“Tone is the hardest part of saying no.”    ― Jonathan Price, Put That in Writing

You gotta say NO to some things in order to say YES to other things. It's just a slightly more clever way to express the truth of setting priorities.

Some priorities are easy. God, then family. Well, it's easy mentally, but it's more challenging in reality sometimes. Saying God is first - where He deserves and demands to be - is different than actually putting God first.

Matthew 6:33

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”

Matthew 10:38-39

“And anyone who does not take up his cross and follow Me is not worthy of Me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.”

Matthew 22:37-40

"And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”

Exodus 20:3

“You shall have no other gods before me.”

Proverbs 3:5-6

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make straight your paths."

Putting God first isn't politically correct, but putting family first often is. That's always seemed odd to me. Not that I don't love my family, but my family - nobody's family - is nearly as powerful, as helpful, as worthy...as God. If you're gonna come in second only to God, that seems a pretty lofty position.

Family is important, but we often make declarations we don't back up with our actions. Like Walter White on Breaking Bad, we can often declare we're doing it for our family, but the thing we do damages our family. Self-deception is easy. Facing reality, especially when it's contrary to what we most want to believe, is hard.

If setting priorities were easy then there'd be no books, articles, podcasts, seminars, or courses on time management. Time management advice is ridiculously basic. Create a to-do list, prioritize things, establish deadlines or time frames to get the thing done, avoid distractions and establish a routine. Paypal me $1,000 and consider yourself trained in time management.

The hard part is establishing the priorities - figuring out what's most important. Maybe avoiding distractions is hard, too. But nothing is as difficult as figuring out what matters most right now. God matters. Family, too. Yet, when my tire blows out - a stupid tire becomes the priority. Yes, it's a very brief - momentary - priority, but nothing else much matters until I get that tire replaced. It doesn't mean God takes a back seat. Or that my wife no longer matters.

If a blown tire can disrupt my overarching life priorities, then it's easy for me to understand how hard it may be to figure out other things that take up my time. And it may be time I no longer need to devote to a thing. Maybe it's time to say, "No."

Flow. Zone. Element.

Terms synonymous with that place where our natural aptitude and what we most love intersect. A third point of intersection is usually in play, too - success. I don't find any of these 3 easy to figure out. Let's think about it.

What are you naturally good at? Finding out our natural aptitude seems like it'd be easy, but I've not found it easy at all. I suspect that may be a personal problem. ;)

Maybe it's not the wisest way to view things, but for me, it's easier to think about what I'm able to do easily. Mostly because I enjoy it. That doesn't mean I'm good at it. It can be easy to do something poorly even if you enjoy it.