I’m back for another solo episode today after a little bit of a summer break. I gathered some of your most common questions from my workshops, coaching sessions, and social media comments. In this episode I’m walking you through a few of the struggles that share a common thread and giving insight into what makes these things difficult for parents and how to work through them.

Kids Who Don’t Like Losing

• There are a lot of triggers for parents that come along with having a child who doesn’t like to lose which can cause eggshell parenting.
• When your child struggles to deal with something like disappointment or frustration, the answer is always that they need to experience it more often.
• Your reaction to their emotions as a parent is so important. Staying regulated in the moment will help deescalate the situation.
• Lectures don’t work. You’re helping them learn the life skill of tolerating frustration and managing the emotions that come with the frustration. 

Public Outbursts

• We sense all of the people in a public situation and it usually feels much more judgmental in our minds than it actually is because of insecurities. 
• When our ability to parent is tethered to our child’s behavior, it makes things very difficult.
• Make an action plan and practice getting cooperation at home so your child is prepared when you do a test run in public. 
• Set your kids up for success so you aren’t trying to complete tasks when they’re already over tired, hungry, etc.

PARR 

• This was created for anyone who needs to work through managing their own emotions and reactions. 
• Pausing is an important reminder that we can take the time to slow down and not make rapid fire decisions in the moment.
• Always reflect on “what does my child need at this moment?” You know your child best and can better understand their needs when you have paused.

When Your Kids Don’t Listen

• We rely on the idea that if our kids have the knowledge, they will react or behave appropriately. This simply isn’t true because their brains aren’t developed in this way yet.
• Kids are wondering “what happens when…” and they are curious what the outcome will be on the other side of their behavior. 
• Once they know the action that is paired with your language is consistent, they will start listening better.
• We need to remember kids are simple and we usually overcomplicate things.

Resources: 

Getting Your Kids to Listen the First Time You Ask Workshop: https://www.theparentingreframe.com/shop/p/getting-your-kids-to-listen-the-first-time-you-ask 

Four Reaction Types Podcast Episode: https://theparentingreframe.simplecast.com/episodes/beyond-good-or-bad-the-3-parental-reaction-blueprints

Schedule a free call about my 1:1 coaching, Reclaim Your Calm - https://www.theparentingreframe.com/coaching

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