When did living your life start feeling like something you were supposed to document?
Somewhere along the way, we stopped just taking the trip, cooking the meal, enjoying the hobby, going to the concert, having the opinion, or experiencing the moment.
Now there's a little voice in the back of our heads asking:
Should I post this?
And listen, I'm a podcaster complaining about people turning their lives into content. The irony isn't lost on me.
But I don't think sharing is the problem.
Humans have always shared stories. We've always shown our friends the things we made, passed around photographs, recommended the stuff we loved, and searched for other weirdos who cared about the same things we did.
Something else changed.
And somewhere between “Dude, you gotta see this” and “Don't forget to like and subscribe,” I think we lost something worth finding again.
So this week, we're talking about the imaginary audience that follows us everywhere, why every hobby suddenly needs a business plan, the difference between sharing a life and performing one, and why maybe the most rebellious thing you can do in 2026 is have an incredible experience...
and tell absolutely nobody.
Be here now.
Oh.
And stick around after the episode.
There's something we need to talk about.
A pretty big something, actually.
And do you want to go a little deeper into some of the research mentioned in this episode? Here are the receipts behind the rabbit hole.
How Recommendation Algorithms Learn What We Want
YouTube explains that its recommendation system uses a variety of signals to personalize what viewers see, including watch history, search history, subscriptions, likes and dislikes, “Not interested” feedback, and satisfaction signals.
The important distinction for our conversation: the platforms aren't simply showing everyone the same internet. Our behavior helps teach recommendation systems what should be placed in front of us next.
Source:
YouTube Help - Learn more about how YouTube works for you
YouTube's recommendation-system documentation
How TikTok Builds the “For You” Feed
TikTok similarly describes the For You feed as a personalized recommendation system. User interactions, including what people watch, like, share, comment on, or skip help influence future recommendations, alongside information about the content itself and other signals.
In other words: watch one weird thing and suddenly your phone may decide...
Ah. This is who you are now.
Sources:
TikTok — How TikTok recommends content
TikTok Newsroom — How TikTok recommends videos #ForYou
Likes as Social Rewards
The idea that Likes can function as social rewards isn't just something Nate pulled out of his ass.
Research published in Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience has examined how giving and receiving positive feedback through social media interacts with neural systems associated with reward and social processing.
Other research has also found evidence that people's social-media behavior can follow principles of reward learning: social rewards such as Likes can influence how frequently people post.
Which makes the basic feedback loop we discussed in the episode considerably less metaphorical:
Do thing → receive social reward → behavior is reinforced.
Further Reading:
National Library of Medicine — What the brain “Likes”: neural correlates of providing feedback on social media
Nature Communications — A computational reward learning account of social media engagement
A Note About “Feeding the Algorithm”
One bit of useful nuance: algorithms aren't necessarily demanding that creators sacrifice every waking moment to the content gods.
YouTube's own creator guidance emphasizes finding a sustainable balance between consistency and maintaining well-being rather than simply uploading as much as humanly possible.
Which is particularly funny considering this episode about being present and not allowing content to consume your life was itself delayed because...
life happened.
Sometimes the episode can wait.
Source:
YouTube Help — Upload schedule tips
These sources are provided for listeners who want to follow the rabbit hole beyond the episode. As always, don't take Nate's word for it.
Read. Question. Check the receipts. Come to your own conclusions.Join The Lobby
If this episode made you laugh, think, feel personally attacked by your own camera roll, or reconsider turning your next sandwich into a seven-part vertical video series then come hang out with us in The Lobby, the Average Joe Nerdcast community on Discord.
Link to the Group: https://discord.gg/Q5X3MFVx2
This show has always been about finding our people: movie nerds, gamers, book girlies and book bros, 90s kids, history nerds, conspiracy debunkers, lore addicts, and anybody else who has ever said:
“Okay, hear me out...”
Join the conversation, share what you're nerding out about, pitch rabbit holes for future episodes, and help us build a little corner of the internet where curiosity and critical thinking are still alive and well.
And if you've enjoyed the show, like and subscribe on YouTube, ring the bell, follow Average Joe Nerdcast on your podcast platform of choice, and leave a rating or review. It genuinely helps other Average Joes find the show.
Here's to the first hundred.
Now let's make 101.
Stay Gold. Nerd Bold.
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