Adulting and Adrift

In this episode, Thomas and Kihong investigate the underlying dynamics of the so-called “elite” U.S. colleges and the post-college implications of such branding. They share insightful and surprising statistics - hope you enjoy this episode. Please leave comments or share thoughts directly.

We appreciate any reactions. :)

(5:30) By how much did the “elite” colleges expand vs. the rest in the last ~30 years?

(10:00) Scarcity, brand, and satellite campuses

(18:00) Open-sourcing education

(25:00) Financial aid of “elite” colleges

(29:30) The UC system - the one that worked

(33:00) Inequality of education through privatization

(40:00) What a high school senior should really think about

(45:00) The great filtering - life after college

(49:00) Why Kihong wanted to do this episode so much

If you want to learn more about this topic through different channels, check out:

Freakonomics -

Episode 500: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6R2fvzdzmLRi3THmiWMY6U?si=1919a3b90249453d

Episode 501: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5mDKTQ6iuiUg59Ghev2WOf?si=fae3dc4252a64546

Episode 502: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5eV24SuhVG9NFP2bnzvibf?si=e7bb77861bb34725

Episode 503: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6kBXTSJQcDaObF0QmwOAYG?si=b8442a1cd73e4cc9

Malcom Gladwell on elitism, dining, and colleges: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0sB5WgKiAyvFkkecvItEki?si=521680c3aa2a4c5e

Operation Varsity Blues: The College Admissions Scandal

(0:00) Intro - brief overview of each of our backgrounds

(5:43) Defining religion and spirituality

(8:00) Positive/attractive aspects of religion

(17:50) Doubts, cognitive biases, critiques of religion

(41:46) Faith, spirituality, meditation, ethics

(49:10) Question for Kihong: What value do you see in religion, spirituality, and meditation?

(1:04:55) Discussing the play "A Case for the Existence of God"

Thomas and Kihong explores everything about friendship - what defines friendship, what helps people be good friends, how does it evolve over time? How do you navigate?

(02:00) How do you define friendship? What is the best way to approach it?

(14:00) What makes people become friends? Our stories and the element of chance

(22:30) Is there such a thing as a best friend? Different levels of friendship?

(33:00) Loneliness vs. Solitude

(45:00) Connecting people, cultivating relationships, building a community, overcoming your fear

(56:00) How friends influence your views and lifestyle?

(01:12:00) Can a boy and a girl be friends? Controversial topic

(01:23:00) How do you repair the relationship after arguing with a friend?

We also started a YouTube channel!! Please search Adulting and Adrift, or click on this link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwL37EJNB3hFColLCcQsQJQ

(03:00) Our own histories with money

(15:10) Money and status: fashion, music, and everything

(19:10) Boomers vs. Gen Z narrative

(35:10) Personal finance: Thomas’ story

(49:10) Kihong’s journey with personal finance

(01:06:10) Budgeting!

(01:10:00) Credit scores and closing out

(00:00) Highlights + Intro

(04:00) Andie’s childhood and how she ended up at a boarding school

(17:15) The application process

(25:00) First day of school and the importance of luck

(30:30) Academics: the challenges; how to design your experience

(40:10) Interacting with faculty as an Asian person

(45:50) Designing life beyond boarding school, finding her true passions

(50:00) Thomas on the shortcomings of what is taught as success in boarding schools

(54:00) Posturing and systemic privilege

(01:02:00) Life after boarding school and what Andie is looking forward to in 2024

(01:04:50) Would you send your kid?

(00:00) Highlights

(02:30) Intro

(05:30) Childhood, family, and sibling dynamics

(21:50) Kihong's experiences

(42:00) Being deliberate about little choices as parents

(45:00) Rewards and punishments: a legitimate system of teaching children?

(1:00:00) Why it’s so dangerous for parents to not communicate

(1:04:00) Thomas talks about “training”

(1:19:00) Kihong on South Korea’s low birth rate and the meaning of family

(1:25:30) Thomas on the responsibilities and duties as a parent

(0:00) Introduction and Holidays Update

(5:00) Today’s Topic: Job and Career

(6:20) As a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

(12:55) How did you end up in your current career trajectory? - Thomas

(26:30) How did you end up in your current career trajectory? - Kihong

(32:45) Finding a job based on passion, impact, and/or financial security

(38:30) Work-life balance across industries and academia

(49:30) What does your future trajectory look like?

(1:34) Importance of thoughts

(7:30) Importance of mental fortitude against criticism

(13:00) Importance of rest

(00:00) Intro - Kihong’s explanation on why he chose this book to discuss and the impact

(02:40) Who was Dale Carnegie?

(07:00) Part 1 Discussion

(09:00) Kihong’s own experience of worry on health, Discussion of Part 2

(00:50) Intro

(02:45) Asian-American or Asian and American

(5:30) Thomas’ story: Born in US, grew up in Japan as a mixed race person

(22:20) Kihong’s story: Asian lunchbox

(26:00) Navigating through different friend groups

(28:00) Different cultural values and priorities - how they impacted our lives

(33:50) Speaking up for yourself and apologizing less

(38:20) Asian representation in media and its impact

(42:30) Kihong’s take on the late Korean culture’s popularity and the relatively short history of Asian immigration

(45:45) Thomas on the Last Samurai

(53:30) Asian names, Western conventions, and representation in science

(1:01:13) "Model minority": the danger of narratives and expectations

(1:11:00) Wrapping up