 

The authentic self is the unbiased noticing observer that you are. The martial arts path teaches that the enemy was never outside, it's that voice within. We are a collection of our wounds from rejection, betrayal, and abandonment, which makes us seek security, control and approval. That constant seeking is the enemy.

 

11:09- 17:41 Quieting the chatter and getting into flow

 

We try to trigger to get into flow. But flow is natural. We just have to figure out what can stop us from falling out of it. The trying itself creates expectations and tensions that actually impede it.

 

Flow is always present. Flow is being. Flow is really us, devoid of these other things. But we stop being in the flow because of our attachments to victory and defeat, to people, places and things, and to security, control and approval.

 

The thoughts will keep coming. But we have to be aware of who is thinking.

 

17:45 -  19:58 Five by Five by Five Challenge: Simple practice you can do to rid the things that block your flow and change your perspective.

 

For five days, five times a day for five minutes, you set a time alone. Focus on your breathing and try to achieve stillness of the breath, mind and body. The stillness of the body is when you stop and sit straight. The stillness of breath lies at that moment between the inhale and the exhale while the stillness of the body. The stillness of the mind lies in the breath.

 

20:01 -  23:13 Deepening your awareness

 

Practice deepening the awareness of yourself, of others, and the situation. Between the stimulus and our response. And in that space, we choose our response. This is the same foundation for making the choice for building healthy habits.

 

23:13 - 28:27 Building a conscious operating system

 

The greatest move of all in martial arts is the time out. It is the ability to pause, breathe, step back, survey the situation without an emotional attachment and see clearly for what it is and then choose a response.

 

We can build this system and ability: the CQ (conscious quotient).

 

28:37 - 33:27 The Stillness Method

 

We have to stop reacting in the tensions created from our reactions by training to cultivate three stillnesses:

1. Stillness in stillness: in a seated posture, not moving
2. Stillness in movement: start to move and maintain the stillness
3. Stillness in movement in chaos: peace in the chaos

 

33:34 - 35:32 There's no hack to tap into consciousness.

 

The secret is in the ways in training—in transformation. You have to go do the work to do it, that's why it's priceless. Especially for men, practice listening. 

 

35:44 - 40:20 Discipline Over Doubt

 

It's NOT a discipline problem; it's a self-worth and self-love problem.

 

The primary response system should be self-love and discipline is the emergency response system. That way, it is more sustainable.

 

41:10 -  Free yourself from you

 

We thought that getting our power back is by exerting power over others and being able to control it. But the truth is, conquering yourself is what makes you fearless.

 

Death frees you and allows you to live from moment to moment and to become passionate and kind. And that takes strength.