Betrayal is a different type of trauma for two reasons:  1.  It feels intentional, it is rejection which is different than if you lose someone you love.  2.  There are a collection of symptoms (physical and mental) and time does not heal them.   Today Dr Debi Silber the founder of the PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute a holistic psychologist and author shares her insight into betrayal.  And there is a lot.  During her recent PHD study she learned the 5 stages of betrayal.

1. Set up stage where you ignore your feelings.

2. Shock and trauma-your world view is shattered.  

3. Survival instincts emerge.  This is the place where most people get stuck.  In this stage people do not trust anyone,  or they think maybe they deserved it. This stage can last for years and often people can call more distrustful relationships into their lives.  

4. Finding and adjusting to a new normal.  If friends and loved ones don't rise they don't come with you.

5. This is where the healing is with a re-birth, self love, mind healing and a new world view. 

The questions you can ask yourself if you are feeling stuck in number 3 are: am I numbing or avoiding feelings if so how?  What am I pretending to see, what will my life look like in 5 years if I do nothing? What can life look like if I change?

If you have been betrayed you need to rebuild self trust in your truth.  If you chose to trust the betrayer again It is up to the betrayer to build that trust brick by brick.

Dr. Debi Silber is the founder of the PBT (Post Betrayal Transformation) Institute and is a holistic psychologist, a health, mindset and personal development expert, the author of Trust Again, and is a 2-time #1 International bestselling author of: The Unshakable Woman AND From Hardened to Healed: The Effortless Path to Release Resistance, Get Unstuck and Create a Life You Love. Her podcast: From Betrayal to Breakthrough is also globally ranked within the top 1.5% of podcasts. Her recent PhD study on how we experience betrayal made 3 groundbreaking discoveries that changes how long it takes to heal. In addition to being on FOX, CBS, The Dr. Oz Show, TEDx (twice) and more, she’s an award-winning speaker and coach dedicated to helping people move past their betrayals as well as any other blocks preventing them from the health, work, relationships, confidence, and happiness they want most.

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After 18 years of Elder Law and Family Law, Lesa Koski brings extensive experience to the complex area of Mediation.  Koski Law & Mediation offers:

1. A simple streamlined approach to Divorce with a peaceful outcome.

2. Attorney turned Mediator with a modest flat fee and unlimited communication.

3. At your side from start to finish and beyond.

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