The Rangers think a superspreader event is a great way to welcome Opening Day, while the rest of the ballparks plan to welcome a small number of fans back to the stands. The Commissioner uses the minors as his own private laboratory to try out a huge number of new rules in advance of CBA negotiations.

Shortstop, conqueror of the Durham Bull, and Pookie’s pal Willy Adames is Pottymouth’s Rays boyfriend for this season.  Gavin Lux, the Dodger’s 2B with the heart in the shape of a baseball fills out her middle infield. Third baseman, conqueror of Aroldis Frickin’ Chapman, and non-draftee Mike Brosseau is Patti’s guy on the Rays. Catcher Will Smith, the Fresh Prince of LAD, caps off her boyfriend picks for the season.

Opening Day festivities in the CPBL included six mascots, from rainbows to the scales of justice to one who is just, um, pink. Here’s how to watch the games. Please take a spin through the best of MLB’s school picture day.  Steak comes up more than you’d think.

Wash your hands, wear your masks, watch your distance, get your vaccine as soon as you can, and fight the man. Find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.