Today’s episode explores one of the most tender, and often misunderstood, parts of dementia care: denial. Kelly will talk about why denial shows up, why it isn’t always stubbornness, and how fear, identity, and self-protection play a role. She'll also offer ways to start compassionate conversations, how to respond when others don’t see the problem, and what to do when denial becomes unsafe — without damaging trust or dignity. If you’ve ever heard the words, “I’m fine, nothing is wrong,” and felt stuck between worry and love… this episode is for you.

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https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103

Please consider donating to support A BALANCING ACT!

https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss

RESOURCES:

https://www.everydayhealth.com/alzheimers-disease/how-talk-loved-about-signs-alzheimers-disease/

https://www.askelbi.com/post/when-your-parent-is-in-denial-about-dementia-how-to-navigate-this-difficult-conversation-with-compassion

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

As this year comes to a close, I just want to take a moment to thank you for being here. Whether you’re listening while driving, folding laundry, sitting quietly after a long day, or taking a much-needed pause—you matter, and I’m really glad you found your way to this space.

The holidays can bring warmth and connection, but they can also bring grief, stress, complicated family dynamics, and reminders of how much has changed when memory loss is part of your life. If this season feels heavy for you, please know—you’re not doing it wrong. You’re responding to something hard with love, and that takes courage.

My hope is that, wherever you are right now, you can offer yourself a little grace. Connection doesn’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. Presence doesn’t have to look the way it used to. And love doesn’t disappear just because things are different.

Thank you for trusting me with your time, your stories, and your hearts this year. It’s truly a privilege to walk alongside you in this journey.

From my heart to yours, I’m wishing you moments of peace, comfort, and gentle connection this holiday season. And always—remember, no one should walk this journey alone.

-Kelly

The holidays bring joy, memories, and for long-distance caregivers, a mix of love and guilt. In this episode of A Balancing Act, Kelly offers loving, practical ways to stay connected with your loved one living with dementia, even from miles away. Learn how to make every call and visit more meaningful, how to support the caregiver at home, and how to find help for yourself when it’s time to hang up the phone, or travel back to your home. Because caregiving doesn’t stop when there is distance between you-it just changes shape.

FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat!

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103

Please consider donating to support A BALANCING ACT!

https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss

RESOURCES:

https://magazine.medlineplus.gov/article/helping-from-miles-away-strategies-for-long-distance-caregiving

https://www.caregiveraction.org/i-dont-live-my-family-im-caregiver/#:~:text=Several%20tools%20and%20resources%20can%20aid%20in,advice%20from%20other%20caregivers%20facing%20similar%20challenges.

https://www.alz.org/help-support/caregiving/care-options/long-distance-caregiving

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

Thanksgiving is here, and while the holidays can be full of joy and tradition, they can also be challenging when someone you love is living with memory loss and dementia, In this episode, Kelly explores how to adjust expectations with compassion, how to support your loved one at their level of ability, and how to protect connection over perfection. Whether you’re hosting a big family meal or calling from a distance, these ideas can help bring more peace and less overwhelm to the day.

Our Facebook page: Message your questions!

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Buy Me A Coffee- donate to A Balancing Act!

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Resources:

https://nhdementiatraining.org/2021/12/20/tips-for-spending-holidays-with-those-with-dementia/

https://alzheimer.ca/en/help-support/i-have-friend-or-family-member-who-lives-dementia/holidays-special-occasions

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast

In this episode, we talk about what happens when a loved one begins losing their sense of time — mixing up days, seasons, appointments, or believing events are happening “right now” when they aren’t. These time slips can be confusing and emotional for everyone involved. We’ll explore why the brain struggles to track time in dementia and share gentle ways to respond, reduce stress, and stay connected when time doesn’t feel steady anymore.

FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat!

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103

Please consider donating to support A BALANCING ACT!

https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss

RESOURCES:

https://cicoa.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/04/Memory-Aids_Dementia.pdf

https://www.homecare.co.uk/advice/time-perception-and-dementia

https://alzheimer.ca/en/help-support/im-caring-person-living-dementia/providing-day-day-care/setting-routines-reminders

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

Taking away the car keys is one of the hardest moments in dementia care. It’s not just about safety. It’s about love, dignity, and protection. In this week’s episode, Kelly will guide you through the signs it’s time, how to talk about it, what to do if your loved one refuses, and how to plan for what comes next, all while helping your loved one feel supported, not punished.

FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat!

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103

Want to support or subscribe to A BALANCING ACT?

https://buymeacoffee.com/navigatingmemoryloss

RESOURCES:

https://www.alz.org/help-support/caregiving/safety/dementia-driving

https://thecaregiversjourney.org/sometimes-its-easy-sometimes-its-hard-practical-tips-for-removing-driving-privileges-from-our-loved-ones-with-alzheimers-or-other-dementias/

https://www.health.harvard.edu/diseases-and-conditions/driving-and-dementia-take-away-the-keys

Driving Assessment Resources:

• American Occupational Therapy Association (AOTA)

aota.org/driver-safety

•A l z h e i m e r ' s A s s o c i a t i o n

Guidance on dementia & driving, 24/7 Helpline:

alz.org | 1-800-272-3900

• AAA Senior Driving Self-assessment tools & local programs:

seniordriving.aaa.com

• AARP Driver Safety Program Courses & resources for older adults:

aarp.org/auto/driver-safety/

• S t a t e DMV

Many offer senior testing or referrals. Check your state's DMV website.

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

Many families delay a dementia diagnosis because they’re afraid of what it means—losing independence, disrupting family life, or facing an uncertain future. But silence only makes the journey harder. In this episode, Kelly explores where stigma comes from, why it keeps people from seeking help, and how we can begin to change the conversation. You’ll hear stories of fear, resilience, and community, and learn ways to break the silence so no one has to walk this journey alone.

FACEBOOK PAGE: Message your questions or comments. We'd love to hear how you're doing!

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103

RESOURCES:

https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/medical/diagnosis-after-early-signs-of-dementia/

https://www.alz.org/alzheimers-dementia/diagnosis/why-get-checked

https://hub.jhu.edu/2016/06/02/risks-of-not-diagnosing-dementia/

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

One of the hardest challenges in caregiving is when a loved one with dementia refuses help. You see the risks — missed meals, cluttered spaces, unpaid bills — but every offer is met with “I don’t need help” or “I can do it myself.” It’s frustrating, even heartbreaking. In this episode, Kelly unpacks the reasons behind refusals — from changes in the brain to pride and fear — and explore the most common areas of conflict. Most importantly, you’ll learn practical strategies to shift your approach so that you can reduce conflict, preserve dignity, and find those small but powerful wins in your caregiving journey.

FACEBOOK PAGE: We'd love to hear from you! Message Kelly with any questions or comments.

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103

RESOURCES:

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/blog/how-offer-help-someone-dementia-who-doesnt-want-it#:~:text=For%20some%20people%2C%20they%20may,having%20a%20diagnosis%20of%20dementia.

https://www.bridgesbyepoch.com/2025/03/10/resistance-and-refusals-in-a-loved-one/#:~:text=Pride%20and%20dignity:%20Early%20dementia,play%20a%20role%20in%20resistance.

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

Caregiving is rewarding, but it can also feel overwhelming—like you’re carrying the weight of a thousand little tasks. In this episode, Kelly explores the best tech tools designed to lighten the caregiver’s load. From medication reminder apps and “Find My” trackers to simple video calling platforms and automatic shut-offs for home safety, these smart solutions are changing the way families care for their loved ones. And get some more time in for themselves.

FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave your questions for Kelly!

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103

RESOURCES:

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/living-with-dementia/how-technology-can-help

https://www.aarp.org/personal-technology/dementia-caregiver-technology//

Caregiving Tech & Support Resources

Caregiving Apps & Tools

• Medisafe – Medication reminder app that syncs with caregivers.

• CareZone – Centralized place for meds, calendars, and health notes.

• Lotsa Helping Hands – Shared calendars and task management for families.

• Symple or CareClinic – Symptom tracking and health journaling apps.

“Find My” & Tracking Gadgets

• Apple AirTags – Small Bluetooth trackers for keys, wallets, or bags.

• Tile Trackers – Simple tags with phone alerts and community locating.

Entertainment & Connection

• GrandPad – Simplified tablet for video calls, email, and photos (senior-friendly).

• ViewClix Digital Frames – Upload photos remotely; loved ones see them instantly.

• Simple Streaming Remotes – Universal remotes with large buttons and pre-set channels (e.g.,

Flipper Remote).

Safety & Monitoring

• Alexa Together (Amazon) – Fall detection, daily activity check-ins, and alerts for caregivers.

• AngelSense or Medical Guardian – GPS + emergency wearables with caregiver alerts.

• Smart Plugs (Kasa, Wemo) – Automatic shut-off for coffee makers, TVs, or lamps.

• FireAvert – Stove shut-off device designed for kitchen safety.

Caregiver Support & Community

• Family Caregiver Alliance (caregiver.org) – Education, resources, and support groups.

• AARP Caregiving Resources – Guides, toolkits, and caregiver stories.

• The Caregiver Action Network (caregiveraction.org) – Peer support and resources.

• Alzheimer’s Association Support Groups – Both online and local chapter connections.

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

In this episode, Kelly provides essential guidance for families visiting loved ones in memory care communities. Kelly addresses common challenges families face, such as improving the quality of visits and setting realistic expectations. She emphasizes the importance of understanding the stages of dementia and aligning visits with the routine and preferences of the loved one. Practical advice includes planning visits around constructive activities, bringing items of interest, managing sensory overload, and maintaining effective communication.

FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat!

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103

RESOURCES:

https://alzheimer.ca/en/help-support/i-have-friend-or-family-member-who-lives-dementia/making-meaningful-visits

https://training.mmlearn.org/blog/dementia-and-family-visits-tips-for-peaceful-connection

Video: The Do's and Don'ts of Visiting A Loved One In Memory Care:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_CzKR4mCbE

The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.