🌈 Welcome to episode, "144: Coming Out Later in Life: Pride Month, Gender Identity, Sexual Orientation, Authenticity, Religious Trauma, Shame, and Finding the Courage to Be Yourself," with Katie Ziskind.
What happens when you've spent years—or even decades—trying to be the "good wife," the "good husband," the perfect parent, the devoted church member, or the successful professional, while secretly hiding an important part of who you are?
In this heartfelt Pride Month episode of All Things Love and Intimacy, therapist and host Katie Ziskind, LMFT, CSTIP, explores the emotional journey of coming out later in life, navigating sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression, and the profound impact of shame, religious trauma, purity culture, and societal expectations.
Whether you identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, pansexual, demisexual, sapiosexual, transgender, nonbinary, gender-fluid, or a man who cross dresses, this episode offers compassionate insight into what it feels like to carry a hidden identity while trying to meet the expectations of family, marriage, religion, and culture.
Katie discusses the history and meaning of Pride Month, the difference between sexual orientation, gender identity, and gender expression, and why so many people suppress their authentic selves for years. She explores how internalized shame can contribute to anxiety, depression, perfectionism, people-pleasing, workaholism, pornography addiction, alcoholism, emotional affairs, infidelity, and avoidance patterns.
This episode also addresses the painful reality of discovering your identity while in a long-term marriage. What happens when a spouse realizes later in life that they are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, or have been hiding a cross-dressing identity? How can secrecy lead to betrayal trauma? How can both partners find healing, compassion, and understanding?
You'll learn about:
🌈 Brief history of Pride Month and the Stonewall movement
🌈 Coming out later in life
🌈 LGBTQ+ identities and terminology
🌈 Cross dressing, gender expression, and self-acceptance
🌈 Religious trauma and purity culture recovery
🌈 Shame, guilt, and internalized homophobia or transphobia
🌈 Betrayal trauma in marriage and relationships
🌈 The emotional impact of hiding your authentic self
🌈 Why people stay in the closet for decades
🌈 Healing from conservative gender role expectations
🌈 Building self-compassion and authenticity
🌈 Therapy for LGBTQ+ individuals, couples, and families
As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Sex Therapy Informed Professional, Gottman Level Two trained couples therapist, and Complex PTSD specialist, Katie brings warmth, empathy, and clinical expertise to conversations about sexuality, intimacy, relationships, trauma recovery, and self-acceptance.
If you are struggling with questions about your identity, feeling trapped between authenticity and obligation, healing from religious shame, navigating a mixed-orientation marriage, exploring your gender expression, or supporting a loved one through their coming-out journey, this episode is for you.
You deserve a life where you do not have to hide.
You deserve relationships where you can be known.
You deserve to feel proud of who you are.
🎙️ All Things Love and Intimacy Podcast with Katie Ziskind
Work with Katie Ziskind: Individual therapy, LGBTQ+ affirming counseling, cross-dressing counseling, gender identity exploration, sexuality counseling, marriage therapy, betrayal trauma recovery, and intensive therapy retreats in Florida and Connecticut.
Start at www.WisdomWithinCt.com