A Heart That Beats for Home

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As our kids get older, one of the hardest parts of parenting is knowing when to step in and when to step back.

This week’s episode came out of a conversation I had with a girlfriend about that exact tension. When do we let our kids make their own decisions? When do we allow natural consequences to do some of the teaching? And how do we begin releasing control without releasing the responsibility we still have as parents?

I want my kids to fail at home.

Not because I want life to be hard for them, but because home is one of the safest places for them to make manageable mistakes, learn how to repair what went wrong, build resilience, and discover that they are capable of figuring things out.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why releasing control happens through hundreds of small moments
• Moving from being our kids’ manager to becoming more of a coach and mentor
• The “freshman, JV, varsity” approach to increasing responsibility as our kids mature
• How to decide which mistakes are safe enough to let our kids make
• Three questions to ask when deciding whether to step in
• Why constantly rescuing our kids can actually make adulthood harder
• Teaching teens to communicate with teachers, make appointments, manage responsibilities, and clean up their own mistakes
• How failure can build confidence, independence, responsibility, and resilience
• Why our expectations can grow while our love and support remain completely steady

We don’t have to solve every manageable problem for our kids.

We can guide them. We can ask good questions. We can share wisdom. We can protect them when the stakes are truly high.

And then, sometimes, we have to give them enough room to try.

Because ultimately, we aren’t raising children who will always need us to manage their lives. We are raising future adults who need to know: I can think through this. I can make a decision. I can own the outcome. I can repair a mistake. And I can try again.

Maybe the question for us isn’t, “Did I do everything I could to make sure they made the right decision?”

Maybe it’s, “Did I say what mattered, give them the guidance they needed, and leave enough room for them to grow?”

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100 episodes.

It’s honestly a little hard to believe we’re here.

When A Heart That Beats for Home began nearly three years ago, I knew I had a heart for encouraging women to cultivate strong marriages, intentional families, and homes centered around biblical truth. What I didn’t know was where God would take it.

One hundred episodes later, this little podcast has been listened to in 97 countries, 2,228 cities, and six of the seven continents. We’ve shared 63 solo episodes and welcomed guests for 37 interviews—and somehow this community continues to grow.

More than the numbers, though, I’m overwhelmed by the stories. The messages from women who heard exactly what they needed in a difficult season. The conversations that have made their way into marriages and parenting and friendships. The listeners who have shared an episode with someone they love. And the incredible privilege I’ve had of sitting across from people whose wisdom has changed the way I think and live.

So for episode 100, we’re going back into the archives.

I’m sharing five conversations that have stayed with me long after I stopped recording—truths I still repeat, share with friends, and come back to in my own marriage, parenting, faith, and life.

We’ll revisit Marc and Lori’s powerful picture of strengthening a marriage by “overseeding” the good instead of becoming consumed with pulling weeds, along with the reminder that our feelings can be strong without always being true.

We’ll hear from Betsy Dirkse about recognizing and honoring the weight our spouses carry—and the importance of seeking to understand one another instead of only focusing on what we ourselves are carrying.

Justin Whitmel Earley reminds us that “the Lord is more gracious than we are hardworking,” that we can create healthy ruts of habit for our children without believing their entire future rests on our shoulders, and that while our habits don’t change God’s love for us, our love for God should absolutely change our habits.

We’ll return to one of the most difficult and beautiful conversations I’ve ever had, with Hadley, whose story of unimaginable loss taught me something I have repeated countless times since: God does not give us today the grace we would need for tomorrow’s tragedy. He gives us the grace when we need it. We do not have to live today afraid that we couldn't survive something God has not asked us to walk through.

And finally, I’m sharing part of one of the most personally meaningful interviews I’ve ever recorded—my conversation with John O’Leary. We talked about our dads, Parkinson’s, suffering, faith, and wrestling with the question of “why?” That conversation eventually led to an experience with John and my own dad that I will treasure for the rest of my life.

These are only five moments out of 100 episodes, but they represent so much of what I pray this podcast will always be: a place where we learn from one another, tell the truth about real life, point one another toward Jesus, and become more intentional about the homes and relationships entrusted to us.

To every person who has listened, shared an episode, sent me a message, left a review, encouraged me, or simply pressed play week after week—thank you.

Here’s to 100 episodes.

And, Lord willing, there is so much more to come.

If A Heart That Beats for Home has encouraged you, would you take a moment to rate and review the show on the podcast platform where you listen? Those ratings and reviews help more people discover the show—and ultimately help these conversations find their way into more homes.

Thank you for being part of this community. 🤍

Marc & Lori’s full marriage episode: 

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-heart-that-beats-for-home/id1719372285?i=1000757475559

Betsy Dirkse full episode:

Part 1- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-heart-that-beats-for-home/id1719372285?i=1000676940174

Part 2-https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-heart-that-beats-for-home/id1719372285?i=1000677761988

Justin Whitmel Earley’s full episode:

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-heart-that-beats-for-home/id1719372285?i=1000734194249

Check out a few of my favorite books of Justin’s:
Habits of the Household:

https://amzn.to/4AH1hkW

The Body Teaches the Soul:

https://amzn.to/4jfDLph

Hadley’s full Beauty From Ashes episode: 

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-heart-that-beats-for-home/id1719372285?i=1000684221659

John O’Leary’s full episode:

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-heart-that-beats-for-home/id1719372285?i=1000727335069

Soul on Fire Movie — 

https://johnolearyinspires.com/soulonfire/

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What are the “stones” in your family, the stories you never want your children to forget?

In Joshua 4, God instructed the Israelites to take twelve stones from the middle of the Jordan River and build a memorial. Why? So that one day, when their children asked, “What do these stones mean?” they could tell them the story of God’s faithfulness.

In this deeply personal episode, Nikki reflects on the stones within her own family: miscarriage and postpartum depression, closed doors that became protection, unexpected redirection, hospital rooms, a heart attack, pulmonary embolisms, and seasons when the ending was anything but certain.

But God’s faithfulness cannot be measured only by whether a story ends the way we hoped. Sometimes the stone says, “Look what God fixed.” Other times, it simply says, “God was with us there.”

This conversation is an invitation to remember where God has met your family, and to intentionally pass those stories on to your children. Because someday they will face their own closed doors, unanswered prayers, hospital rooms, and Jordans. When that day comes, may they have stones to look back on that remind them:

God was with us there.
God was faithful there.
God did not abandon us there.
And He will be with you here, too.

In this episode:

• Why God repeatedly calls His people to remember
• How rejection can sometimes be God’s protection
• Recognizing God’s faithfulness even when circumstances do not change
• Why our children need to see us depend on God
• Practical ways to preserve and share your family’s faith stories
• The difference between protecting children from adult burdens and allowing them to witness authentic faith
• A simple challenge to identify one “stone” and share its story with your family this week

Scriptures referenced:

• Joshua 4:4–7
• Deuteronomy 6:7
• Deuteronomy 31:8
• Psalm 46:1

Resources mentioned:

• Five-Year Prayer Journal -                https://hosannarevival.com/collections/one-thing-i-ask/products/one-thing-i-ask-5-year-prayer-journal-edinburgh-theme
• Podcast - Deep Dive: Encouragement for the Weary:   https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/deep-dive-encouragement-for-the-weary/id1458672189?i=1000785448263
• 2 Week Sermon on God's Faithfulness- https://redeemerrockford.church/sermon/faithful-a-look-back/  https://redeemerrockford.church/sermon/faithful-a-look-forward-god-will-be-faithful/

If you are walking through a difficult season—or if you have questions about what it means to have a relationship with Jesus—please reach out. Nikki would be honored to connect with you, pray with you, or help you find a Bible and a place to begin.

Next week, join us as we celebrate the 100th episode of A Heart That Beats for Home and revisit some of the most meaningful lessons and conversations from the past three years.

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We all want deeper relationships with the people we love, but sometimes we’re waiting for meaningful conversations to happen instead of learning how to invite them.

In this episode, Nikki explores the art of asking good questions and how simple curiosity can help our children, teenagers, spouses, and friends feel truly known, heard, and seen. She shares seven practical ways to move beyond questions that produce one-word answers and create conversations that build genuine connection.

You’ll learn why our questions need to grow as our children grow, how to ask the important second question, and why listening without immediately correcting, advising, or trying to fix the problem matters so much. Nikki also discusses staying curious about your spouse, becoming a safe place for honest answers, and building enough margin into family life for meaningful conversations to unfold.

Loving someone isn’t only knowing who they’ve been, it’s staying curious about who they’re becoming. This week, choose one person you love, ask a question you’ve never asked before, and then stay long enough to truly listen to the answer.

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What happens when you ask your kids what you do that makes them cringe?

For this episode, the answer came from a simple phrase: “my mama heart.” What started as a funny conversation with a daughter turned into a much bigger realization... of course our kids don’t fully understand the mama heart yet. They haven’t experienced one.

Motherhood changes the way a heart operates. We feel their disappointments, celebrate their wins, worry about things completely outside of our control, and sometimes find ourselves wanting to step in and fix what may not actually be ours to fix.

This episode explores the joy, worry, pride, fear, letting go, and deep love that come with a mama heart, along with four practical reminders for navigating it all:

• Name what you’re actually carrying.
• Ask, “Is this mine to carry?”
• Don’t confuse feeling it with fixing it.
• Give your mama heart somewhere to put it all.

From knowing when to step in and when to simply stand close, to learning to surrender the things we cannot control, this conversation is a reminder that we can love our children deeply without carrying everything for them.

And maybe that phrase our kids think is a little cringey? Someday, they’ll understand. 

Show Resources:

Praying the Scriptures for Your Children:

https://amzn.to/4ysaJqK

Praying the Scriptures for Your Teens:

https://amzn.to/3UyziDN

Praying the Scriptures for Your Adult Children:

https://amzn.to/4A7fnw0

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Biblical Resources for Families:

Favorite Children's Bibles:
The Biggest Bible Story: https://amzn.to/3uHo1o5
The Biggest Bible Board Book Version: https://amzn.to/3ThT2YU
The Biggest Bible Story Storybook: https://amzn.to/4bYDEbx
The Jesus Storybook Bible: https://amzn.to/3UT37Nm

Seeds Family Worship Music:
https://seedskidsworship.com/product-category/music/
On Spotify : https://open.spotify.com/artist/5kV2pC0biCYFh3y9HxgNkS
On Apple:  https://music.apple.com/us/artist/seeds-family-worship/251295888

Scripture Lullabies:
On Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/3egDut5sE3JIphJpVLO0z4
On Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/scripture-lullabies/464465134

Praise Baby:
On Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0uIyzjmP48YI0dpgdAjdeI
On Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/album/sleepytime-lullabies/372543219

Abby Houston - Melodically Memorizing:
On Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/1CcoMJoJtlZrt2w6XSbj6c?si=9kKzk_T-Tc2JWQq2CQFVog
On Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/abby-houston/1173348681

Favorite Books: 

You are Special by Max Lucado: https://amzn.to/497d6VM

You are Mine by Max Lucado: https://amzn.to/4nJTJrW

Because I Love You by Max Lucado: https://amzn.to/4v2vffW

Tale of the Poisonous Yuck Bug: https://booksrun.com/9780310709558-tale-of-the-poisonous-yuck-bugs-based-on-proverbs-12-18-insect-inside-series-the

This week on A Heart That Beats for Home, we’re talking about the emotional atmosphere inside our homes and the powerful role peace plays within the walls we live in every day.

As moms, we often carry more influence over the tone of our homes than we even realize. In this episode, Nikki shares practical ways we can intentionally cultivate peace instead of chaos, connection instead of control, and emotional safety instead of tension, especially heading into the busy summer months when routines shift and emotions can run high.

Through personal stories, biblical encouragement, and honest reflections on motherhood, Nikki walks through practical ways to reset when we feel overwhelmed, how to slow the emotional pace of our homes, why quick repair matters so deeply, and the importance of creating homes where people feel safe, seen, and able to exhale.

The episode closes with a deeply personal reflection on her children’s recent baptisms and the reminder that the ordinary rhythms of motherhood, bedtime routines, conversations, songs, and small moments, are often the very places where God is quietly doing kingdom work.

This episode is an encouragement to every mom who has ever wondered if the little things matter. They do.

Podcast Episode with Justin Whitmel Earley: (box breathing reference)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-heart-that-beats-for-home/id1719372285?i=1000734194249

Podcast Episode with Marc & Lori Maillefer: (Creating an Environment of Peace/ Candlelight Dinners)

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/a-heart-that-beats-for-home/id1719372285?i=1000757475559

Bible Verses:

•  Proverbs 15:1 
•  Proverbs 14:1 
•  Proverbs 17:1 
•  Galatians 5 
•  Deuteronomy 6:7

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This week on A Heart That Beats for Home, I’m joined by Ryann Bauer for one of the most powerful and important conversations we’ve had on the podcast. Ryann shares her deeply personal story of childhood abandonment, depression, self-harm, and becoming a young mom, and how God slowly redeemed her pain and turned it into purpose. What began as heartbreak has now become a passionate mission to protect children and raise awareness around human trafficking, grooming, and child exploitation.

Together, we talk honestly about the realities parents are facing in today’s digital world, from gaming platforms and social media apps to the subtle signs of grooming that so many families miss. Ryann shares firsthand stories from her work alongside Dark Horse and law enforcement, helping educate parents and communities on how predators are accessing children online and what we can do to better protect them. This conversation is eye-opening, emotional, practical, and incredibly needed.

We also talk about Ryann’s vision for Freedom Bridge, a restoration ranch for survivors of trafficking and exploitation, where healing, purpose, mentorship, and faith can help women and children rebuild their lives. More than anything, this episode is a reminder that we cannot parent from fear, but we must parent with awareness, wisdom, and intentionality. I pray this conversation encourages you to lean in, ask hard questions, stay engaged in your children’s digital lives, and remember that our homes can be places of safety, truth, and healing.

Dark Horse Global: 

https://darkhorseglobal.org/

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This week’s episode is one of the most meaningful conversations I’ve ever shared on the podcast. In honor of Mother’s Day, I’m sitting down with my own mom, Monique, for a conversation about motherhood, faith, marriage, family, loss, legacy, and the beauty found in ordinary everyday life. 

My mom was married at 18 years old and went on to raise five daughters over nearly three decades of nonstop parenting. She shares openly about seasons of infertility and miscarriage, raising a family on a very tight budget, building a home centered around faith, and the lessons she learned through the many different stages of motherhood. From little girls gathered around the kitchen table to now watching grandchildren and even great-grandchildren grow, her life is a beautiful reminder that consistency, prayer, grace, and simple everyday faithfulness leave a legacy far greater than perfection ever could.

Throughout this conversation, we reflect on what made our home feel so safe and connected growing up, how faith was woven naturally into everyday life, why relationships matter more than rigid rules, and how parenting changes as children become adults. We also talk about grief, hard seasons, trusting God through uncertainty, and the importance of staying present in the years that often feel exhausting while you’re living them.

There are so many moments in motherhood that can feel mundane, repetitive, and unseen. But looking back now, so much of what felt ordinary at the time became the very foundation of the relationships, memories, and faith that continue to shape our family today. My prayer is that this episode encourages you, whether you are a young mom in the thick of raising little ones, navigating the teenage years, missing your own mother this Mother’s Day, longing to become a mom, or simply needing the reminder that the work you are doing inside your home matters deeply.

This conversation is tender, honest, emotional, and full of wisdom I know I’ll carry with me for the rest of my life. I’m so grateful I get to share it with you.

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This week’s episode is a continuation of a conversation that I truly believe every parent of teens and young adults needs to hear.

After revisiting one of the very first episodes of this podcast last week, I was reminded just how relevant these principles still are, and how much they continue to shape the way I parent today.

So this week, we’re finishing that conversation.

In this episode, we walk through three powerful ways to build deeper, lasting connection with your teens and young adults—especially in seasons that can feel overwhelming or uncertain.

We talk about:

•  Why living by example matters more than anything we say 
•  The importance of connecting more than correcting 
•  How to create real, meaningful connection with your kids 
•  The difference between monologue vs. dialogue in parenting 
•  Recognizing when your child needs to vent vs. receive advice 
•  Parenting each child individually based on their unique needs 

One of the most powerful reminders in this episode is the idea that parenting is like gardening. Each child has different needs, different wiring, and different ways they grow best, and it’s our role to pay attention and nurture them accordingly.

Whether this is your first time hearing this conversation or a revisit, my prayer is that it meets you right where you are and gives you one or two simple takeaways to help strengthen connection in your home.

Because at the end of the day… connection is what lasts.

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This week’s episode is a little different, and one I’m really excited to bring back.

As I was preparing to record a new episode on the topic of principles vs. preferences in parenting, I went back to revisit what I had already shared in the very early days of this podcast… and I was reminded just how much this conversation still matters.

In fact, it felt too important to try to recreate.

So today, we’re revisiting one of the very first episodes of A Heart That Beats for Home, a conversation around building connection with our teens and young adults, and learning how to choose what truly matters.

We’re diving into:

•  The difference between principles and preferences in parenting 
•  How trying to “be right” can damage connection 
•  Practical examples of where to hold firm—and where to let go 
•  Why protecting relationship should often take priority 
•  How to navigate the emotional intensity of the teen years 
•  Creating a safe space so your kids come to you first 

Whether you’ve been here since the beginning or you’re newer to the podcast, I truly believe this is one of those conversations that hits differently depending on the season you’re in.

Sometimes we don’t need new information… we need the right reminder.

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