What if the thing standing between you and the life you actually want isn't your circumstances — it's still thinking in terms of “or” instead of “and”?

Alex Kuhn, founder of Born Leaders (now rebranding to All In Worldwide), joins me for a conversation about ambition, identity, and what it really means to go all in — on your career and your family, your dreams and your present moment. Alex was the guy who left home at 12 to chase Olympic swimming dreams, became one of the fastest-rising college swim coaches in the country, then lost it all — the job, the relationship, and his sense of self — in the span of a few months. What came out of that rock bottom was a total identity resurrection that has shaped everything he does today.

Whether you're a dad navigating how to be fully present at home while still building something meaningful, a parent wondering if going after your dreams is selfish, or someone stuck in binary thinking about what you can and can't have — this one is for you. And yes, this episode is releasing Father's Day week, but the message is for everyone.

Highlights

• Why Alex chose a $20,000/year swim coaching job in Iowa over a Nike management training offer — and what that decision taught him
• The "or to and" shift: how identifying yourself by your title keeps you stuck in binary thinking
• Getting fired, losing the relationship, and eating bananas and popsicles on his sister's couch — Alex's rock bottom story
• Why the first step out of rock bottom isn't belief — it's action
• What self-trust actually means (hint: it's not about having all the answers)
• The "selfish vision" framework Alex uses with his whole family — including his 7- and 4-year-olds
• Why parenthood doesn't have to be all sacrifice, and the powerful modeling that happens when kids watch you chase your own dreams
• Redefining "juggling it all" — and giving yourself permission to drop a ball
• Boundaries as subtraction, not addition: stop adding to your life and start dumping what doesn't serve you
• Shutting the business down four weeks a year — and why it works
• The story Alex's dad told him at a swim meet that became his life's mantra: fight for yourself

Chapters

1:03 — Meet Alex Kuhn

2:51 — Fatherhood and second acts

3:52 — Early ambition and swimming

5:58 — Chasing legacy and empire

8:29 — From "or" to "and"

11:04 — Getting fired and the identity collapse

13:37 — Climbing out of rock bottom

16:22 — Self-trust and the messy middle

19:04 — Redefining ambition today

20:29 — The family vision weekly ritual

21:18 — Family vision sync

22:17 — Team family mindset

23:50 — Kids follow actions, not words

25:51 — The selfish parenting reframe

28:21 — Juggling without perfection

30:09 — Boundaries and seasons

33:35 — Seasonal business shutdowns

35:35 — Fight for yourself

37:57 — Where to find Alex

Resources

• Alex Kuhn's websites: :https://bornleaders.com/ and  allinwithalex.com

Want to learn more?

The Thread

Be sure to follow me @audradinell on Instagram and LinkedIn

This show is part of the ICT Podcast Network.

Disclaimer: we may receive a small commission on any products purchased through the links used in this episode. I only recommend tools and resources I actually use and find valuable.