Check the hat and glasses;

Yeap,

That's a bampheramph laughin at you

Not with you

Highly unusual and peculiar, sure

Dad hats: the lowest level of bampheramph—

These bamphers show you what not to do, how not to act, and just how not to be in general

After bampheramph camp, the graduates are ranked by performance —typically— “bad” “very bad” or “what the fuck”, and very rarely even “what the fuck, dude” or “I don't even know”, the average graduate being given the “Classicl bampheramph” status, and typically wear “dorky sun hats” regardless of location, placement, or time of year

Reserve bamphers may wear backwards snap backs after once having served as captain; other reserve bampheramphs may present SnapBack forwards or even sideways, before having served as captain or during service as captain, if any other hat is not needed or called for

The motherfuckers, a special branch of bampheramphs dedicated specifically to

DJs

The 7 aliases

7 alieses

5 Guys

Two Dudes

Codename.Blū.

c o l o r s.

Happy Accidents

Dillon Francis is atop the roof at the Wynn/Encore, preparing to meet his untimely death.

Dillon Hart Francis! You come down from there this instant!

He looks below to the Las Vegas strip, a bustling blur of lights and traffic.

DILLON!

Chak Chel

Let him jump.

Chak Chel!

What! Let ‘em.

Chak Chel, come on!

The Little Motherfuckers are—

Well—

A group of young children are causing a ruckus on their bicycles. None of them are wearing helmets—of course—eventually to become motherfuckers

Smells like fire to the west

Yes, I still have eyes for you

I guess there's still some time between us

Guess I still have ties to you

Do my eyes deceive me or

Is this make believe

Believe me

All I see is you, sometimes

Even— especially in my dreams

I keep your secrets,

I feel scared when your hands touch my hands

But feel good when my lips touch your lips

I feel sad when your heart touch my heart—

I feel love with your hands on my hips,

I'll be getting it all done and over with, for the most part

Give me a call,

When you're all done, at the mortuary

I'm so sorry

I'd bend over backwards, for you

Even eat meat, if you told me too

Or cheese, Jesus

You'd better believe it

Mission impossible

Even stevens

The rest of the things

As seen on TV

The rest of the evening.

My ex fucked me up so bad

I might never be right again

He used to say l”I'm a champion”

He was a loser—

He punched me in the face so hard, I actually apologized for it.

He decked me out.

Not once—

But like 5 times.

In a ROW.

Teeth went through my lip and everything

Came out on the other side,

I was like

“Oh, awesome I was thinking about getting a piercing—

Now I don't have to!

Saved me $30 and the cost of saline!

Phew.

Fucked me up.

To this day if I see you in champion sportswear, I am immediately convinced you're an idiot.

No take backs.

If I see you in champion sportswear,

I just automatically assume you're stupid

Not sorry.

Oh well.

If I see you wearing champion sportswear,

I just assume you're a lazy, retarded idiot.

*shrugs* not my fault.

I wear Nike.

—but it I see you in white Nikes that are supposed to be white, but they're all dirty and gross and caked in whatever—

I'm just gonna assume you're a fat dirty asshole that's gonna punch me in the face,

And walk away.

Clean your shoes!

Lol I'm so fucked up

lil biiiiiiiittzzzzz.

YOU GAVE DILLON FRANCIS YOUR NAME?!

no!

Well thank god

I gave Dillon Francis your name.

ARE YOU CRAZY

No. But he is!

Exactly!

{Enter The Multiverse}

[The Festival Project.™]

COPYRIGHT © THE FESTIVAL PROJECT 2023

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. ©

-U.