Divorce stress, anxiety relief, nervous system regulation—this episode shares practical tools to calm anxiety fast during divorce for women over 40. If divorce stress has you spinning out, this conversation will help you regulate your nervous system, calm anxiety fast, and find clarity in the moment. Host Lesa Koski welcomes DNA nutritionist and mindfulness teacher Elaine “Lane” Kennedy to talk nervous system regulation, stress management, and how lifestyle habits influence gene expression. You’ll learn what to do when self-coaching feels impossible, why movement can help more than journaling in traumatic moments, and how support and community help you navigate divorce stress with more calm and confidence. If you’re a woman over 40 navigating divorce, anxiety, and overwhelm, this episode offers real tools and hope—because midlife isn’t a crisis, it’s your comeback.

(Note: Adjust to match your final edit timecodes.)

1. (00:00) Welcome + why this episode matters for divorce stress and anxiety
2. (02:10) Meet Elaine “Lane” Kennedy: DNA nutritionist + mindfulness teacher
3. (06:00) The “white truck” moment: how stress shows up before we notice
4. (11:20) Why “pause” is the first step in nervous system regulation
5. (16:10) When “feeling your feelings” is too much: what to do instead
6. (19:45) Move your body to calm anxiety fast: shaking, walking, getting outside
7. (24:30) Why trauma shouldn’t be handled alone: community and co-regulation
8. (30:10) Protecting your peace when a partner is dysregulated
9. (36:40) DNA testing + gene expression: why one-size-fits-all wellness advice fails
10. (44:20) Alcohol, anxiety, and stress: why it often makes things worse
11. (49:10) The missing piece: fun, joy, and nervous system healing in midlife
12. (55:30) Closing encouragement + how to connect with Lane

1. Pause first: nervous system regulation creates clarity when divorce stress is high.
2. Move before you process: in traumatic moments, movement can calm anxiety faster than journaling.
3. Co-regulation matters: hard seasons feel lighter when you’re supported by safe people.
4. Protect your peace: you are not responsible for regulating your partner’s emotions.
5. Personalized wellness wins: DNA-informed lifestyle changes can support long-term health and resilience.

Elaine “Lane” Kennedy is a California-based DNA nutritionist and mindfulness teacher who helps people reduce stress, regulate the nervous system, and support health through personalized lifestyle strategies. With a background in mindfulness practices and DNA-based wellness education, Lane teaches practical tools to build capacity, calm anxiety, and create sustainable habits that support whole-body resilience.

Website and Social Media links:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/lanekennedy

https://www.facebook.com/lanekennedycoach

https://www.instagram.com/lane_kennedy_

https://www.youtube.com/lanekennedy-levy

divorce stress, calm anxiety fast, nervous system regulation, divorce recovery, women over 40 divorce, stress management tools, mindfulness for anxiety, co-regulation, emotional resilience, divorce mindset, DNA nutritionist, gene expression lifestyle, midlife reinvention, divorce podcast, Doing Divorce Different, Lesa Koski, anxiety relief techniques, trauma support, yoga nidra, wellness misinformation

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Marrie Simpson’s Metabolic Reset

jjflizanes.com/lesa

Divorce mediation can save you time, money, and emotional stress. Learn how divorce mediation works, why mediation matters, and how to divorce with dignity and peace.

If you’re facing divorce, this episode walks you through exactly why divorce mediation may be the smartest first step you take. As an attorney, mediator, and life coach, Lesa shares how divorce mediation helps couples avoid court battles, reduce legal costs, and protect their kids while keeping their dignity intact.

You’ll learn the 3 powerful reasons divorce mediation works better than litigation — plus the 3 big decisions you should make before filing paperwork so you feel prepared instead of overwhelmed.

This is real, compassionate guidance for women and families who want to do divorce differently — calmer, smarter, and with less damage.

Because midlife isn’t your crisis… it’s your comeback.

(00:00) Welcome + why divorce feels so heavy

(02:10) Why Lesa returned to mediation after stepping away

(04:05) What a divorce mediator actually does (and how it’s different from attorneys)

(06:30) Reason #1: Mediation saves time

(08:12) Reason #2: Mediation saves money

(09:45) Reason #3: Mediation protects your peace and dignity

(12:20) The 3 decisions to make before starting divorce

(13:00) Dividing assets: homes, 401(k)s, pensions explained

(18:40) Maintenance/spousal support basics

(22:15) Child support + parenting plans

(25:30) Why mediation is critical for co-parenting

(28:10) Parenting plan course + free masterclass

(30:00) Encouragement for high-conflict or difficult co-parenting situations

(32:20) Final thoughts: doing divorce with dignity + where to get help

• Divorce mediation helps you avoid costly court battles

• You can save thousands of dollars by reaching agreements together

• Calm communication leads to better long-term co-parenting

• Decide finances, income/maintenance, and parenting plans early

• Divorce doesn’t have to be a war — it can be handled with dignity

Lesa Koski is an attorney, divorce mediator, life coach, and host of Doing Divorce Different. With decades of legal and mediation experience, she helps women and families navigate divorce with clarity, confidence, and compassion. Her mission is simple: help people protect their peace, their finances, and their kids while creating a healthier next chapter.

🌿 Work with Lesa (mediation + coaching): https://lesakoski.com

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divorce mediation, divorce help, divorce process, divorce support for women, co parenting tips, mediation vs divorce lawyer, peaceful divorce, divorce coaching, family mediation, child custody help, midlife transitions, women over 40 divorce, divorce advice, divorce podcast, how to divorce peacefully

Core wounds healing + nervous system rewiring for women over 40. In this episode, JJ Flizanes joins Lesa Koski to unpack core wounds healing, the “core wound map,” and how your subconscious beliefs shape people-pleasing, abandonment fears, and everyday triggers. You’ll learn why core wounds healing isn’t just awareness—it’s rewiring, stretching past comfort zones, and building new neural pathways. JJ shares how core wounds healing can change your patterns in real time, and why choosing yourself is the pathway out of abandonment loops. Plus, a powerful look at 2026’s “Year of the Fire Horse” energy—movement, action, and expansion after a season of shedding.

If you’re navigating midlife change, divorce recovery, emotional healing, or you’re ready to stop spiraling and start choosing you, this conversation will meet you right where you are.

(These are listener-friendly timestamps—adjust to match your final audio.)

(00:00) Welcome + why JJ is a “big deal” and where to find her work

(02:10) Lesa’s healing journey + why the Core Wounds course mattered

(05:10) JJ explains core wounds as subconscious beliefs (and why therapy can stall)

(10:40) The “core wound map” + why people process differently (moon signs + patterns)

(16:30) Why awareness isn’t always enough: rewiring requires stretching

(20:30) The “video that made her cry” example + how the brain flags “unsafe”

(24:40) Neuroplasticity story: cats in an RV + how the brain learns “I didn’t die”

(28:40) Lesa gets real: people-pleasing, overexplaining, and tiny daily triggers

(33:10) Abandonment wound: the belief underneath it + “How do you abandon yourself?”

(38:15) “Choose you” homework: one daily small step + one bigger weekly stretch

(42:30) Healing in relationship vs healing alone + the power of mirroring

(47:10) Tribe + community: why group energy accelerates growth

(50:25) 2025 shedding → 2026 Year of the Fire Horse begins Feb 17, 2026

(55:10) How to work with JJ + her application link + closing

1. Core wounds are subconscious beliefs that shape how you see yourself and relationships—often without you realizing it.
2. Awareness is step one, but rewiring requires action that stretches your comfort zone and builds new neural pathways.
3. People-pleasing and overexplaining can be signs of an abandonment pattern—your nervous system trying to stay “safe.”
4. Healing isn’t just emotional; it’s nervous-system and behavior change, practiced moment-to-moment and proactively.
5. Community matters: being in a tribe of people on a similar growth path keeps your “coal” warm and your progress moving.

JJ Flizanes is a personal development coach, podcast host, and creator of emotional healing programs focused on identifying and rewiring subconscious patterns. She developed the Core Wound Map, expanding on the core wound exercise from Imago therapy, and continues to teach tools for emotional resilience, nervous system awareness, and practical rewiring strategies.

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jjflizanes.com/lesa

core wounds healing, core wound map, emotional healing, nervous system regulation, neuroplasticity, abandonment wound, people pleasing, overexplaining, subconscious beliefs, Imago therapy, relationship patterns, trauma healing tools, mindset coaching, midlife healing, women over 40, self worth, choosing yourself, boundaries, emotional resilience, JJ Flizanes, Doing Life Different, Lesa Koski, year of the fire horse 2026

Healing from trauma, childhood grief, miscarriage, and generational pain starts with one step: choosing yourself. In this powerful episode of Doing Life Different, Lesa Koski talks with life coach Vivian Moyo about healing trauma, the impact of losing a parent young, how silence in families creates emotional wounds, and how choosing yourself becomes an act of self-love. Vivian shares her story of childhood loss, two devastating miscarriages, and the moment she began her healing journey. If you’re navigating midlife trauma, divorce recovery, grief, anxiety, or a major life change, this conversation will help you feel seen, supported, and hopeful.

In this episode, we talk about trauma healing, generational trauma, grief recovery, and how to choose yourself when life feels heavy. Vivian’s message is a reminder that healing is possible—and midlife is not your crisis, it’s your comeback.

🎧 Listen now and share this with a woman who needs encouragement today.

In this episode, we talk about trauma healing, generational trauma, grief recovery, and how to choose yourself when life feels heavy. Vivian’s message is a reminder that healing is possible—and midlife is not your crisis, it’s your comeback.

🎧 Listen now and share this with a woman who needs encouragement today.

(00:00) Welcome + technical difficulties + introducing life coach Vivian Moyo

(02:10) Vivian’s background: born in Zimbabwe, now living in London

(04:20) Losing her mother at age three and having no memory of her

(07:10) The trauma of family silence and not knowing how her mother died

(10:35) Why children need truth, support, and emotional safety

(13:50) Generational trauma and how pain gets passed down

(16:30) Moving to the UK at 11 and feeling different within the family

(20:05) Miscarriage and heartbreak: losing her first pregnancy at five months

(22:45) Losing a second pregnancy at five months and reaching a breaking point

(25:30) Suicidal thoughts and the “still voice” that changed everything

(28:10) Vivian’s calling: helping young girls build confidence and self-worth

(31:10) Supporting women through domestic abuse and trauma recovery

(33:45) Vivian’s upcoming book: The Invisible Girl (launching in June)

(36:10) One powerful tip for self-love: “Choose yourself”

(38:05) Final encouragement + how to connect with Vivian

1. Trauma can start early, and silence often deepens the wound
2. Generational trauma is real, but healing can break the cycle
3. Grief and miscarriage loss can create deep emotional pain, but recovery is possible
4. Healing often begins when we choose support, truth, and self-compassion
5. “Choosing yourself” is one of the strongest acts of self-love and boundary-setting

Vivian Moyo is a London-based life coach, speaker, and founder of women-focused healing initiatives supporting survivors of trauma and domestic abuse. Born in Zimbabwe, Vivian has transformed her personal journey of loss and resilience into a mission to help women heal, build confidence, and reclaim their lives. She is the author of the upcoming book The Invisible Girl, launching in June.

Vivian:

Youtube Channel : https://www.youtube.com/@MoyoWellnessTherapy

TikTok : www.tiktok.com/@moyowellnesstherapypods

Instagram : @moyowellnesstherapy

Website : https://moyowellnesstherapy.com/

E: [email protected]

DIY Parenting Plan Course

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Sign up for my newsletter https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj

Marrie Simpson’s Metabolic Reset

jjflizanes.com/lesa

trauma healing, childhood trauma, generational trauma, miscarriage healing, grief recovery, healing after loss, women’s healing, midlife healing, choosing yourself, self love for women, emotional healing, boundary setting, domestic abuse recovery, life coach for women, healing journey, divorce recovery, midlife comeback, Doing Life Different podcast, Lesa Koski, Vivian Moyo, anxiety healing, faith and healing, healing in midlife

1. Book a coaching session with Lesa:
2. Find More From Lesa Here!
3. Sign up for my newsletter https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
4. Marrie Simpson’s Metabolic Reset
5. jjflizanes.com/lesa
6. Sign up for my newsletter! https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
7. Ebook https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0G4B2ZY1W?ref=yb_qv_ov_kndl_dp_rw
8. Divorce Clarity 40+ Community

How to Process Unwanted Feelings After 40 | The S.O.U.L. Method for Emotional Clarity

Unwanted feelings after 40 can feel overwhelming—especially during divorce or emotional seasons. In this episode, Lesa shares her S.O.U.L. Method to calm emotions, regulate your nervous system, and move forward with clarity. Learn how to process unwanted feelings, set boundaries, and choose aligned action with faith-based support. This episode is for women navigating divorce, emotional overwhelm, and midlife transitions who want clarity instead of chaos.

(00:00) Why unwanted feelings surface during the holidays

(05:12) Introducing the S.O.U.L. Method

(10:08) Stillness and surrendering emotions to God

(18:30) Identifying beliefs behind your feelings

(26:15) Using empathy and strengths on yourself

(34:40) Aligned action and setting guilt-free boundaries

(41:50) Divorce Clarity 40+ community invitation

1. Unwanted feelings are signals, not failures
2. Stillness helps regulate emotional overwhelm
3. Questioning beliefs reduces suffering
4. Boundaries are an act of self-respect
5. Small aligned actions build self-trust

Lesa Koski is a former family law attorney turned mediator, divorce coach, and mindset coach. She helps women over 40 navigate divorce, emotional overwhelm, and midlife transitions with clarity, faith, and grounded decision-making.

1. Book a coaching session with Lesa:
2. Find More From Lesa Here!
3. Sign up for my newsletter https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
4. Marrie Simpson’s Metabolic Reset
5. jjflizanes.com/lesa
6. Sign up for my newsletter! https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
7. Ebook https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0G4B2ZY1W?ref=yb_qv_ov_kndl_dp_rw
8. Divorce Clarity 40+ Community

divorce clarity, unwanted feelings, emotional regulation, women over 40, divorce mindset, faith and healing, boundaries after divorce, midlife emotional health, soul method, divorce support for women

Forgiveness After 40: How Letting Go Heals Your Heart, Body & Faith

Forgiveness after 40 can unlock emotional healing, peace, and renewed faith. In this heartfelt holiday episode, Lesa Koski shares how forgiveness changed her life and helped her release anger, anxiety, and judgment. Through personal stories, faith-based reflection, and practical steps, this episode explores forgiveness as a path to healing—not for others, but for yourself. If you’re navigating divorce, grief, or emotional wounds in midlife, this conversation will help you reconnect with God, reclaim joy, and move forward lighter and freer.

(Primary keyword: forgiveness after 40 — used naturally throughout)

(00:00) Holiday reflections, grief, and why forgiveness matters

(04:15) Lessons learned through chaos and childhood stories

(10:40) Teaching through stories instead of advice

(16:05) Why forgiveness accelerates healing and growth

(20:50) Core wounds, stillness, and listening for God

(27:30) A faith-based practice for forgiveness and release

(35:10) Letting God judge instead of carrying anger

(41:45) Forgiveness, health, and emotional freedom

(48:20) Forgiving without an apology and finding peace

(55:30) Closing reflections and holiday blessing

1. Forgiveness is a healing practice that frees you, not the other person
2. Stillness and prayer help create space to hear God clearly
3. You don’t need an apology to forgive and move forward
4. Carrying anger can impact emotional and physical health
5. Forgiveness opens the door to greater joy, peace, and faith

Lesa Koski is a family law attorney turned mediator, life coach, and host of Doing Life Different. She supports women over 40 navigating divorce, faith, forgiveness, and midlife reinvention with clarity, compassion, and grounded wisdom.

1. Core Wounds Course: JJ Flizanes – https://jjflizanes.com/lesa
2. Sign up for Lesa’s Newsletter: https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
3. Lesa’s Ebook: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0G4B2ZY1W?ref=yb_qv_ov_kndl_dp_rw
4. Podcast Episode Mentioned: Andy Bull interview on forgiveness and healing (search within the show archive)
5. Andi Bull's episode: https://player.captivate.fm/episode/e87157ca-599f-4155-9b7e-3d577d1ee81d/
6. Join my Divorce Clarity community!

forgiveness after 40, forgiveness and faith, healing after divorce, midlife forgiveness, emotional healing, Christian forgiveness, letting go of anger, core wounds healing, faith and mindset, women over 40, doing life different

Menopause and divorce can feel overwhelming, but they don’t have to break you. In this powerful conversation, we explore menopause and divorce as opportunities for growth, healing, and self-love. Host Lesa Koski shares her personal menopause journey alongside Coach Tracy, unpacking how hormonal changes, mindset, anxiety, weight gain, and emotional regulation intersect during midlife. This episode reframes menopause and divorce as chapters—not endings—and offers practical tools to help women navigate this season with clarity, compassion, and confidence. If you’re facing menopause, divorce, or both, this conversation will help you feel less alone and more empowered.

(00:00) Introduction to menopause, divorce, and midlife transitions

(03:15) Why menopause and divorce often overlap during midlife

(07:42) Weight gain, loss of control, and learning self-acceptance

(12:30) Menopause as a physiological and emotional circumstance

(17:10) Metabolic health, hormones, and mindset explained

(22:45) Anxiety, panic, and changing your relationship with your thoughts

(28:30) The role of self-love, shame, and acceptance in healing

(33:50) Hormone testing, functional medicine, and natural support options

(39:20) Why menopause can be an opportunity instead of a setback

(44:10) Final encouragement for women navigating menopause and divorce

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• Menopause and divorce are life circumstances, not personal failures
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• Hormonal changes impact mental, emotional, and metabolic health
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• Mindset plays a powerful role in how menopause symptoms are experienced
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• Anxiety is often driven by thought patterns—not permanent conditions
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• Midlife can be a season of self-love, growth, and reinvention
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Coach Tracy is a life coach specializing in mindset, metabolic health, and emotional resilience for women navigating major life transitions. Through her coaching programs and tools, she helps women understand the connection between thoughts, feelings, hormones, and behavior—empowering them to move through menopause, anxiety, and midlife change with clarity and confidence.

Guest Bio: Coach Tracy is a master life and weight coach and the creator of the Self-Made U™ method and planner, where she helps high-achieving women and men learn how to manage their minds, regulate emotions, and create results from the inside out. As Lesa’s longtime coach, Tracy has walked alongside her through breast cancer, major life transitions, and the process of “doing life different,” equipping her with tools that now support women in midlife all over the world.

Resource Links:

• Learn more about coaching with Lesa Koski
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• Listen to more episodes of Doing Life Different:
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• Self-Made U™ Planner & tools from Coach Tracy:
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• Free Feelings Wheel (to help you name emotions)

menopause and divorce, menopause mindset, midlife healing, divorce recovery for women, menopause weight gain, anxiety and menopause, metabolic health women, hormone balance, midlife transformation, women over 40, menopause support, divorce coaching, emotional wellness midlife

Midlife mindset, stress relief, and emotional healing for women over 40. In this episode, we explore how to shift your midlife mindset, lower stress, and stop white-knuckling your way through life. Host Lesa Koski and her coach, Coach Tracy, unpack the beliefs that keep women stuck in “it has to be hard” mode and show you how slowing down can actually lead to better results in your health, relationships, and emotional well-being.

You’ll hear how Lesa’s breast cancer journey forced her into stillness, why cortisol and hormones matter more than we think, and how tools like daily self-coaching and intentional planning can transform your midlife mindset. If you’ve ever felt like you’re grinding through your days, pushing harder but feeling worse, this conversation will help you see a softer, more sustainable way forward.

Listen in to learn how to name your emotions without judgment, examine the thoughts driving them, and give yourself permission to move at a healthier pace—without losing your ambition or your identity. This episode is a powerful invitation to reframe your midlife mindset and start doing life different.

Timestamps:

(00:00) Introduction to why we make life harder than it needs to be

(03:10) Lesa’s breast cancer story and the surprising power of stillness

(07:45) White-knuckling, overachieving, and the “no pain, no gain” myth

(13:20) Cortisol, hormones, and why stress can block weight loss and healing

(18:50) The courage to slow down and sit with your emotions

(23:30) Naming feelings, stopping judgment, and shifting core beliefs

(29:05) Using intentional planning to decide how you want to feel

(34:40) Practical micro-steps to create more ease in everyday life

(39:10) Final encouragement: it doesn’t have to be hard & how to get support

Key Takeaways:

1. Ease can create better results than effort. Slowing down, resting, and listening to your body often leads to deeper healing and more sustainable progress than constant pushing.
2. Your thoughts—not your circumstances—create your emotional experience. When you can name what you’re feeling and see the belief behind it, you can finally change it.
3. Stress and cortisol matter. White-knuckling, over-fasting, and over-training can backfire, especially for midlife women, by raising cortisol and blocking physical and emotional results.
4. Stillness takes courage, not weakness. Sitting with your emotions, instead of fixing or judging them, is a powerful way to lower stress and reclaim your peace.
5. You can decide how you want to feel ahead of time. Intentional planning—choosing your desired feeling and thought before events—can transform everything from social gatherings to work commitments.

Guest Bio:

Coach Tracy is a master life and weight coach and the creator of the Self-Made U™ method and planner, where she helps high-achieving women and men learn how to manage their minds, regulate emotions, and create results from the inside out. As Lesa’s longtime coach, Tracy has walked alongside her through breast cancer, major life transitions, and the process of “doing life different,” equipping her with tools that now support women in midlife all over the world.

Resource Links:

• Learn more about coaching with Lesa Koski
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• 
  
• 
  
• Listen to more episodes of Doing Life Different:
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• 
  
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• Self-Made U™ Planner & tools from Coach Tracy:
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• Free Feelings Wheel (to help you name emotions)

Tags/Keywords:

midlife mindset, midlife women, women over 40, emotional health, stress management, cortisol and weight, breast cancer survivor, slowing down, overwhelm, burnout, mindset coaching, life coaching for women, stillness, white knuckling life, doing life different, Lesa Koski, Coach Tracy, self coaching, emotional regulation, perimenopause, menopause, Christian coach, healing journey, planner for women, personal growth, women’s mental health, midlife reinvention, lifestyle podcast, Spotify podcast, YouTube podcast