Ask A Bitchface

Costarring Puffin, but not in her life jacket.

Just so everyone has a picture in their mind when we talk about her. She was like your kid sister or your cousin, normal and loved and she is missed.

The part about Abby that struck me was that she didn’t hold a bias toward women in domestic abuse situations. She literally just rolled in with a fresh attitude and tried to help them, every single time. Sometimes that is difficult for me to do, and I literally live and breathe this shit.

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The other part is, she wasn’t taking this dudes shit. She knew he was controlling; she knew she was through. Because she embarrassed him by not sleeping with him, by making it known they weren’t together on this trip, his giant fucking ego had to have the last laugh.

I know men like this. I know y’all do because y’all have told me about them. We’ve discussed this shit, many, many times. It could have been one of us, it wasn’t any different because she was a cop. It just meant he already had the gun because he was a cop too.

If you see red flags, heed them. Don’t be polite because your momma made you wear a slip and tights and say yes ma’am. Go ahead and back out of the date, cancel the movie night, whatever. Call it quits and don’t feel bad because they never feel bad when they murder us.

Even then, there are no guarantees, so if you’re ever stuck, afraid and you need to get out, you know the drill. I’ll Uber you to the shelter or a hotel for the night right now. This moment. No questions. I have been solid on that for 5 years, and I plan to be ten toes down 5 more. Get at a Bitchface if you need a way out. I got you, sis.

Grady is going to hear my name every day until he agrees to talk with us.

Also, no means

The rundown? FaceMRI, Abby got a feature piece, The Ghost Dog, possible serial killer in my laundry room, and look out for dogs and sasquatches.

First, if I’m doing a voiceover for a column, it’s because I am mad enough to add a subtext. Enjoy.

Today, I was reading an article on women’s safety in Turkey. For many of us, myself included, we don’t think of Turkey when we think of the places where it just isn’t safe to be a woman. Stop right there.

So far this year 71 women have been killed in Turkey, including seven on Feb. 27 — the highest known number of such killings there on a single day.

The WWSF secretary general, Fidan Ataselim, attributed the killings to deeply patriarchal traditions in the majority Muslim country and to a greater number of women wishing to leave troubled relationships. Others want to work outside the home.

Yes, murdered because they want to leave bad and abusive relationships. Or because they want a job, probably to leave to bad and abusive relationships. It seems like I’ve heard some of this before, but I’m not sure where…

Tell me if anything in this next part sounds familiar.

The president's decision came after pressure from Islamic groups and some officials from Erdogan’s Islam-oriented party. They argued that the treaty was inconsistent with conservative values, eroded the traditional family unit and encouraged divorce.

Erdogan has said he believes that men and women were not biologically created as equals and that a woman’s priority should be her family and motherhood.

Family and motherhood as a priority? Isn’t that a platform here? That’s right, the Family First bitches, aka, Moms for Liberty, aka, Assholes with Casseroles. Oh, and their friends the MAGA’s. And those Trumpers. Wasn’t that the shit they claimed they believed in when they stripped our autonomy?

That’s absolutely what they said. It’s the bullshit they tried to sell us. Are we waiting until they do us like Turkey before we do something about this? I really don’t feel that’s in our best interest.

Listen, I’m all for women having families, and getting married, and being homemakers, if that’s what you want. But, if you don’t, nobody should be able to shame you or force you. Not the government, or the church, or the fucking PTA.

We need to have a long look at those trying to take our options away. Like, someone who has his porn usage monitored by his teenager to help him ‘resist temptation’. Or a “conservative woman” wanting your autonomy stripped giving handies in a musical audience. Or another so called “conservative woman” who was banging her trainer but has the audacity to try to take your right to healthcare and no-fault divorce.

I’m not saying the left isn’t questionable, but damn, bitch, think about it. Do you want to have 8 kids and try to tell me your uterus is still intact? Because Bitch I know you’re lying to me. Get your shit together and demand better. While we still have a voice.

That’s all the Womens’ Day I have in me.

I love y’all. Be well.

The one about The Marine.