What happens when your emotions go underground? This episode dives into emotional shutdown, shame, and the invisible scripts that shape our lives—until we finally stop and ask, “Who the hell am I?”

Gabi Da Gama joins me to talk about growing up with repressed emotions, the midlife unraveling, and how childhood beliefs still run the show until we decide to rewrite them. We go deep on trauma (even the “small t” kind), anger, guilt, and what real relief actually looks like.

💥 In this episode:

• Emotional repression + the body

• Why midlife cracks us open

• Guilt, shame + obedience conditioning

• The shutdown of women’s anger

• Trauma with a “small t” still counts

• The shadow self + mirror people

• What actual relief feels like

This one’s for anyone who grew up being “good” and woke up tired of it.

You can find Gabi on Facebook as Gabrielle Da Gama and on instagram @Gabidagama_22 She has a downloadable Emotions Decoder Grab it here subscribepage.io/H774wB

Come debrief this episode in the Unmuted Lounge—plus find journaling salons, K-Pop catharsis, creative hangouts, and more existential detangling.

The Lounge

In this episode of Unmuted, Gillian Wray gets into the raw, relentless reality of living in a woman’s body — the shame that gets handed down, the silence we’re trained to keep, and the rage that simmers underneath it all. Through her own poetry and lived experience, Gillian digs into how these forces shape us, limit us, and how damn exhausting it is to pretend otherwise.

There’s a moment with Kate Winslet that hits harder than it should, a reflection on the myth of Medusa that’s less about monsters and more about inherited pain, and an invitation to stop playing polite with the parts of ourselves we were told to hide.

If you’ve ever felt the weight of silence, if you’re tired of shrinking, or if you just want to hear someone say the thing out loud — this one’s for you,

My Writing https://open.substack.com/pub/finitemusings/p/pandoras-box?r=1myke4&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

The Box Speaks Salon

https://lounge.thesovereignpoet.com/events/72C304

In this episode of Unmuted, I’m joined by educator, poet, and writer Saira Anwar to talk about her journey through silence, grief, and the long process of rising. Saira shares how journaling became her way out of despair and the practice that eventually revealed her voice as a poet.

We talk about:

• What it feels like to live muted — and the moment she realised she had to speak.

• How grief and silence shaped her story.

• The role of journaling in transforming pain into poetry.

• Why creative practices can open doors we didn’t know were locked.

Saira’s work invites us not just to hear her story, but to recognise our own in it.

👉 You can find Saira’s book Rising from Despair here https://sairaanwar.co.uk/

Want to try journaling in a safe supportive space?

The Decision Mirror https://lounge.thesovereignpoet.com/events/9DFFA3

The Box Speakshttps://lounge.thesovereignpoet.com/events/72C304

Places are limited to the first 20 sign ups to ensure the atmosphere stays intimate.

How many times have you silenced yourself with the phrase, “There’s no point”?

• No point speaking up because they’ll just react the same way.

• No point trying because it never changes.

• No point asking because you already know the answer.

In this episode, I dive into the quiet lie of “no point” and how it traps us in survival mode instead of true safety. I share how this showed up in my own marriage, how it seeps into our creativity, and why the world needs your voice—even when it feels like no one is listening.

We’ll explore:

✨ The cycle of “no point / no choice” that keeps women muted.

✨ The truth about survival vs. safety.

✨ The Wheel of Voice—and how to start turning it again.

Because there is a point. There’s always a point. And it’s this: the world needs your creativity, your fire, your voice.

Resources & Links:

🎙 Your invitation to the Unmuted Lounge: https://lounge.thesovereignpoet.com/invitation?code=9825JJ

💌 Join the newsletter for more: subscribepage.io/unmuted

What happens when we stop silencing ourselves and start singing anyway?
In this conversation, choir leader and voice coach Katie Rose joins me to talk about the many ways we lose – and reclaim – our voices. We explore:

• How choirs create connection, healing, and courage

• What it means to “howl” when words aren’t enough

• The lineage of voice through mothers, daughters, and communities

• Why reclaiming voice is both personal and political

Katie shares stories from her work and her own journey with music and silence, reminding us that voice is not just about performance, it’s about presence.

This is a conversation for anyone who has ever swallowed their words and longed to be heard.

Find Katie at https://therosewindow.org/

Join us both in the Unmuted Lounge and continue the conversation

https://lounge.thesovereignpoet.com/invitation?code=9825JJ

Learning in the Margins
My mum is whip-smart, creative, and relentless — and still says she’s “not clever like you or your brother.” The system told her that, and over time, she believed it.

This episode is about the kind of deep, unrecognised learning that happens outside the classroom — the skills, wisdom, and grit you gain without a certificate, and why they matter. We’ll talk about emotional labour, the hidden curriculum, and why sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is speak before you feel ready.

If you’ve ever been told you’re “just” something, or felt you had to wait for permission to be taken seriously, this conversation is for you. And if you’re looking for a place to share your voice and your skills without permission slips or gold stars, you’ll hear how to join me in The Unmuted Lounge.

https://lounge.thesovereignpoet.com/invitation?code=9825JJ

What gets recorded, and what gets erased?
Who holds the pen, and who gets buried beneath the edits?

In this fiercely intelligent and deeply human conversation, poet and historian Carol J. Forrester joins me to talk about the silencing of women in official records—and the radical act of writing them back in. We talk about poetry, research, mythology, grief, running, and how history is not a fixed truth but a live wire.

This one goes deep, fast.

• A poet-historian who writes with both fire and footnotes

• The cost of erasing women—and the power of reimagining them

• A run through the woods that turns into a reckoning

• Why rage belongs in poetry—and how silence is shaped by safety

• The story behind Stonetongued, and the truths it tells

📚 Carol’s work:
Browse her poetry, book tour, and Substack via her Linktree
Her latest collection: Stonetongued

📖 Join The Oak Path
A 10-week journey to reclaim your creative voice. Waitlist now open: https://poetry.systeme.io/waitlist

🗣 Like this episode?
Share it. Rate it. Whisper it into the ear of someone who forgot they were allowed to speak.

What you’ll hear:

What stops us from talking about money?
Where did we learn to shrink, to go silent, to feel ashamed of wanting more?

In this episode, I speak with Jessica from Definance — a financial coach who’s helping women rewrite their money stories.
We talk about shame, silence, and the systems that taught us money was complicated — or dangerous — or not for us at all.

We also talk about possibility.
Because power doesn’t have to look how we were told it should.

Jessica is running Ignite: seven bold steps to reset your money story.

Subscribe to Unmuted wherever you listen, and join us weekly as we reclaim the truths we were trained to hide.

This week on Unmuted: Speak the Truth They Trained You to Hide, I talk with Dianne Casey—a poet, performer, and all-round powerhouse—about what it really takes to reclaim your voice when the world has taught you to stay quiet.

We dive into the magic of spoken word, the strength of building community, and the courage it takes to speak before you're ready. Dianne doesn’t just talk about transformation—she embodies it. She shares pieces about silence and voice including a piece from her upcoming debut collection, The Ritual of Not Disappearing.

This episode is about taking up space, honouring your own voice, and speaking not just for yourself, but for everyone who’s still trying to find theirs.

Read more of Dianne's poetry on Substack https://diannecasey1.substack.com

This one’s for the women who don’t press the call button even when they think they might be dying. The ones who’ve been told they're too much for having feelings and not enough for needing help. The ones who apologise for crying, for asking questions, for needing an extra pillow in a hospital bed. If that’s you—welcome. This is your episode.

In this first solo episode of Unmuted, I talk about being the quiet girl. The compliant girl. The “good girl” who internalised so many rules about what not to say, she forgot how to say anything at all. I unpack the ridiculous expectations of being pleasant, low-maintenance, and quiet—even when everything inside you is screaming.

This is a messy, honest ramble about what happens when you stop swallowing your voice and start using it. I talk about learning to advocate for myself, discovering expression through poetry, and why I started this podcast—not because I love the sound of my voice, but because I’m finally ready to use it without shame.

If you’ve ever been told you were dramatic for telling the truth, or if you’ve ever tried to be so “easy to handle” you disappeared entirely, this one’s for you. No more shrinking. No more softening the edges.