In this episode I explore a core idea from Bioenergetics: how early developmental trauma can create deep “either/or” splits inside us — patterns that live in the body and run automatically before we have time to think.

One example: if a baby experiences rejection (or interprets it as rejection), a survival-level split can form — I can either survive… or express my needs. Not both. 

And later in life, that old fear can hijack present-day situations, triggering defenses that try to protect us — but often create the very outcome we fear.

We look at:

- why these patterns can feel like “this is just who I am”

- how defensive loops get activated faster than conscious thought

- how mindfulness and inner noticing can create that tiny space where choice becomes possible

- why learning the patterns matters — and why it can be hard to access the knowledge through classic Bioenergetics texts

I also share what I’ve been building lately: BIG Companion — a personalized, pattern-aware guide you can add to your AI to help you prepare for difficult conversations, understand what happened after things go sideways, and find calmer, clearer ways to repair and reconnect.

BIG = Bioenergetics + Imago + Giraffe Language (Nonviolent Communication)  

— translated into small steps and ready-to-use prompts, so you don’t need to know the theory.

Explore BIG Companion here:

https://basiapiechocinska.com/big-companion-clarity-and-calm-for-real-life-relationships/

If you have comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  

And if you’d like to support more episodes, you can sponsor me on:

https://www.patreon.com/basia

In the previous episode we noted that merely focusing on practicing the mutually beneficial win-win situations will not fulfil our longing for meaning and connection. Thus it may not be sufficient to move us out of an increasingly addictive world, where all we have are fast pleasure hits provided by addictively designed food or social media.

What is more satisfying than the currently addictive model of society? The key to this question has been presented to us for thousands of years in all sorts of mystical traditions.  Here we look at chapter 38 of the 2500 year old "Tao Teh Ching" by Lao Tzu, translated by Hua-Ching Ni.

We also look at what it predicts will happen, step by step, if one is not in touch with ones inner essence. And we look at what it suggests one do to find a way of living aligned with all, so that kindness is natural and the win-win interactions become beautiful and satisfying.

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me, do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

Narratives are stories that we give power when we believe in them.
They may originate in traumas, developmental traumas and this form our personalities, telling us who we are.
They may come from our society and be partially factual or fictional.
By moving beyond our current identity we can loosen the grip they have on us.
This move will also tend to move us beyond just mutually beneficial exchanges, where we exchange one thing for another, into deeply meaningful and satisfying interactions.

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me, do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

Beauty with capital B is like God with capital G - inexplicable.  And yet, there is so much to say.

It is our essence.  It is one part of the trinity of our essence: Beauty, Consciousness, Love.
Beauty is related to one of the fundamental ways in which we experience, in particular through perception.  It is tied to Being. Moving away from our wholeness we move into separation, and it becomes more and more difficult to find beauty in all form, though it is its essence.

We also talk about Consciousness and how it is tied to our awareness, our thoughts and our sequential sense of time.
And we mention how Love provides us a direction and dynamics and is the essence of all feelings.  When moving into separation it becomes fear.

We also talk about Art being able to move us closer to Beauty, and thus closer to our essence and talk about the idea that the purpose of Art is to reveal Beauty. 

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me, do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

The idea of moving from Beauty can be accessed through all we do but is perhaps easier to find through dance.

When we move from Beauty we act from an expanded sense of self and a larger perspective.  We act from love, instead of acting from fear.

By letting go, opening up, becoming present, receiving and inviting in the moment we can let Beauty build up in us until it becomes almost inevitable for us to move from it.  Then we move in service to it and it becomes of benefit to all. 

Practicing moving from Beauty can be deeply transformative and profoundly meaningful, and is, unsurprisingly, in service to our world.

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

The astrologer Michael Lennox once said, in passing:
"The world is not happening to you, not even for you, or through you, but as you."

I found these perspectives thought-worthy and decided to think about them out loud.

It is interesting how each step along this process of going from the first, to the second, to the third and to the fourth perspective is automatically achieved by letting go of identification.  In the end, de-identifying with everything cannot be distinguished from being all.

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

Is it possible to keep our faith in spite of all the dark moments we experience?  What is faith?  What can we base it on an how can we use it to have a beautiful life?

We start off by listening to a part of the tango “Tormenta” (Storm, in English), arranged by Carlos di Sarli featuring Mario Pomar, as a poetic expression for the lack of faith in life.

"...Yo siento que mi fe se tambalea,
que la gente mala, vive
¡Dios! mejor que yo…"

In English:
"...I feel that my faith falters,
that bad people live,
God! better than me..."

We note that, as we spoke in the previous episode, the systems of our world are set up in a way that favours people who are not ethical actors.

However, we also note that we are actually not set up in that way.  We actually prefer love over what we call negative emotions.   In wishing to live in a way that enables these expansive emotions we actually use faith.

Such a way is similar to what we discussed in episode 47, where we do not focus on the details and the reductionistic step-by-step process in the beginning.  Instead we need to be able to open up to a wider field of possibilities, potentialities.

The basis of faith is uncertainty and our knowledge of how profoundly limited we are in our minds.

We mention Michael A. Singer and his book "The Surrender Experiment", as an example of a person who manages to let go of his attachments to the details and roles and is thus able to live a life filled with miracles.

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

Why is life so difficult?  Why do we have to struggle so much and yet often gain so little?  Why are millions starving?  Why is there so much lack and why is abundance so difficult to come by?

Even though most would agree that abundance and love are what we value, the systems around our material world are not set up that way.

Instead our systems are set up to value scarcity.  We protect it and manufacture it.  And we use fear to make sure that we can keep whatever scarce goods we can gain.

Is it possible to build a system that values abundance instead of scarcity?  What would that mean?

Then, that which we value would not be something that could bring me an advantage over someone else, instead we would value that which elevates us all the most. 

This requires a profound change in all of our interactions, including communication, and could lead to a system where we would live more aligned with who we feel we are and with what we feel we value (love, freedom, creativity, abundance).

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

Inspired by the movement called "Effective Altruism", I asked myself the question as I have seen it posed:  "How can I do the most good, given my limited resources?"

As I asked it, I wondered if the second part of the question, "...given my limited resources", was not tripping me up in finding the most natural answer. 

To show how the second part is problematic I start out by one of the suggestions from the Effective Altruism community members, which proposes that we end greed.   

Thus we explore the subject of greed, desire, power, time itself, instant gratification, addiction, sacrifice, and end up focusing on identity.

If we were to act from our infinite essence, as our essence, within the finite world, would the natural consequence not be that of automatically doing "the most good"?

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

"The Devil is in the Structure", and it is the structure, or the system, that provides a slanting floor and makes it easier for us to become, identify as, and live as agents for the system.

Systems ultimately lend us their eyes and we end up seeing the world through their perspective, losing other sight.  We talk about this in the context of the system of "Capitalism".

If this is so, what type of system or structure would we be interested in?  How would we like to see the world?

We mention that our current system is in the ending phase of self-termination.  To create one that may stand a chance to survive long-term and thrive, combining with our nature, we look to a system beyond separation, where all-win is the objective.

We briefly say state some of the core issues to be addressed. 

Thus the easier, and harder, path to becoming what you truly choose to become, based on your pure inspiration, is one where we start by living in a way that eventually creates a structure, or system, which allows us to envision the world as we truly wish to see it.

If you have any comments, questions, or suggestions for the podcast you can contact me on Instagram @BasiasThoughts.  And, of course, if you would like to see more content from me do sponsor me on https://www.patreon.com/basia because that will allow me to focus more on content creation.

PS.  In this episode I also mention Marshall Rosenberg's "Nonviolent Communication".  I you feel inspired, I just recently put up an 8 week course on Udemy based on it, so that we may find ways of connecting deeply and in satisfying ways with others, despite the polarisations in  our society. 
You can find it here:  https://www.udemy.com/course/draft/4612916/?referralCode=44241D03D9201AE4D365