Doing Divorce Different with Lesa Koski

1. Book a coaching session with Lesa:
2. Find More From Lesa Here!
3. Sign up for my newsletter https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
4. Marrie Simpson’s Metabolic Reset
5. jjflizanes.com/lesa
6. Sign up for my newsletter! https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
7. Ebook https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0G4B2ZY1W?ref=yb_qv_ov_kndl_dp_rw
8. Divorce Clarity 40+ Community

How to Process Unwanted Feelings After 40 | The S.O.U.L. Method for Emotional Clarity

Unwanted feelings after 40 can feel overwhelming—especially during divorce or emotional seasons. In this episode, Lesa shares her S.O.U.L. Method to calm emotions, regulate your nervous system, and move forward with clarity. Learn how to process unwanted feelings, set boundaries, and choose aligned action with faith-based support. This episode is for women navigating divorce, emotional overwhelm, and midlife transitions who want clarity instead of chaos.

(00:00) Why unwanted feelings surface during the holidays

(05:12) Introducing the S.O.U.L. Method

(10:08) Stillness and surrendering emotions to God

(18:30) Identifying beliefs behind your feelings

(26:15) Using empathy and strengths on yourself

(34:40) Aligned action and setting guilt-free boundaries

(41:50) Divorce Clarity 40+ community invitation

1. Unwanted feelings are signals, not failures
2. Stillness helps regulate emotional overwhelm
3. Questioning beliefs reduces suffering
4. Boundaries are an act of self-respect
5. Small aligned actions build self-trust

Lesa Koski is a former family law attorney turned mediator, divorce coach, and mindset coach. She helps women over 40 navigate divorce, emotional overwhelm, and midlife transitions with clarity, faith, and grounded decision-making.

1. Book a coaching session with Lesa:
2. Find More From Lesa Here!
3. Sign up for my newsletter https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
4. Marrie Simpson’s Metabolic Reset
5. jjflizanes.com/lesa
6. Sign up for my newsletter! https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
7. Ebook https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0G4B2ZY1W?ref=yb_qv_ov_kndl_dp_rw
8. Divorce Clarity 40+ Community

divorce clarity, unwanted feelings, emotional regulation, women over 40, divorce mindset, faith and healing, boundaries after divorce, midlife emotional health, soul method, divorce support for women

Forgiveness After 40: How Letting Go Heals Your Heart, Body & Faith

Forgiveness after 40 can unlock emotional healing, peace, and renewed faith. In this heartfelt holiday episode, Lesa Koski shares how forgiveness changed her life and helped her release anger, anxiety, and judgment. Through personal stories, faith-based reflection, and practical steps, this episode explores forgiveness as a path to healing—not for others, but for yourself. If you’re navigating divorce, grief, or emotional wounds in midlife, this conversation will help you reconnect with God, reclaim joy, and move forward lighter and freer.

(Primary keyword: forgiveness after 40 — used naturally throughout)

(00:00) Holiday reflections, grief, and why forgiveness matters

(04:15) Lessons learned through chaos and childhood stories

(10:40) Teaching through stories instead of advice

(16:05) Why forgiveness accelerates healing and growth

(20:50) Core wounds, stillness, and listening for God

(27:30) A faith-based practice for forgiveness and release

(35:10) Letting God judge instead of carrying anger

(41:45) Forgiveness, health, and emotional freedom

(48:20) Forgiving without an apology and finding peace

(55:30) Closing reflections and holiday blessing

1. Forgiveness is a healing practice that frees you, not the other person
2. Stillness and prayer help create space to hear God clearly
3. You don’t need an apology to forgive and move forward
4. Carrying anger can impact emotional and physical health
5. Forgiveness opens the door to greater joy, peace, and faith

Lesa Koski is a family law attorney turned mediator, life coach, and host of Doing Life Different. She supports women over 40 navigating divorce, faith, forgiveness, and midlife reinvention with clarity, compassion, and grounded wisdom.

1. Core Wounds Course: JJ Flizanes – https://jjflizanes.com/lesa
2. Sign up for Lesa’s Newsletter: https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj
3. Lesa’s Ebook: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0G4B2ZY1W?ref=yb_qv_ov_kndl_dp_rw
4. Podcast Episode Mentioned: Andy Bull interview on forgiveness and healing (search within the show archive)
5. Andi Bull's episode: https://player.captivate.fm/episode/e87157ca-599f-4155-9b7e-3d577d1ee81d/
6. Join my Divorce Clarity community!

forgiveness after 40, forgiveness and faith, healing after divorce, midlife forgiveness, emotional healing, Christian forgiveness, letting go of anger, core wounds healing, faith and mindset, women over 40, doing life different

Menopause and divorce can feel overwhelming, but they don’t have to break you. In this powerful conversation, we explore menopause and divorce as opportunities for growth, healing, and self-love. Host Lesa Koski shares her personal menopause journey alongside Coach Tracy, unpacking how hormonal changes, mindset, anxiety, weight gain, and emotional regulation intersect during midlife. This episode reframes menopause and divorce as chapters—not endings—and offers practical tools to help women navigate this season with clarity, compassion, and confidence. If you’re facing menopause, divorce, or both, this conversation will help you feel less alone and more empowered.

(00:00) Introduction to menopause, divorce, and midlife transitions

(03:15) Why menopause and divorce often overlap during midlife

(07:42) Weight gain, loss of control, and learning self-acceptance

(12:30) Menopause as a physiological and emotional circumstance

(17:10) Metabolic health, hormones, and mindset explained

(22:45) Anxiety, panic, and changing your relationship with your thoughts

(28:30) The role of self-love, shame, and acceptance in healing

(33:50) Hormone testing, functional medicine, and natural support options

(39:20) Why menopause can be an opportunity instead of a setback

(44:10) Final encouragement for women navigating menopause and divorce

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• Menopause and divorce are life circumstances, not personal failures
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• Hormonal changes impact mental, emotional, and metabolic health
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• Mindset plays a powerful role in how menopause symptoms are experienced
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• Anxiety is often driven by thought patterns—not permanent conditions
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• Midlife can be a season of self-love, growth, and reinvention
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Coach Tracy is a life coach specializing in mindset, metabolic health, and emotional resilience for women navigating major life transitions. Through her coaching programs and tools, she helps women understand the connection between thoughts, feelings, hormones, and behavior—empowering them to move through menopause, anxiety, and midlife change with clarity and confidence.

Guest Bio: Coach Tracy is a master life and weight coach and the creator of the Self-Made U™ method and planner, where she helps high-achieving women and men learn how to manage their minds, regulate emotions, and create results from the inside out. As Lesa’s longtime coach, Tracy has walked alongside her through breast cancer, major life transitions, and the process of “doing life different,” equipping her with tools that now support women in midlife all over the world.

Resource Links:

• Learn more about coaching with Lesa Koski
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• Listen to more episodes of Doing Life Different:
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• Self-Made U™ Planner & tools from Coach Tracy:
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• Free Feelings Wheel (to help you name emotions)

menopause and divorce, menopause mindset, midlife healing, divorce recovery for women, menopause weight gain, anxiety and menopause, metabolic health women, hormone balance, midlife transformation, women over 40, menopause support, divorce coaching, emotional wellness midlife

Midlife mindset, stress relief, and emotional healing for women over 40. In this episode, we explore how to shift your midlife mindset, lower stress, and stop white-knuckling your way through life. Host Lesa Koski and her coach, Coach Tracy, unpack the beliefs that keep women stuck in “it has to be hard” mode and show you how slowing down can actually lead to better results in your health, relationships, and emotional well-being.

You’ll hear how Lesa’s breast cancer journey forced her into stillness, why cortisol and hormones matter more than we think, and how tools like daily self-coaching and intentional planning can transform your midlife mindset. If you’ve ever felt like you’re grinding through your days, pushing harder but feeling worse, this conversation will help you see a softer, more sustainable way forward.

Listen in to learn how to name your emotions without judgment, examine the thoughts driving them, and give yourself permission to move at a healthier pace—without losing your ambition or your identity. This episode is a powerful invitation to reframe your midlife mindset and start doing life different.

Timestamps:

(00:00) Introduction to why we make life harder than it needs to be

(03:10) Lesa’s breast cancer story and the surprising power of stillness

(07:45) White-knuckling, overachieving, and the “no pain, no gain” myth

(13:20) Cortisol, hormones, and why stress can block weight loss and healing

(18:50) The courage to slow down and sit with your emotions

(23:30) Naming feelings, stopping judgment, and shifting core beliefs

(29:05) Using intentional planning to decide how you want to feel

(34:40) Practical micro-steps to create more ease in everyday life

(39:10) Final encouragement: it doesn’t have to be hard & how to get support

Key Takeaways:

1. Ease can create better results than effort. Slowing down, resting, and listening to your body often leads to deeper healing and more sustainable progress than constant pushing.
2. Your thoughts—not your circumstances—create your emotional experience. When you can name what you’re feeling and see the belief behind it, you can finally change it.
3. Stress and cortisol matter. White-knuckling, over-fasting, and over-training can backfire, especially for midlife women, by raising cortisol and blocking physical and emotional results.
4. Stillness takes courage, not weakness. Sitting with your emotions, instead of fixing or judging them, is a powerful way to lower stress and reclaim your peace.
5. You can decide how you want to feel ahead of time. Intentional planning—choosing your desired feeling and thought before events—can transform everything from social gatherings to work commitments.

Guest Bio:

Coach Tracy is a master life and weight coach and the creator of the Self-Made U™ method and planner, where she helps high-achieving women and men learn how to manage their minds, regulate emotions, and create results from the inside out. As Lesa’s longtime coach, Tracy has walked alongside her through breast cancer, major life transitions, and the process of “doing life different,” equipping her with tools that now support women in midlife all over the world.

Resource Links:

• Learn more about coaching with Lesa Koski
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• Listen to more episodes of Doing Life Different:
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• Self-Made U™ Planner & tools from Coach Tracy:
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• Free Feelings Wheel (to help you name emotions)

Tags/Keywords:

midlife mindset, midlife women, women over 40, emotional health, stress management, cortisol and weight, breast cancer survivor, slowing down, overwhelm, burnout, mindset coaching, life coaching for women, stillness, white knuckling life, doing life different, Lesa Koski, Coach Tracy, self coaching, emotional regulation, perimenopause, menopause, Christian coach, healing journey, planner for women, personal growth, women’s mental health, midlife reinvention, lifestyle podcast, Spotify podcast, YouTube podcast

Today Tracy and I talk about the effects of menopause on women and the correlation between menopause and divorce.  We all know divorce is growing fast in this age category.  You hear my personal struggles in the journey through menopause while Tracy talks about the importance of loving yourself through the process of menopause and taking the time to learn about yourself while going through this transition. Tune in today for some great tips for handling menopause and managing your thoughts through divorce.

In this episode:

[1:54] How to look at menopause and how it compares to divorce. [5:33] Tracy discusses natural hormones and testing hormone levels. [7:50] Look at how your body is reacting as you go through menopause to find the best resources to help and learn more about yourself. [9:05] Signs of being peri-menopausal. Thoughts behind the anxiety. [11:18] Fighting anxiety in the middle of the night. [16:10] The real problem is how you are thinking about menopause - that creates action or in-action. 

Key Takeaways:

Release the grip on trying to control something you can’t. Menopause is going to happen regardless; it is a circumstance of life. Take the opportunity to learn about yourself. Learn to love who you are, and love your mind. Notice how you feel about anxiety. The more your thoughts go to shame, the worse you will feel about it. Anxiety can be something you have, such as the color of your eyes or hair. It doesn’t have to mean anything about you. Understanding your physical, emotional, mental, and metabolic health is all important. Generally, we understand our physical, emotional, and mental health, but during this time, we need to focus on understanding our metabolic health.

Quotes:

“The journey that I have taken, and what I have learned, and how I have begun to love myself, more than I did when my body was perfect in my twenties. You know, I like, it’s been such an amazing experience, and I’m so thankful that there was no action I could take to get those pounds off; I had to just sit there…I had to sit and learn to love myself.” - Lesa Koski

“Use this opportunity to learn about yourself. Start with what is making me feel this way. A hundred percent of the time, it is the thought you are operating from; you’ve got to get a hold of that. That awareness is going to really support you and change the way you feel.” - Tracy Pleschourt

Guest Bio:

Tracy Pleschourt, the Founder of Self-Made U, helps men and women create Self-Made wealth and wellness through life coaching. Tracy has mastered and now teaches the critical skills necessary to manage your mind and overcome any obstacle, including overeating, overdrinking, time management, and career & relationship changes.

Resources:

Tracy Pleschourt Instagram

Tracy Pleschourt Website

Tracy Pleschourt Facebook

Tracy Pleschourt LinkedIn

The Menopause Reset Book

Dutch Test

Mind Math Formula - Tool For Anxiety

Stillness, midlife anxiety, Christian mindset, healing, surrender, and purpose—this episode dives into stillness as the first daily shift to heal your mindset. Stillness is the doorway to hearing your calling, calming anxiety, and reconnecting with God when life feels loud and out of control.

In this solo episode, host and author Lesa Koski shares how stillness became the unexpected beginning of her healing journey after a breast cancer diagnosis. She walks you through her come-to-Jesus moment in Arizona, the shock of hearing “you have cancer,” and the deep, surprising peace she found on the morning of her surgery.

You’ll learn why stillness is not passive or weak, but a powerful spiritual and emotional reset that breaks the cycle of overthinking, people-pleasing, and white-knuckling your way through life. Lesa offers real-life tools to help you practice stillness when your mind is spinning—whether you’re facing cancer, divorce, health fears, or simply the quiet ache of a life that feels “too much.”

If you’re a woman over 40 or 50 feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or burned out, this conversation will show you how stillness can become your first daily shift toward peace, purpose, and a more joyful, God-led life. Stillness doesn’t remove the hard things, but it changes how you move through them.

Timestamps:

(00:00) Introduction to stillness as the first daily shift

(02:05) Living in lifelong anxiety, fear, and fight-or-flight

(04:12) The Arizona come-to-Jesus moment and praying for healing

(07:03) The mammogram callback and terrifying biopsy experience

(09:45) Hearing “you have breast cancer” and being forced to stop

(12:18) Letting go of control and surrendering outcomes to God

(14:40) Crying on hay bales, walking in the woods, and praying through fear

(17:02) The morning of surgery, malignant hyperthermia, and supernatural peace

(19:30) Why stillness is the foundation of healing and mindset work

(21:08) Practical tools to access stillness when your mind is spinning

(23:05) Using the feelings wheel and Scripture to name and process emotions

(24:15) How to get Lesa’s ebook, newsletter, and next steps for your healing journey

Key Takeaways:

• Stillness is the first daily shift that opens the door to hearing your calling and healing your mindset.
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• A crisis (like cancer, divorce, or a child in trouble) can force you into stillness—and that stillness can become holy ground.
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• You can’t control outcomes, but you can control how you move through hard seasons by surrendering to God.
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• Stillness isn’t about doing nothing; it’s about feeling your feelings, noticing God’s presence, and interrupting anxiety’s momentum.
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• Simple practices—walking, crying in a safe place, grounding in your body, and using a feelings wheel—can help you access stillness even in the middle of chaos.
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Guest Bio:

Lesa Koski is an attorney/mediator, podcast host, breast cancer survivor, and author of 5 Daily Shifts to Hear Your Calling and Heal Your Mindset. She helps women over 40 and 50 move from anxiety and overwhelm into peace, purpose, and God-led confidence by teaching practical, faith-centered mindset tools and daily shifts that support midlife reinvention.

Resource Links:

• 📘 5 Daily Shifts to Hear Your Calling and Heal Your Mindset (ebook)
• 🎁 Free Feelings Wheel Download: https://www.lesakoski.com
• 💌 Join Lesa’s Newsletter & Request a Free Copy of the Ebook:
• 🎙 Doing Life Different Podcast & Resources: https://www.lesakoski.com

Tags/Keywords:

stillness, stillness practice, midlife anxiety, Christian mindset, women over 40, women over 50, breast cancer survivor, healing journey, faith and anxiety, surrender to God, mindset healing, daily shifts, hear your calling, Christian podcast, women’s mental health, nervous system calm, resilience, midlife reinvention, emotional healing, doing life different, lesa koski

Confident life, faith, clarity, and rewriting your story—this empowering conversation with attorney Hannah Hembree Bell shows women how to move from feeling stuck to building a confident life they truly love. If you’ve ever settled for “fine,” felt disconnected from yourself, or questioned whether you deserve more, this episode will speak directly to your heart.

Hannah, founder of My Confident Divorce, shares her powerful journey from small-town bride and overwhelmed young mother to attorney, mother of four, and mentor to women seeking a confident life rooted in courage, identity, and truth. Together, we explore how to recognize when you’re stuck, how women lose themselves in motherhood and marriage, and why faith is essential when stepping into a confident life filled with meaning and purpose.

You’ll learn Hannah’s five-step framework for creating a confident life—whether you choose to stay, pursue a confident divorce, or completely reinvent your identity in midlife. Her story will inspire you to believe you deserve joy, clarity, and a confident life where your dreams, needs, and voice finally matter.

If you’re longing for confidence, craving direction, or ready to rebuild your life with intention, this episode will give you hope and practical tools to begin again.

(Main keyword used: confident life)

(00:00) Introduction to Hannah Hembree Bell & My Confident Divorce

(02:15) “I think I’ve made a terrible mistake”—Hannah’s early marriage story

(05:42) Baby having babies: motherhood masking deeper issues

(08:30) The Facebook scroll moment that woke her up

(11:05) The “medium suck” life & signs you’re truly stuck

(14:18) Mental health, truth-telling & the first permission slip: “You deserve a happy life”

(17:40) Betting on yourself & stepping toward a confident life

(20:55) The cost of going into divorce depleted and unprepared

(24:32) Jury trial, custody, and rebuilding life after losing primary parenting time

(28:10) Why Hannah now helps women create a confident life

(30:45) Divorce as an on-ramp to a new life (and other wake-up calls: death, illness, job loss)

(33:02) Why women struggle to believe they deserve happiness

(36:15) Derivative identity: wife/mom vs. who you truly are

(39:05) Empty nest, gray divorce & midlife reinvention

(41:22) How to rediscover what you enjoy & who you are

(44:10) The “joy journal” + following breadcrumb interests

(46:38) Hannah’s 5-step framework for designing a confident life

(50:05) Step 1: Proclaiming you deserve a fulfilled, joyful life

(52:00) Step 2: Start with the end in mind—your future self

(53:40) Step 3: Honest inventory of what isn’t working

(55:12) Step 4: Identify your biggest constraint

(56:20) Step 5: Take the next right step toward a confident life

(57:30) Final encouragement: it’s never too late to start over

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• A confident life starts with believing you deserve happiness, purpose, and joy.
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• A “medium suck” life is still misaligned—and a powerful signal that it’s time for change.
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• Women often lose themselves in a derivative identity (wife/mom). True confidence comes from knowing who you are apart from roles.
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• Faith and clarity are essential when stepping into a confident life or confident divorce.
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• You can rebuild your identity through small steps: awareness, inventory, identifying constraints, and taking bold, aligned action.
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Hannah Hembree Bell is an award-winning Austin family law attorney, mom of four, and founder and CEO of one of the fastest-growing family law firms in the country, Hembree Bell Law. After experiencing her own difficult divorce and custody battle, she built a framework to help women avoid the same mistakes. Today, through her firm and her national education community, My Confident Divorce, Hannah equips women with the strategy and tools they need to protect their kids, finances, and future.

Find Hannah at hannahhembreebell.com and her law firm at hembreebell.com 

Access Hannah’s free divorce guide at MyConfidentDivorce.com 

Listen to Hannah’s new podcast at notsavingitforlater.com 

Find More From Lesa Here!

Sign up for my newsletter

confident life, confident divorce, women of faith, Christian women, starting over in midlife, rewrite your story, women over 40, women’s empowerment, finding clarity, getting unstuck, identity after motherhood, midlife reinvention, divorce support, gray divorce, emotional courage, life purpose, faith and confidence, healing after divorce, personal growth for women, Lesa Koski, Doing Life Different, My Confident Divorce, courage to change

Joy, aging well, midlife mindset shifts, and vibrant living—this Saddle Up segment dives into the real tools women need to feel more joyful, purposeful, and empowered. In this episode, Lesa shares four practical steps to experience more joy daily, inspired by her powerful conversation with 67-year-old competitive athlete and ballroom dancer Robin Kencel. Learn how meaning, mindset, judgment, and surrender impact your ability to live joyfully after 40. This episode will help you rethink joy, deepen purpose, and take simple steps toward a more vibrant, aligned life.

In this conversation, you’ll hear how joy connects to purpose, why joy is a choice, how joy grows when judgment stops, and the mindset shifts that create more joy in midlife and beyond.

(00:00) Introduction to joy, aging well & vibrant living

(01:12) Lessons from podcast guest Robin Kencel

(03:15) Joy comes from meaning and purpose

(05:24) Why joy is a choice (and how small shifts change everything)

(08:06) The “pick your joy” mindset and tiny habit building

(11:10) How judgment steals your joy

(13:20) Rewiring old thought patterns in midlife

(15:18) Surrender: letting go of the oars

(17:30) A simple thought that instantly brings more peace

(19:02) Episode recap: the 4 steps to grow joy every day

(20:12) Closing encouragement & next week’s guest tease

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• Joy comes from meaning and purpose—alignment creates energy and ease.
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• Joy is a choice, built through daily mindset decisions.
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• Judgment blocks joy, both self-judgment and judging others.
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• Surrender allows clarity—letting go of urgency creates immediate peace.
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• Small steps compound, making joy and well-being more sustainable.
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Robin Kencel isn’t just breaking records—she’s redefining what it means to age with purpose. She is the reigning Ms. Senior Connecticut and finished third runner-up in the national Ms. Senior America competition. A seven-time U.S. Pro-Am Ballroom Champion, Robin draws on decades of competitive dance experience to inspire others to stay active, confident, and spiritually grounded at any age.

Her philosophy blends faith, fitness, and mindset, encouraging women to embrace every season of life with grace and joy.

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• Listen to the full episode with Robin Kencel (Tuesday’s main show)
• Join the Doing Life Different Newsletter here!
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• Follow the Saddle Up Segment for weekly inspiration
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joy, midlife joy, aging well, women over 40, mindset shifts, purpose and meaning, vibrant living, midlife wellness, surrender mindset, stop judging, emotional health, personal growth, women’s empowerment, joy tools, aging with confidence, Saddle Up segment, Lesa Koski, Doing Life Different, midlife coaching