Goradia says she grew up with yelling, screaming, and physical violence at home and thought that was the way it was. Then she got pregnant and "realized I didn’t want to hurt this 6 week old baby.” She tried six therapists until she found the right person to help her implement the “dream of the way I’d like to be parented.” To share her learning, Goradia created the global foundation Raftcares.org (Resilience for Advocates Through Foundational Training) so that anyone can listen to her free classes and break these terrible cycles.  Or you can start with “The Power of a Positive No" by William Ury (https://amzn.to/2SoCi1G), one of her “favorite tools".