This week on The Labia Lounge I am bringing you a powerful, practical, and deeply empowering conversation with Rei Alphonso. This chat dives into the real-life complexities of community responses to harm and conflict – from intimate partner violence and casual misogyny to microaggressions on the street or at the family dinner table, and beyond.

Rei brings over 20 years of experience across community education, mental health, gender-based violence, activism, and more. Together, we unpack why our current systems can feel so disempowering—and how reclaiming community power, agency, and mutual support can transform the way we respond to harm.

Tune in for:

• Practical tools and perspectives for becoming an active, empowered bystander (instead of a passive observer).
• Honest discussions on the emotional, social, and structural barriers that hold us back from stepping in.
• The importance of collective, non-carceral, and compassionate responses—whether it’s confronting dodgy jokes at a family dinner, supporting a friend, or handling big community reckonings.
• Scenario-based tips on what to do when facing everything from public conflict to sexual assault allegations within your circles.
• Why deconditioning our cultural “default scripts” and building resilient, feedback-friendly relationships can help create safer, more connected communities.

If you’ve ever wondered what it really means to “be the change” when tough stuff happens, this episode is for you. Whether you’re looking to better support your friends, family, or wider community—or just want to explore what real, collective care can look like—you’ll leave this chat with so much food for thought.

Follow Rei's work here: Lovingjusticeprojects.com

Plus you can expect all the usual antics and hilarious, vulnerable n' relatable personal stories and signature segments that you've come to know and love here in The Labia Lounge!

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