Today we are back on the idea that when we are willing, we can change up the Rhythm Of Our Lives. We have talked about looking at yourself and deciding something has to change. Well, for the next few podcasts we are going to talk about the pieces of our psyche, our thinking and our habits that stop us from doing that. Today is a big one. It’s what I talk about in my book as the rebellious child/free child. When that side of us is healthy it is incredibly creative. It’s the side of our personality that thinks outside the box, rocks the boat for change. It’s the artist, it’s the creator. It’s the side of us that loves to play and have fun! We so need this side of us. It’s also called the creative child. But there is a challenge, when it goes overboard it’s the side of us that can totally screw up our lives.

I have said in many a podcast that we really are programmed. It’s as if our brain or our heart has been programmed by our past successes, our past experiences, our past communications and our past hurts. And along with all of that comes defense mechanisms. So what is a defense mechanism? It’s what REACTIONS we have created and even nurtured to defend ourselves against harm.

For instance, if someone had an abusive parent that never listened to them their usual REACTION may be to keep quiet so as not to get hurt, or leave the situation. Defending against harm. So this reaction as an adult may be to just get quiet in a fight, shutting down, shutting off or to and leave and escape the confrontation. That is not communicating or “responding” to the situation. It is reacting.

Join me today as we explore React or Respond, It's Your Choice. Ready?

Expect the unexpected is a way to encourage staying adaptable or flexible in any situation. The first step in staying flexible is to have an open mind! I like to point to a painting in my office and tell my clients not to frame the painting yet! Keep painting! Life is not static. It is also about embracing spontaneity!

Think about it. Expectations are static. But life is far from static. Having an open mind, being flexible is how you use your creativity, your problem-solving skills and your instincts in any situation that arrives to take the next step. Good or bad!

Are you ready for the unexpected? Listen in...

Whenever I have a client who is sad or unhappy or lonely, or still hasn’t found a purpose that brings them joy, or they are new in a town or city and haven’t met new people, and they come to me for help, the first thing I suggest is to find a place to volunteer. I know my clients who are listening to this have heard it from me so many times.

This holds especially true for people who suffer from depression. Why? When you volunteer it is an opportunity, a moment, or afternoon or week to not think about yourself! It gives you just a little time to try and help “a cause”. And by doing that it shifts your focus and perspective to such a huge degree that inevitably it starts to help you feel better. When you are in depression or feel lonely, you tend to circle back to negative thoughts and emotions about yourself And your life. But giving back can change that!

Today we’re going to have the absolute pleasure and fun in designing your ideal future! Years ago, I did my thesis on something called the Idealized Systems Design. What it is is a system that helps you create an ideal future for yourself. And what ideal means is, it could be anything in the world you want! No conditions, no holds barred. Nothing that says you can’t do it!

We are all part of systems. We’re part of a family system. We’re part of a community system. You may be part of a work system, or a creative system, or a charity system. We live in a world built of systems. And in truth you are a system your self! Your system is made up of your body, your health, your habits, your dreams. All of this creates the life you are experiencing. So part of the fun of creating an idealized systems design is looking at the system you are in and seeing what you need to change in order to reach your ideal future.

I heard this quote by Teddy Roosevelt and I knew it was going to be the next topic for us to delve into this season. “Comparison is the thief of joy.” What an unbelievably profound statement that is. In truth, how can we even compare ourselves to anyone else on the planet? Every single one of us has different talents, history, different upbringing, education, intelligence, different dreams, different relationships and different families! How can we possibly compare ourselves to someone else when all of those things make us who we are? Listen in and let's discover the answer together. Ready? Let's go...

Why do we have so many rules that take away so much of the fun in life? I’m not talking about doing dangerous things. I’m talking about doing something so simple as walking in the rain and how just doing that becomes an adventure that gives you a feeling of freedom that you never expected. I realized that walking in the rain represented so much of the same things for so many people. So many reasons why we can’t do something. So many limitations we put on ourselves.

When we do something so out of the box, so unexpected and against all social norms, believe it or not, our creativity is unlocked. I mean that’s what creativity is. Thinking outside the box creating with no boundaries and no holds barred. Creating as if you are walking in the rain.

I love that this season is called The Rhythm of your life. Because right now my rhythm keeps changing. I think the rhythm of my life is taking me in one direction then out of the blue a whole ‘nother song starts playing in my circumstances, in my life and eventually in my soul. So where am I going with this? I’ve just been thinking a lot about what happens when everything you expect to happen in your life changes. It’s what some would call the direction in your life. But for me it’s not like I am in a car going one direction and it changes. What it is for me is when I think I’m absolutely at peace in my life and all of a sudden something doesn’t feel right. Like my heart rhythm is not in sync with my present life circumstances or choices. Sometimes it’s not the circumstances but the people involved in the circumstances in my life. And sometimes it’s not a nice subtle message it’s a what the hell, earth shattering wake up call! And seriously… who doesn’t just love those?

This season of A Journey to Awareness is titled The Rhythm of our Lives. So often when we talk about self awareness or genuine self we leave out something that’s at the core of our happiness…finding what fulfills us. Well, what the heck does that mean? And, can you be fulfilled in one part of your life and not another? Ok, the answer to that is yes. And what fulfills you may not fulfill me, or your partner, or parents, or children or anyone else in your life. Today, let’s think about just a few of the most important aspects of your life that gives you a sense that your life is magnificently fulfilled; full and filled with all that magic that is in you and of you and for you!

Hello and welcome back to a journey to awareness, I’m Shauna Hoffman.

This second season of my podcast is wrapped around something I call the rhythm of our lives. In the first episode I spoke about how our bodies, minds and souls can feel a rhythm to it if we are self aware enough to sense it. Maybe a vibration, maybe a new beat or melody that is trying to guide us to where we are supposed to be. I touched on the thought that sometimes we get stuck in the song of our current life. When everything in your life is begging you to change the radio station! Change that song! Let go! But something has held you back.