Becoming a Light

God stirred something in my heart in 2020 that I could not ignore. He called me to be a light, during such a dark time, but it felt like a calling too big for one person. In the beginning of 2021, God showed me how He planned to use me as a light. My husband and I obediently followed Him, but it was still scary at times.. Listen to this episode to hear how God is using us to be a light in our communities.

It seems like one of the most common things moms struggle with is energy. Often times, it can be lack of sleep that contributes to low energy, but that's not the only thing impacting energy.

You can't always sleep more hours, so impacting the quality of your sleep is necessary in order to increase your energy. Here are some ways to impact the quality of your sleep:

1. Stay hydrated - drink plenty of water.

2. Avoid certain foods - foods that are processed, high in sugar and fried can add to low energy, and poor sleep.

3. Avoid energy drinks and those high in sugar.

4. Do eat lean protein.

5. Do eat healthy carbs - oats, rice, quinoa, fruits and veggies

6. Avoid stress - if you feel overwhelmed, do what you can to eliminate that stress before bed, so it does not impact your sleep.

7. Exercise - if nothing else, walk at least 30 minutes a day.

Listen to today's episode to lean more.

I would venture a guess that no one is experiencing the life they thought they would in 2020, but today's topic isn't really about 2020. Today's topic is a bit more general.

The truth is, many women feel like something is missing if their life. They feel unfulfilled and they aren't exactly sure what is off.

Let's take a look at some reasons why you might not feel fulfilled.

You are not healthy. You probably assume I mean physically healthy - but I actually mean physically, mentally and spiritually.

Let's break each down:

Physical health: taking care of your body impacts your sleep, your opinion of yourself, your immune system, your medical bills, the medications you need to take, your weight, your energy and more.

Here are some things to consider:

1. How is your diet? Do you eat balanced meals? Are you eat mostly packaged or fresh food?
2. Do you drink at least half your body weight in ounces of water each day?
3. Do you exercise?
4. Do you like the person you see in the mirror?

Mental health: your mindset helps determine your focus and the choices you make each day. Changing your focus to something positive, will change how you live each day.

Here are some things to consider:

1. Make note of the things you say to yourself throughout the day. Do you think more negative or positive thoughts?
2. How do you wake up each day? Are your thoughts positive or negative when you wake up?
3. How do you sleep each night? Are you going to sleep thinking of negative things? Do you wake in the middle of the night with things on your mind?

Spiritual health: having a strong relationship with God is more important than anything else I will discuss today.

Here are some things to consider:

1. Do you pray each day? If so, how many times? Are you only going to God when you need something, or are you going to Him with everything?
2. Do you read devotionals, participate in studies or read faith-based books?
3. Do you have friends that share your beliefs that you can discuss your faith with?
4. Do you pray together as a family?
5. Are you involved in your Church?

Your career, relationship with your spouse and finances are other reasons why you might not feel fulfilled.

Career: most of us spend more hours at work, than we do at home with our families. Because of this, if our work does not fulfill us, that can filter into our home life.

Here are some things to consider:

1. Are you excited about the work you do?
2. Do you feel dread each night before you go to bed, because you know you have to return to work the next day?
3. Do you feel guilty about leaving your family to work? Do you feel like you are missing out on things at home?
4. Do you feel you are meant to do something else, but you are not sure what that is?

Your relationship with your spouse: between work and raising kids, it's not uncommon for this relationship to suffer.

Here are some things to consider:

1. Are you each putting in the effort to grow your relationship? Are you having date nights? Reading books together? Spending time alone to talk?
2. Are you balancing household tasks?
3. Are you properly discussing frustrations in your relationships or pushing them down and allowing them to fester? Are you allowing feelings of resentment to take over?
4. Are you discussing decisions that impact the family together? Are you controlling decisions?
5. When is the last time you were alone with your spouse and talked to them like you did when you were dating?

Finances: we live in a society where shiny objects get our attention quite often. We think we need things and it's created an healthy relationship with money.

Here are some things to consider:

1. Do you find yourself stressed about money each month?
2. Do you find yourself desiring things your neighbors or friends buy?
3. Do you have debt?
4. Do you and your spouse argue about money?
5. Do you know where all your money goes each month?

Listen to the full episode now, and to take a deeper dive into your life, and get a step-by-step plan on how to improve each of the areas above, check out my full self-paced program here: https://www.balancedlife.coach/your-balanced-life/

Every person’s definition of being success is different in some way or the other. While some may call success as having a faithful spouse or being a responsible parent, others equate it with fame, power and wealth.

So, before diving in, define success and what it means to you. You cannot be successful if you don’t know what it actually means to you. Set your goals clear and try to be as realistic as possible.

Plan ahead and plan big

Next in the journey towards success is to plan ahead of what you want to achieve in life and plan big for yourself. Never underestimate your worth or skills and plan accordingly.

Lean how to balance life

After careful and wise planning, balance your life like your professional, financial, personal things very logically and practically.

Find the purpose or goal of your life

Know the things that affect you, the things you simply love to do and the ones that provide you utter satisfaction. As you identify what you like, you can use it to find the main goal of your life. Knowing what you love will bring you motivation along the course of your journey towards attaining success.

Stay away from distractions

Distractions can be the spice or forbidden fruit in your life, as per the way you take it. So be clear and be focused on your goals. Distractions will surely be there but don’t make them affect you. When you see that your goals take a backseat because of such distractions, just banish them for once and for all.

Accept things as they come

You need to accept the fact that life can be really unfair. You can repent about it and just wish it to be different, or you can take the step forward to go out there and do something. Stop wasting your time and use situations for your own benefit. Just think that Newton could have complained about the apple falling on his head, but instead, he discovered the law of gravity.

Say goodbye to all your fears

Remove fear from your thinking and stay focused on positive things in life. And when you fail, just don’t be fearful, be positive and start again.

In fact, the road towards success will be complete with hard work, rejections, pain, disappointment and other things but as you reach the end, you will definitely feel victorious and happy. You will feel really proud about overcoming the obstacles and reaching out to your goals.

Also, you will be satisfied and happy when you start experiencing that success is coming your way. Always remember that success comes to those who try hard. Just follow this and enjoy a successful life ahead.

I don't know about you, but I find myself at times saying that once a certain event in life is over, I will do something. So, as an example, in the past, we weren't always committed to attending Church each Sunday. We preferred to have a day without setting an alarm and felt like it was a pain to get the kids ready to go.

Do I think you need to attend Church to be Christian? I do not. However, I do believe it strengthens your faith when you attend on a regular basis. I bring up this example to dive into a deeper topic.

I grew up in a Christian household and believed in Jesus, but I was not making my faith an important part in my life. I was too busy working and raising a family, or so I told myself. I would turn to God when I needed Him, but I certainly was not putting Him first in my life.

I was getting out of the relationship, exactly what I was putting in, which wasn't what I needed. I remember seeing a friend of mine post boldly about her love for Jesus and I thought she was extremely brave. I'm actually embarrassed to admit that I felt that way. Later, I reach out to her to let her know what her posts did for me.

I started to think about my relationship with God and realized that I was a bit disconnected. During this time, I also found myself wondering if God truly existed (the whole I can't see him, so how do I know??). A conversation with my husband one evening was a turning point for me in my faith. He gave me peace about my doubts and made it clear that everyone goes through these moments. It was also a turning point in our marriage.

That was the start of a journey that lasted several years. Some were tough, and I believe very much that the enemy was attacking me, and God was fighting for my soul. I'm grateful that God won.

I'm being extremely vulnerable, because I know what it's like to be lost and broken. If you are struggling with doubts, or maybe you don't even realize you have doubts, but you are just disconnected, I want you to know you are not alone. I want you to know to start the fight or keep pushing through your current fight. It can be hard, but nothing is better than finding the person God created you to be.

My heart has been heavy for those in the path of Laura. Earlier this week, I was anticipating Laura heading our way, and it took me back to previous storms we have gone through as a family, most recently being Harvey.

Of course, I was happy Harvey didn't come towards us, but I can't say that I am happy that it moved towards others. These storms can be terrifying. We have no control over what is going to happen. We can prepare to improve our survival and potential damage, but we cannot control the storm itself.

It actually makes me think of "storms" we experience in life. Those dark times that seem endless, terrifying and out of our control. The thing is, just as with physical storms, we do have control over some aspects of these moments as well.

Let's look at our current situation - many of us are faced with daily challenges right now. We can't properly plan for the future, we have to wear an uncomfortable mask everywhere we go and our children are dealing with an extremely different school situation this year.

No matter your stance on the current situation, we can all agree that none of this is ideal. None of this is the way we want to live our lives. Many are probably saying 'once this is all over then I will do XYZ'. Some are probably thinking this will never end. Some think it will end when a vaccine is out. Some are angry at the mention of a vaccine. Oh and then there is the upcoming election. That's a happy topic, right?

There are three things getting me through this storm.

Prayer. I have certainly had to increase my prayer time and maybe that's by design. We know that God will allow things to happen so that we lean on Him. My faith has grown through other storms and this storm is no different.

Friends and Family. Know who you can reach out to right now when you need a pick me up, or even a quick vent session. Also, be mindful that they might not share your thoughts or opinions. This has been challenging for me. People that normally align with my viewpoints don't right now, so I have had to learn to be respectful of our differing opinions.

Perspective. Some changes that have come out of this have been fine, or even welcome. However, many have felt like a gut punch. Most of the gut punch moments have come with changes that impact my kids. This has required some personal mindset work and prayer to help me shift my perspective.

Growing up, my brother always naturally did quite well in school, and I definitely did not. I can now look back and realize why I didn't do as well, but mostly it's because I told myself he was smart and I wasn't.

In fact, it took me meeting my husband to realize that wasn't the case. He saw something in me that I never saw in myself. His belief in me changed my mindset completely.

Is there something you have told yourself for years that is holding you back?

Have you told yourself you aren't organized, capable of being an entrepreneur or something like me...smart?

Are there things that you have missed out on in life because you told yourself this lie? I know I can definitely think of some things that I have avoided because of the lies I have told myself.

Have you told yourself you can't handle our current situation? Have you told yourself this school year is going to be too hard? That it's impossible to work, run a business, raise kids, homeschool? It is a lot, but is it impossible? Probably not.

What if you started to tell yourself you can do it. What if you look for solutions to make it happen?

What if you start reaching out to friends and neighbors so you can help each other? What if you start having conversations with your kids and spouse now about how to make this work?

Is there a job or business you have wanted to do but you tell yourself you are too shy to do that or not capable of the work?

What if you started to look for people like yourself who have done the same work successfully?

Do you think that would change your outlook?

Do you have a dream vacation in mind but think there is no way that would ever happen?

What if you did some side jobs to save the money, or started to put away a little each week to save for the trip? What if you gave up some items that weren't that important?

The lies we tell ourselves shape the choices we make each day. Wouldn't our lives be better if we started to look for solutions, and not problems?

We are at a time in life right now where it seems like we are surrounded by problems, what if we woke up each day excited about the solutions that existed? Do you think that would change your day and life? I think so.

If you don't, why don't you try and see if you can prove me wrong. :)

One thing is for sure this school year, we will need to work hard on managing the disappointments. As moms, we have pressure coming at us from all sides right now.

We try to shoulder it all for our families, but it's tough. How do we manage back to school this year and still make it kind of normal for our kids? How do we handle the added stress of building a career/business and handling our kids at home with virtual learning? How do we handle the conversations about what is going on right now with schools, sports and other activities?

It's a lot. It is. In this episode, I dive into those topics and more! Let's lean on each other through this challenging time.

As we go through different seasons of life, our relationship with God can change as well. Sometimes that change is for the better, and sometimes, without even realizing it at the time, we can spend less time with God. Listen to this brief episode to hear more about my own experience and how I have approached this in my life.

Also, we just started our Virtual Summit, and you can grab your free ticket through the end of this week. https://summit.balancedlife.coach