Back Row Seating

*not Elementals

It's time to check out the Pixar answer to Zootopia, with elementals battling social issues and generational trauma rather than animals. This time, though, we have Monstera heads, kitschy Irish-themed shirts, and oddly alarming relationship cues, so surely nothing could wrong, right?

Turns out the antagonists were the friends we made along the way all along :')

or "That Atlantis movie when Disney was making unique 2D animation".

We're hitting up my childhood once again, rediscovering the joys of this film like 1914 people rediscovering Atlantis. A wonderful cast of memorable characters and legit attention to proto-language details will definitely lend to cult hit status, but will it meet my adult standards?

Let's find out!

Oooh, boy! Time to finally see the "bathtub scene"!

On the heels of an insane rise to internet fame for its weirdness, it's time for me to check out 'Saltburn' and see what all the hubbub is about. As an aficionado of weird films, I'm all here for it! Certainly nothing will make me uncomfortable, right?

*There are some audio issues for the first nine minutes or so, but it's fine afterwards :)

Another glorious summer. It makes me sick...

Fortunately, autumn is fast approaching, except in Texas, but I hear it's the most wonderful time of the year up in the Northeast U.S.! So why not bring along a true Bostonian to school us in the ways of leaf peeping and witchcraft?

The magical tome of spells in question? Well, I've never seen Hocus Pocus beyond the scores of branded t-shirts and craft supplies that flood retail stores in October, so how about we give it a shot!

Then my coworkers won't be so revolted by my 'not seen' list :')

It's time to hop into the way-way-back machine and hop into another Paul Thomas Anderson romp through the 1970's! only this time, it's spearheaded by my longtime film-nemesis, Mark Wahlberg... That said, there's an all-star cast surrounding this young lad, so perhaps it won't be too hard to watch; we already know PTA's soundtrack and atmosphere will be on point.

Surely we won't see Markie Mark's o-face or anything; that would be weird!

Fresh off the heels of, like, two different studios, Disney wanting nothing to do with this, Nimona finally graces our eyeballs after being rescued by Annapurna and Netflix! Two or three years or waiting, and I am totally here for it!

A little anti, and a little hero, I'm all kinds of ready for Nimona's energy. How about you? Get your transmog hats on; it's time to get metal!

This episode has a very high level of badness for its size. We'll have to fix that, with abnormal dialogue about alien taxonomy! but, really, this movie is about family, which not even Gantu is stronger than. Straight from that soft spot of my childhood comes, perhaps, my favorite Disney film -along with Hercules, Hunchback, Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast (all number one, duh)- brings a ton of great memories, and certainly one of the best animated characters in history. So let's check it out again and get in touch with our inner city-destroying experiment!

Oh, childhood. When things were so innocent, and before we hit ludicrous speed into adulthood. Back with a vengeance from my brother and my childhoods is Spaceballs the Movie! a wonderfully all-ages adventure through Mel Brooks' Star Wars parody. Join my brother and I as we sleepily recount this staple of our childhood, and hope we don't get captured by Pizza the Hut before the ending.

If you read the description for the Van Helsing episode, and you also know better, you might know that TheDeadedNeko made a fool of me... Well, now it's time for my retribution! Going into this with zero clue as to what we're watching, watch as our Neko friend is terrified to learn that we're watching four old ladies thirsting over Tom Brady for an hour and a half, with Guy Fieri! Well, now that I think about it, this punishment might have backfired...

Once more, into the branch! or breach. Definitely the Whomping Willow. We return to the wizarding world of Hogwarts with two new guests, and find the universe to be far more dark and harrowing than the previous two entries. What gives? Well, Alfonso Cuarón happened, and sweet, sneaky murder happened, at least toward Lily and James Potter. Between that and ratatouille being cooked, what else awaits our unsuspecting viewers?! Come along for the ride and find out!