Valerie Tocci, Partner at Fox Rothschild LLP, could have stayed in the courtroom chasing high-stakes cases as a federal prosecutor. Instead, she walked into family law and never looked back.

Eighteen years later, she's still fired up about it, and in this episode she's honest about why. She talks about the anger that still rises when she sees injustice, and why she thinks a good lawyer should feel it rather than bury it. She opens up about being a working mother of two, and how raising her own daughters quietly changed the advice she gives divorcing parents. And she shares the simple exercise she gives clients who can't picture life on the other side of a divorce, the one she promises will leave them happier.

Along the way: the New Yorker who's never had a driver's license, the childhood dream she still hasn't ruled out, and the honest answer she gives young lawyers who ask if this work is worth it.

Host Denisa Tova goes past the resume to the person underneath. Come for the career, stay for the honesty. This is one of those conversations that sneaks up on you.

Follow Beyond Your Bar for new episodes featuring voices across law, entertainment, and beyond.

Learn more about Valerie:https://www.foxrothschild.com/valerie-h-tocci

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: https://beyondyourbarpodcast.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/denisatova

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Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

Barrett Doss played Victoria Hughes on Station 19 for seven seasons. Before that she was a leading lady on Broadway, starring as Rita in Groundhog Day opposite Andy Karl and winning the Theatre World Award for her debut. Right now you can find her as Emily Henderson in Netflix's remake of Little House on the Prairie.

She has her own rule for the industry: don't work for the business, make the business work for you. She explains what that means for anyone trying to break in without losing themselves along the way.

We get into growing up with two attorneys as parents and a mom who was a professional athlete before law school, understudying three roles at once and performing with James Earl Jones at 25, the controversial off-Broadway play where they counted how many people walked out each night, navigating identity as a biracial actress in an industry that loves to put people in boxes, and how one audition after Groundhog Day closed changed her entire life.

Follow Barrett Doss: instagram.com/dontgo_jasonwaterfalls

Subscribe for new episodes every week. Until next time, stay curious and inspired.

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondyourbarpodcast.com

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Facebook: facebook.com/denisatova

Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

Heidi Harris, Partner at Mosberg Sharma Stambleck Gross LLP, has spent more than 30 years as a divorce attorney in New York City. Then she went through her own, after 25 years of marriage. What happened next is the part most people don't expect: the anger eventually subsided, and today she and her ex-husband are genuinely friends who travel together as a family for their kids.

Heidi opens up about the daughter of a Polish immigrant builder who became a lawyer to honor her father, why she refused to litigate her own divorce, and the "long game" philosophy she brings to every client: think about the life you want after this is over, not the motion you can win today. She's honest about therapy, co-parenting without dragging kids into the middle, learning to enjoy her own company, and why "fair" is a concept she never promises anyone.

A warm, refreshingly direct conversation about resilience, reinvention, and starting the next chapter as unscathed as possible.

Follow Beyond Your Bar Podcast for new episodes featuring voices across law, entertainment, and beyond.Learn more about Heidi: www.mssglaw.com/bio/heidi-harris

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondyourbarpodcast.com

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/denisatova

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Instagram: www.instagram.com/denisatova

Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

For Molly Zamoiski, family law wasn't a winding path. It was in her blood. Her mother ran a nursery school, and her father, who passed away before she was born, was an attorney. She grew up drawn to law and to helping children, built her entire career at one firm, and became a matrimonial attorney who genuinely loves the work.

Denisa Tova gets to know the person behind the title. Molly talks about why she'd rather settle a case than hand a family's fate to "a stranger in black robes," how she keeps her cool with difficult opposing counsel, and why the clients hunting for the "sharkiest of shark attorneys" usually just spend more money without getting anywhere. She also opens up about meeting her husband at a nearly empty pre-law-school happy hour, raising two little negotiators, her love of travel and Thailand, and the party-planner she'd be if she weren't a lawyer.

A warm, honest conversation about knowing exactly who you are and doing the work with intention.

Follow Beyond Your Bar Podcast for new episodes featuring voices across law, entertainment, and beyond.

Connect with Molly: https://cmfb.com/attorneys/molly-zamoiski/

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondyourbarpodcast.com

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/denisatova

Facebook: www.facebook.com/denisatova

Instagram: www.instagram.com/denisatova/

Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

Victoria Rowell was a foster child on a farm in Maine who taught herself ballet from a book. That turned into a scholarship to the American Ballet Theater, and eventually into one of the most recognizable careers in television. Drucilla Winters on The Young and the Restless, eight seasons on Diagnosis Murder with Dick Van Dyke, and Dumb and Dumber opposite Jim Carrey.

She has her own rule for making it through: the alternative was never an option. She explains what that meant for a 17 year old living alone in New York City, hiding her foster care status from everyone around her, and being the only person of color in the room.

We get into the women who raised her and why some people are meant to have many mothers, what Jim Carrey is actually like when the cameras roll, the movie she is determined to make about her life and who she wants to play her, why she started writing and directing her own material when the right doors would not open, and what has gotten better as she has gotten older.

Learn more about Victoria:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/victoriarowell/?hl=en

The Women Who Raised Me: https://a.co/d/0a1vyTt7

Subscribe for new episodes every week.

Until next time, stay curious and inspired.

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondyourbarpodcast.com

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/denisatova

Facebook: www.facebook.com/denisatova

Instagram: www.instagram.com/denisatova/

Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

Gregory Gilston built a family law firm from scratch in the middle of the pandemic and ran the whole thing on technology from day one. That turned into a second company, TekStak Legal Consulting, where he helps other attorneys do the same.

He has his own rule for family law: it takes four to tango. Both attorneys and both parties. He explains what that means for anyone stuck in a case that will not move.

We get into the tech most firms pay for and never use, why a firm without a tech stack is worth almost nothing when it is time to sell, what he calls litigation land and how people end up there, the book he is co-writing on the hidden toll of family court, and the children's book he wrote for his daughter about a dolphin who plays golf.

Gregory Gilston: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gregory-gilston-56a90640

Gilston Legal: https://www.linkedin.com/company/gilston-legal/

TekStak Legal Consulting: https://www.linkedin.com/company/tekstak-legal-consulting/

Subscribe for new episodes every week.

Until next time, stay curious and inspired.

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondthebarpodcast.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/denisatova/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/denisatova

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/denisatova

Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

Sally Miller spent 30 years designing clothes for women. She built her own fashion brand from scratch on credit cards after a shocking divorce. She dressed the Obamas. And then in 2020 everything stopped and she had to face the question she had been avoiding her whole life. Who am I without all of this?

So she sold her house, gave her kids 90 days to move out and drove across the country alone for five months to find out.

Sally talks about the darkest year of her life in 2023 when she almost scrapped her book entirely, what her mentor told her about taking the oars out of the water and why it changed everything, why she believes confidence literally means trust and what happens when we stop trusting ourselves, how she went from almost becoming an accountant to Rhode Island School of Design to dressing the First Family, and why she believes we are not broken problems to be solved but people who simply stopped trusting ourselves and need to return.

If you have ever felt lost in the identity you built or wondered who you are underneath all of it this conversation is for you.

🔔 Subscribe to Beyond the Bar Podcast for weekly conversations that go beyond the title and into the real story.

📲 Follow Sally Miller: sallymiller.com

📖 Trust Yourself Anyway — sallymiller.com/book

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondthebarpodcast.comLinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/denisatova

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Instagram: www.instagram.com/denisatovaPodcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

Nobody plans for the thing that changes everything.

Jerry Scharoff of The Law Office of Jerome A. Scharoff, P.C. didn't set out to be a divorce lawyer. A single case landed on his desk, he wrote one memo on a weekend, and 30 years later, here he is. That's how careers actually happen. Not in a straight line, but in moments you don't recognize as turning points until you look back.

Jerry opens up about growing up in a family of lawyers and losing his father during law school, and what "why me, why not you" taught him about pushing through. He shares how going through his own divorce changed the way he sits with clients, why the way you treat a parking attendant tells you everything, and the hard truth that running a firm is a completely different skill than practicing law. And when the work is done, it's his kids, Springsteen, and the Islanders that bring him back to himself.

The through line is simple. Be true to yourself, work hard, treat people well. Simple to say, hard to live.If you've ever ended up somewhere you didn't plan and wondered if you're on the right path, this one's for you.Follow Beyond the Bar Podcast for new episodes featuring voices across law, entertainment, and beyond.

Connect with Jerry: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jerome-a-scharoff-34b7924/

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondthebarpodcast.com

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/denisatova

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Instagram: www.instagram.com/denisatova/

Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

Sean Stone grew up on some of the most iconic film sets in Hollywood. Wall Street. The Doors. Born on the Fourth of July. His father is Oliver Stone. And somehow none of that is the most interesting thing about him.

Sean talks about traveling the world from the age of five, spending a semester shadowing his father on the set of Alexander instead of going to class, and what happened when he broke into the Greystone Asylum on October 13th and heard footsteps in an empty building.

He also gets into his new book "10 Things to Learn: Ancient Wisdom for the Modern Soul," why he believes we are all here to fall, surrender, cry, care, hate, create, share, love, breathe and laugh, what three days alone in complete darkness in a cave taught him, and why when Denisa asked what he is protecting most these days his answer was simply trust and surrender.

You won't want to miss it!

🔔 Subscribe to Beyond the Bar Podcast for weekly conversations that go beyond the title and into the real story.

📲 Follow Sean Stone: seanstone.info

📖 Pre-order 10 Things to Learn on Amazon: https://a.co/d/07OVDdWL

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondthebarpodcast.com

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Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.

Joseph H. Nivin built his matrimonial law firm from the ground up in Forest Hills, New York. But what he brings to the work goes well beyond the courtroom. As someone who has been through divorce himself, he understands on a personal level exactly how much is at stake for the people sitting across from him.In this episode, Denisa Tova gets the story behind the title: the short-story-writing kid who picked dandelions on the soccer field, the post-9/11 economy that nudged him toward law school, and the baseball players who shaped how he handles failure. Joe opens up about raising his son to value fit over prestige, why he needs to see the impact of his work to love it, and yes, the great guinea pig rescue of a record-setting snowstorm.A conversation about accountability, resilience, and doing the work even when the day went sideways.Follow Beyond the Bar Podcast for new episodes featuring voices across law, entertainment, and beyond.

Learn more about Joseph Nivin: www.nivinlaw.com/attorney/nivin-joseph-esq

Watch more episodes and connect with Denisa here: beyondthebarpodcast.com

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/denisatova

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Instagram: www.instagram.com/denisatova/

Podcast Production by HypeCats.com, webinars, and podcasts: hypecats.com.