A Little Bit Easier

A Little Bit Easier

By Pamela Lund and Sarah LangEducationSelf-Improvement
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A Little Bit Easier episodes

  • Why You Should Apologize More

    In this episode, Sarah and Pam discuss why you should get better at apologizing and do it more often. You'll learn why apologizing is especially important when the need to apologize to repair a wrong isn't as apparent, how to apologize effectively, and how sincere apologies actually change memories.


    Takeaways

    • Apologizing repairs relationships and strengthens connections.
    • Apologizing is a vulnerable form of communication that improves communication skills and fosters self-compassion.
    • Apologizing sets a positive example for others, especially children, and creates a culture of forgiveness and acceptance.
    • Being specific about what you are sorry for and listening to the other person's perspective are important when apologizing. Apologizing effectively requires empathy, accountability, and vulnerability.
    • Acknowledge the other person's feelings and take responsibility for your actions.
    • Avoid trying to convince the other person that you were right.
    • Focus on how you see the situation differently now and what you can change in the future.
    • Practice self-compassion to accept mistakes and learn from them.
    • Taking a walk during the apology can make the conversation flow better.
    • Apologizing is not about being a pushover or apologizing for existing.
    • Address underlying issues in a relationship instead of relying solely on apologies.
    • Celebrate the other person's successes and amplify their joy to strengthen the relationship.
    • When accepting an apology, be gracious, empathetic, and open to forgiveness.



      • 41 min
    • How to Navigate a Layoff

      This conversation revolves around personal experiences of job loss and layoffs, and provides tips for dealing with the emotional and practical aspects of a layoff. Sarah and Pam discuss the emotional impact of a layoff, the importance of self-care and self-reflection, and the need to build a strong support network. They also emphasize the significance of financial preparedness and continuous skill development. The conversation concludes with advice on how friends can support someone who has been laid off.


      Takeaways


      • Experiencing a layoff can have a significant emotional impact, including feelings of shock, shame, sadness, and self-doubt. It is important to acknowledge and process these emotions.
      • Take time to remember and nurture your identity outside of work. Engage in activities and relationships that bring you joy and fulfillment.
      • Financial preparedness is crucial. Aim to have at least three months of expenses saved in an emergency fund to provide a cushion in case of job loss.
      • Continuously develop your skills and stay connected in your industry. Networking and building your personal brand can open up opportunities and make you stand out to potential employers.
      • If you have a friend who has been laid off, be there for them, offer support, and include them in social activities. Avoid excluding them due to financial concerns.



        • 38 min
      • How to Use Gratitude to Feel Happier

        In this episode, Sarah and Pam discuss gratitude as an antidote to negativity bias and a path to happiness. Learn how gratitude is a habit that you can cultivate through practices such as journaling, mindfulness, and creating rituals. Developing a gratitude practice makes you feel in control of your life and increases satisfaction and happiness. Sharing gratitude with others can even improve personal relationships and workplace dynamics.

        The Ted Talk we mention: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UtBsl3j0YRQ

        The background sound app we mention: https://mynoise.net/

        38 min
      • Reading for Fun

        This conversation explores the decline in reading for pleasure and the importance of rebuilding the skill. We discuss the reasons why reading is important, such as the joy and relaxation it brings, the opportunity to learn from stories, and the development of concentration and critical thinking skills. The conversation also highlights the role of reading as a model for children and the need to reverse the trend of decreased reading among kids.

        In this conversation, Pam and Sarah discuss strategies for developing a reading habit. They also discuss the concept of 'challenge reads' and the power of books to broaden perspectives.

        Takeaways

        • Reading for pleasure is important for personal joy, relaxation, and emotional growth.
        • Stories have a unique ability to teach and inspire, and reading allows for a deeper engagement with ideas and perspectives.
        • Reading helps develop concentration and critical thinking skills, which are valuable beyond the act of reading itself.
        • Modeling a love for reading is important for children, as it exposes them to new worlds and fosters a lifelong habit.
        • Tips for reading more include having books readily available, creating a dedicated reading space, and setting aside intentional time for reading.
        • Set a daily reading goal and track your progress using a habit tracker or apps like Goodreads.
        • Join a book club to have accountability and engage in discussions about books.
        • Explore different genres and give yourself permission to read what you genuinely enjoy.
        • If a book doesn't capture your interest, feel free to stop reading it or skip to the end to see if it's worth continuing.
        • Consider 'challenge reads' to broaden your perspectives and understand different viewpoints.

          • Links mentioned:

          https://www.thestorygraph.com/

          https://www.goodreads.com/

          55 min
        • How Confirmation and Negativity Biases Are Holding You Back

          In this episode, Pam and Sarah discuss the cognitive biases of negativity bias and confirmation bias. They explain how these biases work together to create a powerful feedback loop, leading to negative thinking and confirmation-seeking behavior. The negativity bias is the tendency to give more weight to negative information, while confirmation bias is the tendency to seek information that confirms pre-existing beliefs. These biases are rooted in evolutionary survival mechanisms and can have a significant impact on our daily lives.

          Takeaways

          • Negativity bias is the tendency to give more weight to negative information, while confirmation bias is the tendency to seek information that confirms pre-existing beliefs.
          • These biases work together to create a powerful feedback loop, leading to negative thinking and confirmation-seeking behavior.
          • The negativity bias is rooted in evolutionary survival mechanisms, as our brains are wired to pay more attention to threats and potential harm.
          • Awareness of these biases can help us recognize and mitigate their impact in our daily lives, leading to more positive and balanced thinking. Negativity bias and confirmation bias can have a significant impact on our thoughts and actions.
          • These biases can stall progress in various areas of life, such as public speaking, creative pursuits, and health goals.
          • Negative feedback can have a lasting impact and hinder personal and professional growth.
          • To mitigate the impact of these biases, it is important to practice mindfulness, seek diverse perspectives, and cultivate a gratitude practice.
          • Challenging automatic thoughts and building awareness are key to counteracting these biases.
            • 48 min
          • The Sunk Cost Fallacy

            In this conversation we explore the concept of sunk cost fallacy, which is the tendency to continue investing resources in something even when it's no longer beneficial. Examples include staying in an unfulfilling job or relationship and continuing to pay for unused memberships or subscriptions.

            Takeaways

            • Sunk cost fallacy is the tendency to continue investing in something even when it's no longer beneficial.
            • Awareness of the sunk cost fallacy can lead to positive outcomes, such as saving money and building resilience.
            • The fear of failure and the desire to maintain self-worth often drive the sunk cost fallacy.
            • By reframing the story and understanding the emotional and fear-based aspects, individuals can break free from the sunk cost trap and embrace change.
              • 43 min
            • The Seven Types of Rest

              In this episode, we discuss the concept of rest and the seven types of rest identified by Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith. The seven types of rest are physical rest, mental rest, spiritual rest, emotional rest, sensory rest, social rest, and creative rest.

              We took the seven types of rest quiz to see where we were deficient. We share our results, ways we're working to address our rest deficits, and offer practical tips for each type of rest. As always, we emphasize the need for self-awareness and self-care.

              Take the quiz here: ⁠https://www.restquiz.com/quiz/rest-quiz-test/⁠

              Watch the TEDx talk here: https://ideas.ted.com/the-7-types-of-rest-that-every-person-needs/

              Takeaways

              • Rest is not just about physical relaxation, but also includes mental, emotional, spiritual, sensory, social, and creative aspects.
              • Self-awareness is key in identifying areas of rest that may be depleted and need attention.
              • Taking breaks and engaging in activities that restore and recharge each type of rest can lead to greater overall well-being.
              • Finding a balance and prioritizing different types of rest can lead to a more fulfilling and balanced life.
              • Surrounding oneself with the right people is crucial for social rest.
              • Finding meaning and purpose is key to achieving spiritual rest.
              • Connecting with nature and practicing mindfulness can contribute to overall rest.

                •  

                46 min
              • How to Respect Your Sleep

                In this episode, Pam and Sarah discuss various strategies and habits for improving sleep quality. They share their different perspectives on sleep and their natural sleep schedules.

                They share their nighttime routines. Sarah's is more traditional with reading, magnesium, and journaling. Pam's is weirder and includes the use of nose strips and mouth tape for better breathing during sleep. They emphasize the importance of establishing a sleep routine and respecting one's sleep needs.

                They also explore the benefits of sunlight exposure in the morning for regulating the circadian rhythm. The conversation covers the role of exercise, supplements, and engaging the brain with specific tasks to aid in falling asleep. Additionally, they provide tips for dealing with middle-of-the-night wakefulness, such as changing location and practicing self-compassion.

                Takeaways

                • Sleep is essential for overall well-being and affects various aspects of life.
                • Everyone has different natural sleep schedules and preferences.
                • Respecting sleep and creating a consistent bedtime routine can improve sleep quality.
                • Avoiding caffeine and alcohol in the evening, lowering the bedroom temperature, and exercising regularly can contribute to better sleep.
                • Personalized nighttime routines can enhance sleep quality.
                • Expose yourself to sunlight in the morning to regulate your circadian rhythm.
                • Incorporate exercise into your morning routine to promote better sleep.
                • Consider supplements if needed.
                • Engage your brain with complex tasks, such as counting or listing items, to help fall asleep. Listen for Pam's "weird trick" for falling asleep.
                • If you experience middle-of-the-night wakefulness, try changing your location and practice self-compassion.
                  • 49 min
                • Is Entrepreneurship Right For You?

                  In this conversation, Pam and Sarah discuss their journeys into self-employment and the differences between being self-employed and having a traditional job.

                  They explore the themes of stability vs. freedom, income predictability, career growth and development, and work-life balance. They highlight the pros and cons of each and provide insights into how to navigate these aspects of entrepreneurship.
                  They discuss finding support and guidance, taking creative urges seriously, networking, and learning as you go.
                  Takeaways
                  -Self-employment offers the freedom to set your own schedule and choose the projects you work on, but it also requires careful financial planning and budgeting.
                  -Both self-employment and traditional jobs offer opportunities for career growth and development, but self-employment allows for more flexibility in pursuing personal interests and learning new skills.
                  -Work-life balance can be challenging in both self-employment and traditional jobs, but setting boundaries and creating a schedule can help maintain a healthy balance.
                  -Each individual's experience with self-employment and traditional jobs will vary, and it's important to choose the path that aligns with your values, goals, and preferences. 
                  -Find a community or mentor who can guide you through starting a business.
                  Take creative urges seriously and take the next right step.
                  -Network with people in different industries to expand your business opportunities.
                  -Start your business and learn as you go, without waiting for perfection.
                  Hire Sarah to coach you through a career shift: https://www.sarahlang.ca/

                  41 min
                • Book Club | Unwinding Anxiety by Dr. Jud Brewer

                  In this conversation, Pam and Sarah discuss anxiety through the lens of the book 'Unwinding Anxiety' by Dr. Jud Brewer. They share their personal experiences with anxiety and how it affects their lives. They explore the concept of anxiety as a habit and the habit loop that reinforces anxious behaviors.

                  They discuss the physical manifestations of anxiety and the role of self-judgment in perpetuating anxiety. They delve into the process of retraining the brain, including awareness, identifying the reward, and practicing mindfulness and curiosity. They explore the concept of interest curiosity and how it can be fostered to reduce anxiety.


                  Takeaways

                  • Anxiety is a common experience that affects everyone to some degree.
                  • Anxiety is a habit that is reinforced by the habit loop of trigger, behavior, and result.
                  • Self-judgment and feelings of guilt can reinforce anxiety habits.
                  • Retraining the brain involves awareness, identifying the reward, and practicing mindfulness and curiosity.
                  • Interest curiosity can help reduce anxiety and foster a sense of openness and enjoyment.
                  • Practicing curiosity and using physical actions like opening the eyes wide can help break the anxiety habit loop.
                  • Anxiety is a part of life, and it is important to accept and navigate it rather than seeking an anxiety-free utopia.


                    • Links:

                    Unwinding Anxiety / Dr. Jud's site

                    CliftonStrengths

                    Pigeon study that turned them into gamblers

                    Sarah's site

                    50 min

                  About A Little Bit Easier

                  From the publisher's feed

                  A Little Bit Easier is a video series by Sarah Lang and Pamela Lund. They met when Pam nearly had a work anxiety-driven breakdown and hired Sarah to coach her through it.