Belly Button Musings

In this episode, Harinder explores the paradox of resistance, how our efforts to keep ourselves ‘safe’ and comfortable often drain our energy and block the flow of life's possibilities. Using powerful metaphors like a boulder in a river and the game kerplunk, Harinder illustrates how focusing entirely on what we don't want can inadvertently stop everything else from flowing in. She invites listeners to rethink surrender not as giving up, but as an act of acceptance that opens the door to infinite potential and new outcomes we might never have imagined.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

When we put all our focus on preventing a specific outcome or circumstance, we drain our mental and physical energy, leaving little room for anything else to enter our lives.

While resistance is designed to keep us safe and maintain the status quo, it can also trap us in a cycle of limited possibilities, preventing growth and new experiences.

By fixating on what we ‘don't’ want (e.g., avoiding a certain type of person or outcome), we unintentionally block the flow of positive alternatives that could surprise and delight us.

Surrender isn't about defeat; it's about accepting the possibility of an unwanted outcome to release the fear and control that binds us, allowing life to flow freely again.

Instead of using imagination to terrify ourselves with ‘what ifs’, we can use it to visualise acceptance and openness, redirecting our energy toward outcomes we truly love.

BEST MOMENTS

"Resistance for me, simply put, is not allowing something to exist. We're just not ready to allow that in."

"If I put all of my energy and my focus on what I don't want, it stops everything. It stops the flow."

"We might be successful in stopping the possibility of that happening, but because it takes so much energy from us, it potentially also prevents other energy from flowing as well."

"Surrender is allowing for the possibility of something to happen that is potentially not what I want, but I'm being in the allowance of that."

"Just leaning into the universe having our backs, letting go of the reins and allowing it to be."

In this episode Harinder and Alicia explore the intriguing concept of 'stirring the pot'. They delve into how external influences and interactions with others can stir up our emotions, beliefs, and memories, often leading to unnecessary angst. Through personal anecdotes and relatable examples, they discuss the importance of recognising our own power in shaping how we feel about ourselves, rather than allowing others to dictate our emotions.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

The concept of "stirring the pot" symbolises how external influences and interactions with others can disrupt our internal state, bringing unresolved emotions and beliefs to the surface.

It's essential to recognize that we often give away our power to others by allowing their opinions and actions to dictate how we feel about ourselves. Taking control of our self-perception is crucial for emotional well-being.

Understanding our emotional wounds and how they affect our reactions is vital. Being aware of these wounds helps us navigate interactions without being overly influenced by others' perceptions.

Taking a moment to pause before reacting can provide clarity and perspective. This pause allows us to assess our feelings and responses, leading to more thoughtful and constructive interactions.

Life is a mix of chaos and stillness. Acknowledging that both movement and calm coexist can help us navigate emotional turbulence, allowing us to breathe through challenges and maintain a sense of balance.

BEST MOMENTS

"Stirring the pot creates a disruption. Whatever had settled - mostly memories, beliefs, thoughts, feelings - suddenly gets into motion."

"We place so much power behind what people think, how someone else feels, that's their own choice."

"If we can just focus on our own selves, it makes things a lot simpler, and you know you're just accountable for yourself."

"Stirring the pot isn't necessarily a bad thing, it's an opportunity for us to double-check that something I've always believed is still valid."

"We are too quick often to jump to our autopilot. That one-second pause can provide us with all the panoramic perspective we require."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/harinderkv

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/harinder-virdee-73a54630

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

In today's episode, Harinder reflects on the emotional journey of creation, and takes a look at the process of bringing ideas to life. She shares her personal experiences of doubt, vulnerability, and the joy of creation, likening the act of creating to giving birth. Harinder emphasises the importance of appreciating the intimate connection we have with our creations before they are exposed to the world and its judgments. She encourages listeners to cherish their creative journeys and to recognise that their relationship with their work is deeply personal, independent of external validation.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Creating something new involves a complex emotional journey, including feelings of doubt, frustration, and joy. It's important to acknowledge the range of emotions experienced during the creative process.

While creations can be seen as separate from the creator, there is a deep personal connection to the work. This bond is akin to a mother-child relationship, where the creator has invested love and energy into bringing the creation to life.

Before seeking external feedback, it's beneficial to take a moment to appreciate and savour the creation. This internal reflection helps reinforce the personal significance of the work, independent of others' opinions.

The importance of recognizing that external opinions do not define the value of a creation. The relationship with one's work is deeply personal and should not be overshadowed by the judgments of others.

Creators hold the authority over their work, and remembering this can help alleviate the pressure of seeking validation. The love and intention behind the creation are what truly matter, regardless of external feedback.

BEST MOMENTS

"What kind of meaning do we attach to our creations? Many books will talk about the fact that our creation is separate from us. I think I would probably agree with that."

"Whenever we do that, it may be subject to opinions, projections, people having thoughts about it that are different to yours."

"The reason I would create anything, if it's from a pure place, would be for its own sake, for no reason, just because I felt like it."

"It feels very much like a mother giving birth to a child. All that love and energy poured into the embryo that grows into a child."

"Our connection to what we create is deeply personal and has nothing to do with what people think about it or put on it."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/harinderkv

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/harinder-virdee-73a54630

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

In this episode, Harinder and Alicia consider the transformative question, "What would I love for myself now?" They explore the importance of self-reflection and the power of choosing joy in everyday life, especially during challenging times. Alicia shares her personal journey of seeking clarity and the impact of allowing oneself to pause and consider personal desires, while Harinder emphasises the significance of small, joyful moments.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

The importance of asking oneself, "What would I love for myself now?" can help pivot from negative emotions and lead to greater clarity about personal desires and needs.

Acknowledging and being kind to oneself is crucial. Simple acts like taking a nap or enjoying a cup of tea can significantly improve emotional well-being and foster a sense of joy.

Life is a continuous journey where clarity and purpose can evolve over time. It's essential to take small steps without the pressure of having everything figured out.

Reflecting on what others might think can reveal how much power we give away to external opinions. Recognising this can help reclaim personal agency and focus on what truly matters to oneself.

We always have the choice to pivot towards joy and fulfilment, regardless of circumstances. Embracing this choice allows for a more conscious and intentional approach to life, leading to a more joyful existence.

BEST MOMENTS

"One of the things I've been practicing has been exactly this question, what would I love for myself now? To gently move me out of my current emotional state into something that is of my choosing."

"When you actually pose it as, wow, what would I love for myself now, it totally changed the question. We don't pause long enough to ask what is it we would like ourselves."

"Sometimes it's just that first step that will allow other things to happen. We don't have to have everything figured out."

"This is about those projects that are heartfelt, that you really want to do from a space of, this is true for me to participate in."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/harinderkv

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/harinder-virdee-73a54630

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

Today, Harinder and Alicia take a look at the significance of having fun in our lives. They explore how incorporating moments of joy can lighten our emotional load, enhance productivity, and foster a healthier work-life balance. Both Harinder and Alicia share personal stories about their struggles with prioritising fun amidst daily responsibilities, highlighting the cultural pressures that often lead us to neglect our own enjoyment.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Engaging in fun activities can significantly lighten our emotional and mental load, allowing for a fresh perspective and renewed energy in both personal and professional settings.

Many people struggle to give themselves permission to take breaks for fun, often prioritising productivity over personal enjoyment. Recognising the need for fun is essential for maintaining balance and well-being.

Our emotional state and how we approach life can influence those around us, especially children. Modelling a joyful and fun-loving attitude can teach others the value of enjoying life.

Fun serves as a tool for emotional regulation, helping to manage stress and create space for creativity and new ideas. It’s about shifting focus from productivity to experiencing joy.

Keeping a record of fun memories or experiences can serve as a personal resource to draw upon during challenging times, helping to foster a positive mindset and encourage a more joyful outlook on life.

BEST MOMENTS

"Having fun, I feel, just relaxes all of that. It allows my guard to come down somewhat, and it allows me to open up."

"We live in a culture right now where productivity is so important. You have to make sure you do something at the end of the day."

"What if we were anchored in having fun? That was the place from where we were coming from, bringing enthusiasm and genuine excitement into what we're doing."

"Kids learn through what they see and what they experience. If you can teach people that you make time for yourself for fun, they'll see it too."

"It's about emotional regulation. It's healthy. It's generative in that it will allow a level of openness that may not have previously existed before the fun."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/harinderkv

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/harinder-virdee-73a54630

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

In this episode, Harinder explores the profound symbolism of a water droplet, reflecting on its infinite journey and the wisdom it embodies. Through vivid imagery, Harinder invites listeners to appreciate the beauty and complexity of water, emphasizing how it mirrors life's possibilities and connections. 

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Reflections and Perspectives: A water droplet serves as a metaphor for the reflections of light and darkness in life, highlighting that things are not always as they appear and that there are multiple perspectives to consider.

Time and Awareness: The experience of observing a water droplet can alter one's perception of time, creating a sense of "gloopy" time where infinite insights and awareness can emerge in a brief moment.

Connection and Community: The journey of a water droplet symbolizes the interconnectedness of life, emphasizing the importance of belonging and the impact of individual experiences on the greater whole.

Transformation and Continuity: Water's ability to change forms—liquid, gas, solid—illustrates the idea of transformation and continuity in life, suggesting that endings are merely transitions to new states of being.

Intuition and Intent: Engaging with water can enhance intuition and connection, as it is suggested that setting intentions can influence the structure of water, highlighting its potential as a medium for personal insight and growth.

BEST MOMENTS

"When looking at a water droplet, time feels different. The word I use is gloopy."

"A whole lifetime can be lived in one droplet. As it moves through the air, it changes constantly."

"Water is life, and so much more. Life-giving, we need it, but also how powerful it is."

"It may be absorbed into the atmosphere, absorbed into the universe; it's still there just in a different shape."

"If we can be anything today, let's try and emulate what it would be like to be a water drop."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/harinderkv

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/harinder-virdee-73a54630

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

In today's episode, Harinder welcomes her friend, Alicia Karabinos, to discuss the dynamic and often challenging balance between being and doing in modern life. The conversation explores the societal pressure to remain busy and productive, what the host calls "doing for productivity's sake" versus the profound power of stillness, presence, and simply being.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

The Difference Between Being and Doing: Unconscious doing is often linked to "clock time" and is driven by the mind, creating a sense of being busy but not necessarily moving forward. 

The Danger of Mindless Doing: Doing for the sake of productivity without an internal connection or purpose is referred to as "busy work". It can be a comfortable, unconscious distraction that ultimately leads to exhaustion, as the host experienced with burnout.

Thinking is a Form of Doing: Overthinking and allowing the mind to jump between the past and the future is essentially a non-productive, mind-driven form of doing. Consciously choosing not to think can be a more liberating place to move from.

The Creative Cycle of Being and Doing: True, productive creation comes from a cycle where inspiration is first received in the state of being (being still), then acted upon through mindful doing, followed by returning to being to assess, adjust, and continue the process.

Empowerment Through Holding Space: When supporting others, choosing to be by actively listening and "holding space" without judgment is more powerful than immediately stepping in to do. This allows the other person to connect to their own internal resources, accountability, and power for inspiration.

BEST MOMENTS

"A lot of books have been written, a lot of material is out there on the power of just being and what happens when we just be."

"You know, it's like it's like being on a treadmill. You're moving, you know, you're doing something, but you're not going anywhere."

"Are we just being productive for productivity's sake rather than maybe take a moment just to see how useful being productive actually is?"

"That going backwards and forwards in your mind is very much a it's a mind it's a process. Whereas being, would it be fair to say that's more heart-led?"

"Doing something without being, it's busy work, right? And then being and doing something, that becomes that's that's doing with purpose."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/harinderkv

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/harinder-virdee-73a54630

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

In this episode, Harinder explores the concept of 'giving from empty', reflecting on the motivations behind helping others when we ourselves are depleted. Drawing from personal experiences, Harinder discusses the challenges of being a people pleaser and the tendency to prioritise others' needs over our own. She emphasises the importance of self-care and the need to recognize our own emotional, spiritual, and physical capacities before extending help.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Helping others can stem from a desire to please or an inability to say no, often leading to neglecting one's own needs. It's important to assess whether the motivation to help is genuine or driven by personal emptiness.

When assistance is given without empowering the other person, it can create a cycle of dependency. This not only disempowers the individual seeking help but can also lead to feelings of burden for the helper.

Prioritising personal needs is crucial. Before offering help, it's essential to check if you have the emotional, mental, and physical capacity to assist others. Learning to say no is a vital part of self-care.

Instead of solving others' problems, providing a listening ear can empower them to find their own solutions. Encouraging self-reliance fosters personal growth for both parties.

Genuine support comes from a place of abundance rather than emptiness. By taking care of oneself first, individuals can become more resourceful and effective in helping others without compromising their own well-being.

BEST MOMENTS

"I had an inability to say no. It was about the other person more so than about myself."

"By helping out somebody else, even though we might be running on empty, we may already have negative feelings."

"If we begin by setting an intention that we're going to empower them, we're not going to do something for them."

"What remains in us is this hole, is an unfulfilled need and the only person who can actually understand what that is and help us to fill it is ourselves."

"It is better in the longer term to help someone to help themselves."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/harinderkv

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/harinder-virdee-73a54630

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

In today's episode, Harinder sits down with her friend Alicia as they discuss the complex and often challenging experience of 'navigating the unknown' in life. Harinder begins by sharing her personal journey, describing it as a 'rollercoaster' and a process of 'stripping bare of identities and labels' as she grapples with uncertainty. The conversation explores the struggle between looking to the past for a template or fearing the future, and the power of embracing the present moment.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Navigating the unknown often involves letting go of old identities and labels ('stripping myself bare of identities and labels') that no longer serve you, a process that can feel like being 'washed clean' but ultimately leads you back to your true core.

The present moment is the only true anchor you have when facing the unknown, as dwelling on the past (for a template) or the future (with anxiety) prevents you from seeing new possibilities.

Reframe the unknown from a terrifying, dark experience to a 'pool of possibilities', which encourages curiosity, play, and a willingness to explore different sides of yourself.

Difficult or unsettling moments are not a waste of time or a sign of failure, but rather 'stepping stones' that lead you to new opportunities and a greater appreciation for your life and what you are truly capable of.

A crucial part of navigating life's uncertainties is practicing self-love, self-acceptance, and forgiveness, allowing your "whole self" to be present, flaws and all, without holding back.

BEST MOMENTS

"I find I always use the term navigating the unknown, which says so much because I'm still trying to find my way through it."

"The idea of sitting in the space where we are deeply unsettled it is a core part of me being able to navigate the unknown."

"I think the process has been a series of stepping stones to get to where I am now."

"It is an invitation for all of us, all of our self, to play in that, to play in the unknown, so we have a full relationship with the unknown."

"That is part of our beauty. That we all have our different colours of our personality."

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

In today's episode, Harinder holds her very first interview with fellow podcast host and friend, Alicia Karabinos. They focus on the concept of 'appreciation' and explore the differences between appreciation and gratitude. They also highlight the importance of slowing down to notice the beauty around us, drawing on personal anecdotes and philosophical insights, including the ancient Greek concepts of Kronos and Kairos time.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Appreciation is about being present and noticing the richness of life in the moment, while gratitude is reflective, often focused on past experiences. Appreciation serves as a grounding process that can enhance our overall well-being.

In a fast-paced world, taking the time to appreciate our surroundings and experiences can lead to a deeper connection with life. This practice can lower stress and improve mental and physical health.

Recognising and acknowledging our current challenges can serve as a precursor to appreciation. This awareness can help us find value even in difficult situations, fostering resilience.

When one person embodies appreciation, it can positively influence those around them. This shared energy can create a collective atmosphere of positivity and connection.

Simple practices, such as taking a moment to breathe and notice our surroundings, can cultivate appreciation in daily life. Engaging fully in experiences, like savouring food or drink, can enhance our ability to appreciate the present moment.

BEST MOMENTS

"Appreciation is essentially about making our lives richer in all ways, both good and bad. It can protect us against regrets."

"Living in appreciation is a lot easier when things are going well, but they are harder to experience when we are going through challenges in life."

"Acknowledging where you're at in a challenge is almost like hitting a pause button, and that's where the beginning of awareness comes in."

"Appreciation becomes even more important as we get older, especially with everything that's happening in the world."

"When we appreciate, it feels like we're bringing all parts of ourselves back together and we're whole again in that second."

VALUABLE RESOURCES

https://www.howtolandyouridealjob.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/harinderkv

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/harinder-virdee-73a54630

HOST BIO

I am Harinder. Having worked closely with people from all over the world professionally in a corporate setting and since, carving out my own path in the past few years. I am an illustrator, artist and designer. I use intuitive creativity and my leadership skills for transformational coaching. I also create tools for personal and team development. Not new to podcasting, I have previously co-created a mini podcast series called How to Land Your Ideal Job.

With this podcast series, I wanted to share my life learnings particularly during the fallow period of life when my life’s direction has not been clear and I’ve had to dig deep below the various identities I had collected and assumed to reconnect with who I really am. Digging through the proverbial lead to share golden nuggets of insight. I hope to take people on mellow belly button contemplations that lead to questions for self inquiry and open up new imagined possibilities to new realities.

This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/