Everyone has things they want, wish for, daydream about. In "Progress", one man dreams of being left in peace while Jake and Nog dream of profit. Meanwhile, dreams come to life a little too well and endanger everything in "If Wishes Were Horses".

Also this week: stupid fads, the worst "Trek" weekend, and our Jake's business pursuits.

[Timestamps: Progress: 01:14; If Wishes Were Horses: 27:41]

DS9 left us in the lurch this week, with two different episodes about conflict resolution of varying quality. First up: an eternal war is being fought by the biggest idiots in the Gamma Quadrant in "Battle Lines". After that, the Chief is dragged into a centuries-old rite to keep a monster at bay while, back on the station, Jake & Nog woo a young ruler as she tries to do right by her people.

Also this week: how many episodes can we compare "Battle Lines" to? What the devil is wrong with Bajor? How successfully can we waffle when we run out of things to say?

Content warning: discussion of rape as a trope in mythology.

[Time Stamps: Battle Lines: 01:36; The Storyteller: 21:52]

Everyone's favorite small business owner is up to his lobes in shenanigans this week! First up, when the Grand Nagus decides to retire and name Quark his heir it paints a target on the back of the bartender's head in "The Nagus"! After that, he stages a robbery that goes awry, kicking off a plot he otherwise features in very little and that gets increasingly convoluted in "Vortex"!

Also this week: forgot the B-plot, Shimmerman helping other short folks, and creative uses for holodecks!

[Timestamps: The Nagus: 01:51; Vortex: 32:22]

Holy Hannah we've hit one-fifty (ignoring various tens-forward and shore leave, shh) and to celebrate, "Trek" has given us...a real pair of stinkers. Damn.

First up, a Starfleet Doctor has someone's consciousness joyriding in their noggin. No, we've not re-watched "The Search for Spock", we were subjected to the utterly obvious "The Passenger". After that, two writers and plenty of research into games still couldn't deliver an episode that rises above mediocre in the infamous "Move Along Home".

Also this week: evil eyeliner, a cake and fish tangent, and record screeches.

Timestamps: Passenger: 02:33; Move Along Home: 33:19

DS9 is feeling a lot like its predecessor this week on SSHB. First up: Q and Vash are in town, and a mysterious artifact from the Gamma Quadrant is causing trouble in "Q-Less". After that, where TNG debated personhood in "Measure of a Man", DS9 tackles where one person ends and another begins in "Dax". But it's not as good. Whoops.

Also this week: all alone, telegraphing twists, and video game adaptations.

Timestamps: Q-Less: 0:52; Dax: 31:17

The Chief plays pivotal roles to varying degrees in DS9 this week. First up: his job as head repairman also makes him patient zero for an aphasia virus in "Babel". After that, he goes full Starfleet when morality and the rules clash in "Captive Pursuit".

Also this week: Tosks, DS9 security is as silly as "Enterprise" security, and worst contact.

Timestamps: Babel: 1:36; Captive Pursuit: 34:40

Knowing where to put your faith when things are at a breaking point can be the difference between life and death this week on DS9. First up: in "Past Prologue" an old comrade of Kira's comes calling, but he's from a faction so violent that even the Bajoran government wants nothing to do with them. Has he really given up the life? After that, an obvious frame-up gives some discontent members of DS9 society an excuse to shake their fellow-denizens belief in Odo in "A Man Alone".

Also this week: here comes Garak, how Keiko met Miles, and don't overthink Odo.

Timestamps: Past Prologue: 2:14; A Man Alone: 27:07

Well, vacation is over. We've got an office to de-prank and a bunch of voicemails to answer, but it means we're back to "Trek"! But not just ANY "Trek"! It's time for "Deep Space Nine", with a slew of new faces, a new premise, and a show where our crew's home is a space station instead of a starship! Meet Commander Sisko and his crew as what looks to be a thankless, middle-of-nowhere diplomatic posting gets a lot more complicated when a stable wormhole is discovered just nearby!

Also this week: no relation, an awful bird, and Odo's sandwich.

Time to make it look like we didn't take anything from the minibar, because our last day of Shore Leave is here. It's time for the "Firefly" movie, "Serenity"! Wait...like the episode? Dangit, "Firefly", there's a page from the "Trek" playbook you SHOULDN'T have taken! Anyway, the Alliance has finally gotten serious about tracking down River, whose head is boiling over with secrets! But who or what is Miranda, and why is the Alliance so desperate to make sure no one figures it out? Grab some fruity oaty bars at the snack bar and settle in!

Also this week: something feels off, Chris won't shut up about clothes, and medical spiders.

Warning: "Mass Effect 2" spoilers from 20:45-20:57

Timestamps: Serenity: 1:03; Firefly wrap up: 1:18:57

It's getting towards the end of vacation, and you know how it is. Suddenly you're trying to cram in so much at once! First up, the show tries to insist more than ever on the Inara/Mal relationship when the "Serenity" crew goes to help an old friend of hers in "Heart of Gold". After that, holy crap the show has figured out what to do with River just in time to end in "Objects in Space!"

Also this week: which one is Mal, toxic masculinity, and objectifying Simon.

SPOILER WARNING: Downton Abbey spoilers (no, really) from 10:27 - 11:04.

Timestamps: Heart of Gold: 2:52; Objects in Space: 35:36