Will & Luke Discuss

#9 On Confidence (The School of Life, 2017)

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What is confidence? How is it developed?  

This week we look at The School of Life's short book 'On Confidence'. We explore the key ideas of confidence, actions and skills we can develop, and how befriending our inner idiot helps us understand our own and others' flaws. We unpack the historical conceptions of confidence and the developmental stages we go through. We finish with how a stoic conceptualisation of death can bring about more confidence to live fully and less critically in order to sooth our remembering self.  

Hope you enjoy. 

Will & Luke  

  • 00:15 Introductions 
  • 07:00 What is confidence? (Trust of others- Secrets - Trust of self) (An action, will and skill) 
  • 08:45 Trusting your own decisions 
  • 10:15 Others opinions and criticism. (Fritz Pearls poem.  Internal drive to look good) (We only see ourselves from the inside and others from the outside) 
  • 14:45 Befriending the inner idiot (Accepting flaws - our own and others) 
  • 22:00 Not taking life to seriously vs self deprecation (People want connection not 'success') 
  • 28:00 Putting yourself out there - confidence as a decision 
  • 33:55 Attachment and integrating an internal secure base 
  • 37:00 Resilience as a key part of confidence (how we replay old stories) 
  • 42:15 Asserting ones self - choosing confidence (it's not brutishness) (Being too attached to modesty) 
  • 43:35 Confidence in confidence 
  • 45:55 Difference between requests and demands & How we look up to others (developmental stages) 
  • 49:10 Death and confidence 
  • 57:00 Final thoughts   

    • Purchase the book at: https://www.theschooloflife.com/london/

    This specific episode can also be seen on: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJVTubXru18

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