Between Now And Next - A Podcast for Caregivers

If you're standing on the other side of a hard, sacred day, whether that's spreading ashes, closing out an estate, or any goodbye you had to carry out by hand, this episode is for you. You already know there's no itinerary for grief, no matter how much you wish there were.

What We Cover

• What actually happened on the day, the walk, the release, the flowers, and why it felt final in a way nothing before it had.
• Why I didn't want more time in the way people expect, the honest, complicated truth about not wishing for more time with parents who were suffering.
• What I wish I had known going in, from choosing the right vessel to deciding in advance what words or moments mattered to me.
• Why support doesn't stop after the day is over: therapy, support groups, and giving yourself space instead of filling it back up.
• What the other side of this actually feels like: lighter, but not finished, and why that's allowed.

This Episode Is For You If...

• You have a hard, sacred day coming that you can't fully prepare for no matter how much you plan.
• You've felt guilty for not wishing for more time with someone who was suffering.
• You want to know what to actually think through before a similar day: vessel, location, words, who to include.
• You're on the other side of a loss milestone and wondering if what you're feeling now is normal.

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

If you have a loved one's ashes still waiting to be spread, or a wish they told you about years ago that you haven't found the time or the readiness to carry out, this episode is for you. You already know what it feels like to carry something that heavy for as long as it takes.

What We Cover

• Why "knowing" and "doing" are different things, carrying out a loved one's wishes long after they've passed, and giving yourself permission to wait until you're ready.
• What it actually felt like to fly with my father's ashes, the TSA process, the surreal slow motion of it, and the grief that showed up.
• How planning mode kicked in afterward, the real decisions involved: location, regulations, timing, and personal preference.
• Why doing it with someone else made it easier, not lighter, but easier to carry.
• What the day before looked like, the quiet, the checking, the holding on before letting go.

This Episode Is For You If...

•  You have ashes, belongings, or a wish of a loved one's that you still haven't acted on, and you're not sure that's a problem.
• You're dreading or anticipating a task tied to your loved one's passing that you know is coming but haven't scheduled.
• You've wondered what it's actually like, logistically, to travel with a loved one's remains.
• You're the one who ends up carrying the planning, even while you're still grieving.

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

If you love someone who needs care but you live a few hours, a few states, or even a country away, this episode is for you. You're not the one handling the day to day, the doctor's appointments, the middle of the night decisions, but that doesn't mean you're not carrying something too.

What We Cover

• Why “let me know if you need anything” actually adds weight to a caregiver's plate instead of lifting it, and what to offer instead.
• How to find the one thing you can take completely off someone's plate, whether that's insurance calls, groceries, meals, or bills.
• Why offering a break is one of the hardest things to give and receive, and how to make it easier to accept.
• How to build a shared decision process with the primary caregiver instead of weighing in from a distance without the full picture.
• How to visit without adding to the load, and where to find support for your own guilt about the distance.

This Episode Is For You If...

• You've said “let me know if you need anything” and never heard back, or you've been the one hearing it and felt more overwhelmed, not less.
• You're carrying guilt or shame about the distance, or about the reasons you can't close it.
• You want to help the person doing the day to day but you're not sure what would actually make a difference.
• You've found yourself second guessing a decision you weren't there for.

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

There's a specific kind of loneliness that comes from being the one who always shows up. Not because you're an only child. Not because there's no one else. But because family exists. Siblings, extended family, people who love the same person you're caring for. And somehow the weight still lands almost entirely on you.

This episode is for the caregiver who is functionally alone, even when they technically aren't. The one making decisions by themselves, sitting in waiting rooms by themselves, carrying information and history and grief by themselves, while managing not just the caregiving, but the relationships around it too. That experience is real, it's common, and it rarely gets named. Today we're naming it.

WHAT YOU'LL LEARN

• Why unequal caregiving is more common than most people realize, and how it usually forms without anyone fully deciding it
• The difference between logistical reasons for imbalance and the deeper relational dynamics that can drive it
• The emotional reality of being in the middle: loneliness, resentment, guilt, shame, grief, and what it costs to carry all of it quietly
• How to think about communication and decision-making when the family dynamic is complex
• What it looks like to set limits on managing everyone else's feelings, and why that matters as much as any practical strategy
• How grief after caregiving can look completely different for the person who was in it every day versus everyone else

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

You're showing up. You're doing everything you can. And the person you're caring for is telling you no. No to the help, no to the doctor, no to the plan. Maybe they're frustrated. Maybe they're scared. Maybe they feel like caregiving is the last thing standing between them and the life they used to have. Whatever the reason — you're left holding it, and it's exhausting.

Resistance can be a common experiencing in caregiving. In this episode, I'll share what it looks like, where it comes from, and how to navigate it without losing yourself or your relationship with the person you love. Because working with the resistance, instead of against it can help. 

WHAT YOU'LL LEARN

• The different forms resistance takes — from mild pushback to full refusal — and why they aren't all the same
• What's usually underneath the resistance: fear, exhaustion, grief, and the need to hold onto some sense of control
• How to shift your approach — asking what they want instead of presenting what you think they need
• When to keep showing up, when to give space, and when the situation calls for a harder call
• The two questions that can anchor you when you don't know what to do next: what do they want, and what do they need to be safe
• Why guilt is not a reliable guide — and what to ask yourself instead

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

If you are the one who is there, showing up every day, holding all the information, making the calls, managing the communication, and you're doing most of it without consistent nearby support, this episode is for you. We're talking about what it actually means to carry the invisible load of caregiving alone, what that costs you emotionally and practically, and what support can actually look like when you're deep in it.

What You'll Learn

• What the invisible load really is and why it goes so far beyond the tasks people can see from the outside.
• Why outward communication is its own job and how being the point of contact for everyone adds to a load that's already full
• What the emotional reality actually looks like: guilt, helplessness, fear, loneliness, and resentment, named plainly and without judgment
• What help actually looks like and the difference between what people offer and what actually moves the needle
• How to protect yourself practically and emotionally, without waiting until you're completely depleted

THIS EPISODE IS FOR YOU IF...

• You are the primary caregiver in your family, and there isn't anyone nearby who is sharing the weight at the same level you are
• You've heard "let me know if you need anything" more times than you can count and it hasn't actually helped.
• You're managing your loved one's care while also managing your home, your work, your relationships, and your own life — and none of those things have stopped.
• You've felt resentment and felt bad or guilty because you did

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

Caregiving doesn't wait for a convenient moment. It doesn't check in with your career, your timeline, or the life you were in the middle of building. It just arrives. And for a lot of people, it arrives before they ever feel ready, before their savings make sense, before their kids are grown, before they've finished school or figured out who they are yet. Or after all of that, it still wasn’t a “good” time. Caregiving is hard, and depending on where you are in life, it can be even more challenging. 

This episode is about that. The weight of becoming a caregiver at the "wrong" time. What it costs you practically and emotionally, and why the timing of caregiving adds its own layer of grief that rarely gets named. Today, we're naming it and giving that experience the space it actually deserves.

WHAT YOU'LL LEARN

• The four ways caregiving enters your life and why timing shapes everything that follows
• The double grief that rarely gets named: grieving your loved one and grieving the version of your own life you had to set aside
• Why guilt, resentment, and 'what if' thinking are normal, and what suppressing them actually costs you
• What does survival mode do to your body, your focus, and your ability to see past today
• One honest step toward acknowledging what you've lost without rushing toward fixing it

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

Not every caregiving story starts from a place of closeness. For many of us, caregiving happens within relationships that are already carrying the weight of unresolved history, emotional distance, or a family dynamic that was complicated long before anyone needed care.

In this episode, we're talking about what it actually looks like to navigate caregiving inside those relationships. That means the relationship with the person you're caring for, sibling dynamics that are absent, unequal, or in conflict, and the broader family and community web that pulls on you, whether it's helping or not.

This is also a personal one. I'm sharing part of my own story, what it meant to step into caregiving largely alone, within a family with its own particular shape, and what I felt when I realized that was just the reality I was working within.

You don't have to have a perfect relationship to be a good caregiver. This episode is for everyone who has ever shown up for someone while also wishing things were different.

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

You've started the conversation. Now what? What should you actually ask?

In this episode, I share my experience learning my parents' wishes by listening and watching, and the cost of not having things documented legally. I walk through 6 essential categories of questions that can help you prepare and reduce future stress. You'll learn what questions to ask in each category, why each one matters, and how to take it one conversation at a time.

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.

In this episode, I share my experience trying to have these (health, aging, end of life) conversations with my parents: what made them hard, the cost of not having legal documentation, and how to approach them imperfectly.

Key Takeaway: Pick one conversation prompt this week and try it to open the door with your loved one or even friend (if you want to try it on someone else, non-family first). 

This episode is for anyone hesitant to start or who tried, and it didn't go as well as you'd have hoped. 

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it. Want to share your story or ask a question?  Reach out on Substack — I'd love to hear where this lands for you.

📖 Read + connect: betweennowandnext.substack.com

📸 Follow along: instagram.com/betweennowandnext

🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify so you don't miss what's coming next.

This show reflects personal experience and is for informational purposes only. I'm not a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional, so please consult a qualified professional for advice specific to your situation.