💭 What I’m thinking about

I am definitely a planner. I like to know what’s going to happen when and I’ve gotten comfortable with the why behind that — I like to be in control.

But some of the best things happen when you are not in control, when you’re surprised, or you have no expectations. And I love surprises! But I have high expectations typically, and I like to be in control.

So how do I shed the planner in me and become more spontaneous?

(💡 Tips are definitely welcome, please share!)

I’ve gone through phases of releasing myself from the required doing (having an alarm, a schedule of workouts, meal planning) and tried to just BE, but for me, that feels chaotic and I lose track of my goals or doing things that make me feel good, but maybe I don’t love doing (i.e. working out).

As I’ve been in this space of thinking about spontaneity, I’ve also been off Instagram (which has been good) but have found myself getting addicted to other forms of social media (enter Twitter and YouTube Shorts… I know, I know — who watches YouTube Shorts?!).

When I don’t know what I want to do and don’t have anything planned, I hop into a social media hole and am inundated with other people’s opinions, activities, and thoughts.

🙅This is not good.

This makes it harder and harder for me to ask myself “what do you want right now?” and because it’s hard, I just return back to my hole and get silently yelled at by more people.

Then the yelling turns into should.

“Oh, I should get pizza because I just saw a photo of pizza.”

“Eh, I should really have a salad because that’s healthy.”

“Gah, I should get out of the apartment and try a new restaurant!”

All of these are rooted in someone else’s actions, and not my own thoughts or desires.

Whether or not you think your own thoughts and desires are even real (cough cough mimetic desire) is another thing, but alas. I want the wants to come from me, and not a picture or video on a tiny screen. I want more spontaneity that comes from me, and not from others.

🤔 A question for you

Last time you were spontaneous? Ready, set, go.

🤸

Or just tips for being spontaneous! Just reply to this email.

💖 Something a lil fun

I started working with a trainer in Austin (hi Brad!) early this year and had to leave the gym when I moved to Florida, which was very sad. I’ve found my gym fam (lol) at F45, but have never felt as consistent or strong when it comes to weights since I worked with Brad.

I saw Brad for a workout this week since I’m Austin, and he mentioned he enjoyed my newsletters. 🤗 It was just the nudge I needed to come back to the keyboard and drop a few thoughts. Thanks Brad!

🎵 A song for you

A vibe. Nothing else to say here.

And here’s the playlist.

Do something spontaneous this week,

Zoë

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