Beyond Hope

Hi everyone, it has been a little while since I've recorded an episode but this will be worth the wait. I'm sharing with you an interview that I did with James Healy. I am lucky to call him a friend, but also we work together.

He produces my podcast and every time I talk to him, I'm laughing and learning something new about him. Just prepare to be inspired.

Before I dive into that interview I want to just let you know how much you mean to me. Thank you for listening and thank you for sharing this journey with me. I'm always sending so much love to you and to your loved ones and just sending you so much hope.

And I just want to remind you that I know how painful this journey is, but I do feel like we have been chosen for a reason and this absolute faith and trust that we are exactly where we're supposed to be right now and just know that. You're not alone. There is an army of moms out there who are loving on you and supporting you from afar.

James shares some things from his history and it reminded me of something, a story which I also share at the start of this episode.

During our chat, James reveals some fun facts I did not know about him, along with some of his most challenging moments in life, and how he has created a rich, full, and joyful life in sobriety.

He helps us understand some of the fears and struggles those in recovery deal with, and gives us a few ideas on how to cope with them. James also emphasizes that recovery success must truly be desired to be found and that each path is unique for every person.

As always, love and best wishes, Shar
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More info for James Hamilton Healy:
Podcast: https://recoveryinnovatorsradio.com
Facebook: https://facebook.com/jameshamiltonhealy
Twitter: https://twitter.com/jameshhealy
LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/jameshhealy
Instagram: @jameshhealy
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Find out more about Beyond Hope Radio:
Web - http://beyondhoperadio.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/beyondhoperadio/
YouTube - http://beyondhoperadio.com/youtube

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Show sponsor:

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

Welcome to this show. I am here in Long Beach, Washington, which is about three hours from my home and I came here for a couple of nights over the memorial day weekend, just kind of packed up my dog and he and I hit the road and we've been staying here for a couple of nights. We leave tomorrow, but it's been really good.

I have been doing a lot of walking on the beach and a lot of reflecting. The last time I was here I was visiting my daughter. She attended treatment out here a couple of years ago and I was just thinking back to that time and what was happening then and I think I thought I was going to be a lot more impacted emotionally by being here.

But actually, I've felt a lot of peace. I think the hardest part for me was the actual drive here. There are so many twists and turns to the drive and so many memorable points, going around these different curves and turns and then seeing the water and the trees and going over this certain bridge and all these sorts of things to get you here.

I made so many drives here while she was attending treatment There were a couple of times where I actually would drive here and back in one day. And I remember feeling so hopeful and inspired, watching the progress that was happening. When she came here she went to detox at a hospital, which is about an hour from here and they transported her to the treatment center after the detox program ended.

I just remember what that entailed to get her to detox during that time. And that was a very, very difficult time. She was withdrawing so bad and she was such a flight risk and just waiting for the bed to open up and having to basically just stay with her and keep an eye on her at all times so that she wouldn't run.

She was just literally a bag of bones at that time. She was so thin and making that drive with a withdrawing heroin addict, taking her to the hospital for the detoxing, what that entailed and getting her all the way there and then watching her mind spin as she's changing her mind. She doesn't want to go in and reminding her what got her there...

I just remember this transition at that point was just to this little child. She was so scared and I just remember her being wrapped in a blanket and the tears and her not wanting me to leave.

After the detox program, they then found her a bed at Klean in Long Beach, Washington. They transferred her there and she was there for probably about six weeks or so and I would just come out every weekend and visit her... and that was a really incredible time.

There's something really exciting about when they're in treatment and you feel like they're safe and they're getting their needs met and as a parent being able to go visit them and watching that process. It's when they're getting ready to leave that I think it's the scariest. When she was at Klean, she actually was transported back to King County to deal with some warrant issues, and she relapsed shortly thereafter. So that was not easy.

And it's so crazy when I'm trying to remember back to when that was, but I think it was about two years ago and I remember coming here and she was here over Mother's Day and she had this glass heart bowl and she had collected these heart-shaped rocks. And I remember her giving those to me when I was here and that being a very special time.

Here we are two years later and I feel like right now she is actually further along than she has been. It's like all these little tools that she's picked up along the way are all kind of coming together where she is now.

But if you are like me and you've been through any kind of any of this with the relapsing and the treatment and all of that, we've been going through this for years now, almost six years of actual treatment programs, then, you know, as well as I do, how high the relapse rate is and that that's a very real possibility that she may not complete this program. The cool thing is, is that I have done so much healing that I understand the risk and I am able to truly turn that over to her...

For more of my reflection and thoughts on our journey through this, please listen.

As always, love and best wishes, Shar

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Find out more about Beyond Hope Radio:
Web - http://beyondhoperadio.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/beyondhoperadio/
YouTube - http://beyondhoperadio.com/youtube

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Show sponsor:

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

Listen to this episode as I reveal a Special Announcement!

Yes, I have been absent for a bit as I have been doing some processing lately. I had to take a step back and finally make a big decision.

I felt like I was up against a bit of a wall, a little stuck. And now I am moving forward with an exciting new project...

I am writing a book!

It has been something I have been contemplating for some time and now that I have made the decision and started the process, I am so excited!

Listen to this episode as I talk about the new book and more...

As always, wishing you so much love and joy.

And please reach out if you have any questions or thoughts: [email protected]

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Find out more about Beyond Hope Radio:
Web - http://beyondhoperadio.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/beyondhoperadio/
YouTube - http://beyondhoperadio.com/youtube

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Show sponsor:

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

I am joined by Laura Worley, who is a Transformational and Educational Coach.

Laura has helped hundreds of people overcome their past and begin to live the life of their dreams. It is her core belief that we can overcome anything. When we change our patterns and beliefs that keep us stuck; there are truly infinite possibilities that come into our awareness.

Laura works with me to show how Tapping and EFT can help free us from being stuck in past trauma or experiences.

Trauma has been shown to be a key trigger for addiction and plays a large role in its impact on the family. Substance abuse and the emotional and physical trauma it can bring to everyone touched by it can be devastating.

Laura's techniques have been proven to help people release the hurt an pain of stressful emotions.

Listen to this amazing episode and watch the companion videos on Beyond Hope's YouTube channel here: https://youtu.be/-nbYVh-nfaE

If you would like to connect with Laura see the details below.

Website: http://laurajworley.com/
The Worldwide Transformational Summit -- July 13-22nd, 2018: http://www.wwtsummit.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/laura.worleyfeft
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/lw555551/feed
Free Tapping Gift: https://youtu.be/lYyJew54SN8
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Find out more about Beyond Hope Radio:
Web - http://beyondhoperadio.com
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/beyondhoperadio/
YouTube - http://beyondhoperadio.com/youtube

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Show sponsor:

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

I am joined by Jeff who shares his journey from addict to working with drug abusers on the streets, letting them know that there is hope.

Jeff's story begins in his early teens when, having been raised by missionary parents in a poor family environment, he rebelled against his religious upbringing. He began dealing drugs, rejecting his family, turning to gangs and inevitably got caught in a vicious circle.

Jeff faced major spiritual and emotional questions during this period in his life and he shares his dark and heavy journey when he believed that gangs, drugs, and prison would always be his life.

Looking back now he honestly claims, “I didn't give a sh*t! I just cared about getting high.”

Choices:
The statistics are terrifying, and that's just the reported figures, in this episode Jeff explains how drug addiction can affect anyone, from all walks of life, it is not planned, “nobody wants to be a drug addict when they grow up,” however it is those initial choices that you make that impact your life.

“It was a choice for me to use when I first used, but it became a disease when I couldn't choose not to use it anymore,” explains Jeff who now works on the streets with people that have been caught in this desperate cycle like he once was. It is his passion, he understands their stories because he has lived it too.

Giving Back:
As an ex-addict, Jeff provides parents with clear recovery options and for the past 4 years has followed his clients through their recovery. He points out the growing drug-user population in the States that need help to become sober again but it takes such a massive amount of work, time and sacrifice.

Jeff sees his work as giving back. Helping others through addiction is his passion and his way of making up for his past while living on a humble income. He wants to help people that are lost and out on the streets saying “the desperation is so much more impactful.”

The Bigger Picture:
This episode deals with questions about how to educate the kids that are being drawn into this life, teaching parents how to cope but also asks how the State can help more, how can America not be able to take care of its people?

We discuss the benefits and pitfalls of rehab centers, prison and the approach of the court system to releasing addicts back onto the streets to continue their downward spiral with no support.

Helping Hand:
One of the things Jeff is very clear on is, “never give money”, this will only be spent on drugs. He points us to some really useful information on free resources and tells us all about an organization close to his heart Operation Healthy Hearts who give food, hygiene, clothes etc. to people in exchange for tasks.

“This is not a handout...it's a hand up!”

If you would like to connect with Jeff and his team see the details below. There is hope, you just need to take the first step.

Tel: 714-733-0222
Website: http://foundationsforrecovery.net
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/596522190736544/

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Find out more at http://beyondhoperadio.com

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Show sponsor:

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: Listen for more information!

This episode is part of a mini-series with Chad, a deep dive into some of the core questions and challenges surrounding addiction in some families.

During this episode, we continue the conversation about enabling, what it is, and how we may play a role in our loved one's addiction as a possible enabler.

We also provide tips which may help family members to stop enabling the addict. If you are doing things for your adult son or daughter that is interrupting the natural flow of consequences, then you may be enabling.

Take an honest evaluation and assessment of how you are contributing to their behavior...

But, before you feel bad if you think you may be enabling, it's not just you. There are likely a lot of other people and organizations that are helping this addict get high.

If you have questions or topics you’d like Chad and I to discuss on future episodes, please send your suggestions to [email protected].

About Chad:

Chad works in Admissions and Outreach at Habilitat, Inc. - a long-term (2-year) residential addiction treatment and vocational training program in Hawaii. He's been in Hawaii for the past 7 years, where he initially moved to the islands to treat his heroin addiction through Habilitat's program. Habilitat gave Chad a life worth living.

He enjoys outdoor activities, is an active member of a local Rotary Club, serves on the board of Aloha United Ways - Society of Young Leaders, and enjoys the occasional trip to California to visit family and friends.

Web - https://www.habilitat.com/
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Habilitat/
Phone: 1-800-872-2525

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Find out more at http://beyondhoperadio.com

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Show sponsors:

The Addictions Academy - The Nation’s Leading Accredited Addiction Treatment Services, Recovery/Sober Coaching & Intervention Training Academy: https://theaddictionsacademy.com/

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

This is the first episode of a 6 part mini-series with Chad, a deep dive into some of the core questions and challenges surrounding addiction in some families.

Be sure to tune into Part 2 for an exciting announcement you won’t want to miss!!

So, what is enabling?

As parents, we always want to do what's best for our children. It's always been that way.

But, are we helping or are we enabling? Are we making it easy for them to make poor or good choices? Ask yourself, "How can I enable my child to do the right thing?"

First, it's important to recognize the signs and beware of the "land mines." Try not to get caught up in the addict's timeline and if needed, take a "time out" for yourself so you can get some support.

It can be helpful to prepare in advance for the difficult conversations and go into them with some "go to" phrases. Watch for the manipulation, and remember saying "No" is okay, it doesn't mean you are being a bad parent.

If you have questions or topics you’d like Chad and I to discuss on future episodes, please send your suggestions to [email protected].

About Chad:

Chad works in Admissions and Outreach at Habilitat, Inc. - a long-term (2-year) residential addiction treatment and vocational training program in Hawaii. He's been in Hawaii for the past 7 years, where he initially moved to the islands to treat his heroin addiction through Habilitat's program. Habilitat gave Chad a life worth living.

He enjoys outdoor activities, is an active member of a local Rotary Club, serves on the board of Aloha United Ways - Society of Young Leaders, and enjoys the occasional trip to California to visit family and friends.

Web - https://www.habilitat.com/
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Habilitat/
Phone: 1-800-872-2525

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Find out more at http://beyondhoperadio.com

--
Show sponsors:

The Addictions Academy - The Nation’s Leading Accredited Addiction Treatment Services, Recovery/Sober Coaching & Intervention Training Academy: https://theaddictionsacademy.com/

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

Stephanie Myer, as The Martyr Coach, helps people reclaim their identity and higher purpose so they can stop the self-imposed suffering and start their truth-telling journey.

In her work, she partners with clients to come up with the specific program to meet them where they are at and begin to live life in alignment with who they truly are and always have been at their core. Not who they think they should be for others, or unintentionally taking on traits of others around them.

Unfortunately, many people choose to suffer, not consciously, but somewhat automatically. A martyr tends to be someone who is so intent on helping to try and fix or help others, they neglect their own self-care.

This allows the martyr's internal "garden" to become trampled and damaged, which they then guard, blocking out the good with the bad. The martyr then tires of tending their own garden and puts their focus on tending someone else's, to the detriment of both.

Stephanie explains the Dreaded Drama Triangle as first articulated by Dr. Stephen Karpman in the 1960’s, which describes the different roles of the Victim, the Rescuer, and the Persecutor. She also goes into detail regarding the power of the positive alternative, The Empowerment Dynamic (TED), with the roles focusing on the Creator, the Challenger, and the Coach.
TED allows you to choose to not be a victim and makes room for positive

mindset shifts to happen.

Understanding how these can directly correlate with moms and parents challenged by addiction within their families can help them recognize dysfunctional behaviors and attitudes, which will help set them free to live beyond hope.

Web: http://www.themartyrcoach.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/StephanieMyerTheMartyrCoach/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stephanie-myer-acc-40078379/
Email: [email protected]
Phone: 1-425-530-0329

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Find out more at http://beyondhoperadio.com

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Show sponsors:

The Addictions Academy - The Nation’s Leading Accredited Addiction Treatment Services, Recovery/Sober Coaching & Intervention Training Academy: https://theaddictionsacademy.com/

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

A special edition, this episode spotlights a recovery program which treats the whole person, not just a drug problem. Habilitat's very unique, long-term model remains adaptable to the individual circumstances while creating a small, therapeutic recovery community.

Focusing on a graduated system of responsibility, accountability, and freedom Habilitat tailors the lessons and teaching for individual learning styles.

Studies have shown that longer treatment programs have higher success rates and 100% of Habilitat's graduates have stable housing and a full-time job.

Jeff explains how Habilitat's program works as he details how individuals move from an initial treatment phase to working through re-entry and post re-entry where participants receive vocational training in one of 13 trades.

He also outlines a "typical" day at Habilitat and some of the positive peer pressure strategies employed to help residents keep each other in check and create an extreme sense of self-awareness.

Jeff is the Executive Director of Habilitat, Inc. - a long-term residential addiction treatment and vocational training program, located on the island of Oahu, in Kaneohe, HI. Jeff has an extensive history with Habilitat, dating back to the mid-1980's, where he initially sought treatment as a teenager for his various addictions. Jeff was the Program Director for over 15 years, before transitioning to the Executive Director position.

Jeff enjoys the many local cuisines Hawaii has to offer, is an avid parrot lover and advocate, love snapping photographs with his camera, and giving back to his community. Originally from Dallas, Texas, Jeff has lived in Hawaii for 25 years where he's made the Aloha state his home.

Jeff's hands-on approach to treating the individual has helped thousands of people overcome their issues with substance abuse and anti-social behavior.

Web - https://www.habilitat.com/
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Habilitat/
Phone: 1-800-872-2525

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Find out more at http://beyondhoperadio.com

--
Show sponsors:

The Addictions Academy - The Nation’s Leading Accredited Addiction Treatment Services, Recovery/Sober Coaching & Intervention Training Academy: https://theaddictionsacademy.com/

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/

Happy New Year! We made it to 2018 and I am so excited about this year.

A lot of growing pains and lessons that needed to be learned. And of course that's going to continue but I feel like I have made some genuine progress. And I'm excited about that. This podcast by far has been the scariest and most empowering thing that I've ever done.

Sometimes stop and pinch myself, to sit with it and recognize that I'm doing this. I am sharing my voice and talking about things that are scary and uncomfortable and that's okay and that's good. Learning to share my voice has been the most important thing that I could have ever done for myself. And I have so many people to thank that have helped me.

A couple of the things that I'm going to just keep top of mind for myself, is to continue to stand up for myself and for my family and to shine a light on difficult topics. And just continuing to remind myself not to worry what everybody else thinks about me and to stay true to my own path and my own process and how I go about getting there.

It's very personal for everyone. And to honor myself through all my growth and change and redefining what it means to feel beautiful. I'm almost 50. You know sometimes I wake up and I look in the mirror and I don't recognize myself. And as women, I think we have been defined for so long on our physical beauty. I'm challenging myself right now to take a closer look and to redefine what that means for myself.

So those are some of the things that I'm going to be working on this year. Also just allowing more freedom and blessings into my life.

And I recently started beyond Hope Foundation and I cannot wait to see what happens with that. I'm going to give that some more attention this year. And before we jump into today's show I just want to thank anybody who's out there listening to my voice right now. We're here to continue to support and love each other through this journey, so thanks for being here.

So for my last episode of the year I'm excited to just kind of pull together some of my favorite pieces from all of my interviews and kind of putting them up into one episode and I hope you enjoy.

And please, one of my hopes with this podcast is to share your voices so if you have stories of hope or questions that you would like answered or if you just want a friend you can always reach out to me. You can text me at (206) -229-0244. You can email me at [email protected] or visit my Facebook group, The Beyond Hope Radio Facebook group and I'm just sending you so much love.

Happy New Year. And I look forward to talking with you again soon.

Bye for now, Shar

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Find out more at http://beyondhoperadio.com

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Show sponsors:

Hassle-Free Books - You have a message to share, it shouldn't be so difficult to get it out to the world. Become an author in a little as 45 days: http://hasslefreebooks.com

The Addictions Academy - The Nation’s Leading Accredited Addiction Treatment Services, Recovery/Sober Coaching & Intervention Training Academy: https://theaddictionsacademy.com/

Beyond Hope with Shar Jones
https://businessinnovatorsradio.com/beyond-hope/