Welcome to the Water Closet feeding frenzy. Our bellies are filled with joke-meat and license plates. This week: Brian finally reads a business book classic, and his Description of it makes us all want to be Jerk Dad. Bobby is concerned that Steven Seagal is in a real-life descent into madness, and Netflix is just filming it. Allen feels shame when Brian goes dad-mode, and embarrasses him with stories of old RPG characters. Mr. Seagal, if you’re listening to this, we’re writing that feel-good teacher movie, just for you.