A Widow's Perspective

Time and time again, we hear that a girl’s first love is her father. It’s often said that the father-daughter relationship, whether healthy or strained, lays the foundation for a daughter’s emotional development. A strong bond can shape how she sees herself, influence her relationships with men, and even affect her outlook on life.

But what happens when that bond is tested or begins to weaken?

Join me as we explore the complexities of the father-daughter relationship through a deeply personal lens with author, Ashley Wood. Ashley co-authored a book, This life is Ghetto, with her father, which offers an honest and heartfelt conversation between a father and daughter as they navigate the emotional fallout of divorce and its impact on their relationship.

As people of faith, we often turn to our pastors and spiritual leaders for prayer and support during times of loss, trauma, illness, and other life challenges. But who do pastors turn to when they face similar struggles?

In this episode, we explore how pastors navigate their own personal hardships while continuing to minister to others.

I have known Pastor Mona Steward for most of my life and have witnessed her counsel and support people through some of their most difficult times. Today, we’ll discuss her own journey through the heartbreaking loss of her only daughter, and how she has found strength in the midst of such profound grief.

When a woman gets married, whether it is a big or small wedding, it is the most exciting/life changing day of her life. We look in the eyes of our intended and recite these vows, "to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death.," It is with the intent that our union will last forever. However, according to a report released by the CDC in 2021, 43% of first marriages end in separation or divorce within 15 years.

My guest today is Vernita Ware, founder of a Non-Profit, Still A Rose. Her story is a reminder that you can rise out of dark, hard place, and bloom as a beautiful Rose.

Merriam-Webster dictionary defines Backstory as a story that tells what led up to the main story or plot (as of a film). Growing up in a large extended family was like being in a real-life motion picture. It played out in real time with many lively characters and different storylines. There was love, intrigue, comedy, and prayer. As with any family, the generations struggled at times to understand one another. I have found that the best way to understand someone is to learn about their life experiences and their backstory. Our family is blessed because my mom and her 4 sisters, ages 80-90, are still with us. (During the time of this taping they were between the ages of 87 -77) I had an opportunity to discuss some of their experiences which laid the foundation for the women they are today and for our family history. They're strong, beautiful, wise, funny, and God-fearing women that always have each other’s back. There were six, but five remain—amazing women with shared history but individual stories. Join us as we discuss faith, family, and survival in part two of this two-part episode. 

Merriam-Webster dictionary defines Backstory as a story that tells what led up to the main story or plot (as of a film). Growing up in a large extended family was like being in a real-life motion picture. It played out in real-time with many lively characters and different storylines. There was love, intrigue, comedy, and prayer. As with any family, the generations struggled at times to understand one another. I have found that the best way to understand someone is to learn about their life experiences and their backstory. Our family is blessed because my mom and her 4 sisters, ages 80-90, are still with us. (During the time of this taping they were between the ages of 87 -77) I had an opportunity to discuss some of their experiences which laid the foundation for the women they are today and for our family history. They're strong, beautiful, wise, funny, and God-fearing women that always have each other’s back. There were six, but five remain. Amazing women with shared history but individual stories. Join us as we discuss faith, family, and survival in this two-part episode. 

Bernice Butler, author of “Just Say No, It Takes Just One Step of Faith,” is entering her ninetieth year of life and is still going strong. Her journey included highs and lows but Faith and determination never allowed her to give up. Bernice’s life has impacted not only her family but the community around her. Her lived experiences are an inspiration to anyone who reads or hears her story.  We invite you to join us for a great conversation on surviving life.

We all have expectations about our lives, relationships, and life in general. A hope or belief that something will happen, oftentimes, in our favor. Expectations can define our very existence, which can be problematic if not based on reality. For some, there is a belief that others should be in agreement with what we are expecting to happen and are devastated when the agreement does not happen. Relationships have been destroyed when expectations are not mutual. But what happens when it doesn’t appear that God agrees with our expectations? Join us in a real and relevant conversation with Pastor Patty Lisbon as we discuss, When God’s Will Does Not Meet Our Expectations.

Acceptance in grief doesn’t mean you are ok or in agreement with the loss of your loved one, job, or whatever happened to you. For me, it meant to finally acknowledge the life I envisioned with the one I loved was over. However, there was still life for me to live and I had to figure out how to enjoy it to the fullest. Acceptance doesn’t mean that you forget about the one you love, which I thought I had to do to move forward. I discovered that you could remember, cherish the memories, and move forward. Acceptance is coming to grips with all the emotions of loss, processing the emotions but not allowing the emotions to keep you hostage. Acceptance is your freedom to live life abundantly.

For some people, depression will be a response to grief. The sadness, confusion, and heaviness are just a few of the symptoms. You may not have the energy to get out of bed or handle your basic needs. You may feel stuck. It can be overwhelming. If you can't push through it, or it lasts for a long time, and/or affects your day-to-day activities, seek help from close family or friends, pastoral counseling, or a mental health professional. Your mental health is essential and you are needed.

Disclaimer: I am not a mental health professional, I'm sharing my personal grief journey. For help, contact the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.

Grief is a natural response to loss and a fierce opponent. It can be relentless, show up at inopportune times and can wreak havoc on our physical, emotional and mental well being. However, we are not alone in this struggle. God will deliver and sustain us.  He will not allow us to be consumed.