Chat with Dr. Kat

Are You Being Selfish Without Realizing It? These Everyday Habits Say Yes


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In this episode, Dr. Kat explores the small, everyday habits that might be undermining your relationships. From how you handle the grocery cart to how you react when someone sets a boundary, these “invisible” behaviors can silently erode trust and connection.

If you’ve ever been called inconsiderate, controlling, or self-centered — or if you’ve felt like someone else was acting that way toward you — this conversation will give you the language, insight, and tools to see the behavior more clearly and shift it.

Topics include:

  • The psychology behind subtle selfishness
  • The emotional impact of thoughtless routines
  • How to build self-awareness without shame
  • What “emotional maturity” actually looks like in daily life

Dr. Kat helps you rethink the difference between intent and impact — and why personal growth starts with noticing what you didn’t before.

Episode Chapters:

00:00 – Intro: The Invisible Ways We’re Selfish
Dr. Kat opens with how small behaviors reveal unconscious selfishness.

00:57 – Example 1: The Grocery Cart Test
A simple act shows how much we expect others to clean up after us.

04:40 – Example 2: Changing Lanes
How thoughtless driving reflects deeper disregard for others.

07:03 – Example 3: Cap Off the Toothpaste
Daily habits that signal “my comfort matters more than yours.”

09:57 – Example 4: Parking Spots
What your parking choices say about your awareness of others.

11:19 – Personal Story: Taking Responsibility
Kat shares how owning her actions shifted a dynamic in real time.

13:59 – Take Opportunities to Be Kind
A call to break selfish patterns through small, mindful kindness.

18:22 – Reach Out at ChatWithDrKat.com
Share your story or suggest a topic at chatwithdrkat.com.

I want to hear from you! To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/

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Chat with Dr. KatBy Dr. Kat Derrig-Palumbo