Episode Title:
The Courage to Leave: Reclaiming Your Worth When Your Heart Still Hopes
Host:
Donella Kaindaneh
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Episode Overview:
In this deeply personal and transformative episode, Donella opens up about the courage it takes to leave a relationship when your heart is still holding onto hope. Speaking from her own experiences and years of coaching clients, Donella sheds light on the realities of emotional abuse, manipulation, and the invisible scars they leave behind. She guides listeners in recognising their true worth, separating fact from harmful narratives, and beginning the process of healing and reclamation.
Topics Covered:
• When Hope and Reality Collide:
Donella shares her own story of heartbreak, unveiling how even after a painful breakup, lingering hope and manipulation can keep us emotionally captive.
• Recognising Emotional Abuse:
Understand the subtle and devastating nature of emotional abuse, from trauma bonding and love bombing to gaslighting and bread crumbing.
• The Weight You Carry:
An honest look at how many end up running the entire relationship, financially, emotionally, physically, and mentally, while being told they’re “not enough.”
• Self-Worth vs. Self-Esteem:
Learn the crucial difference between these two pillars of identity, why self-worth is your foundation, and how to start rebuilding both.
• Actionable Exercises:
• Who’s Really Running This Relationship? A guided journal assessment across five key areas of life and partnership.
• The Evidence List: A practical exercise to separate harmful partner narratives from reality, helping you see your true contributions and value.
Key Takeaways:
• Emotional abuse often goes unrecognised because the wounds are invisible, but its effects are just as profound as physical harm.
• Hope can be used as a form of manipulation—that “good times” are strategic, not genuine acts of love.
• Recognising what you bring to your relationship (versus what you’ve been told) is your first step toward healing.
• Self-worth is intrinsic and unchanging—it’s your birthright, no matter your past or another’s opinion.
• You are not alone, not crazy, and it is possible to reclaim your peace and power.
Resources Mentioned:
• YouTube: “The Abuser’s Playbook” by HealthyGamerGG (Dr. K)—insightful video on manipulation [search YouTube for ‘Abuser’s Playbook Healthy Gamer GG’]
• Books on Self-Worth: Donella will include specific recommendations in the episode’s show notes.
• Coaching:
• Donella offers free discovery calls for women ready to invest in their transformation. Book at talktodonella.com for coaching starting in July.
A Note from Donella:
If today’s episode stirred something in you, know that you are not alone and help is available. If you’re leaving a relationship, please prioritise your safety above all else. Donella will share additional support resources at the end of next week’s episode.
This is Part 1 of a 2-Part Special!
Next week, we’ll dive into the fears that keep us stuck—fear of being alone, starting over, and handling judgment—and explore Donella’s most effective frameworks for lasting self-healing and empowerment.
If you found this episode valuable, please consider subscribing and sharing it with someone who may benefit from hearing this message.
Stay Brave. Choose Yourself. Find Your Peace.
Additional resources:
HealthyGamerGG – The Abuser’s Playbook
Dr Kristen Neff’s books and resources on Self-Compassion and her mindfulness practices. She has a lot of free resources you can use.
Her website is https://self-compassion.org/
Dr Ramani – all her books, her YouTube channel and her website –
https://doctor-ramani.com/
The National Domestic Abuse Helpline
The freephone, 24-hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline - 0808 2000 247
https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/
Some organisations have a free Employee Assistance program. It is a free and confidential service with qualified counsellors you can talk to in confidence. Use it if you have access.
