Sometimes our most profound business lessons come disguised as an impulse buy and a garage full of inventory.

During the height of COVID lockdowns, while juggling a full-time remote mining job, finishing a degree, and managing investment properties, I decided to go all-in on starting an online crystal shop. What started as a fun idea quickly spiraled into a manic road trip to Vancouver where I dropped $10,000 on wholesale rocks and nearly bought a $13,000 vintage camper on the drive back.

The rest? I had to figure out the hard way.

Building the business was chaotic, and after spending $25,000 on inventory, equipment, and subscriptions, I hit a wall. I was ungrounded, getting lost in the spiritual space I was diving into, and ultimately realized I simply didn't have the capacity to properly run the company. Shutting Mystic Moon Gallery down after just nine months felt like stalling out, but looking back? It was exactly the lesson I needed. Because here is the truth: your first attempt isn't a failure, it is the path to success. You have to give yourself the grace to stumble a few times before you truly understand the arena you're playing in.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

The Manic Business Launch: How the isolation of the pandemic fueled an impulsive $25,000 deep-dive into starting a business.

The Need for Grounding: Why getting too lost in meditation and the spiritual realm led to a crucial realization about staying rooted in the present.

Permission to Fail: Why stumbling on your first try is a completely normal part of the journey, and why just starting at all should be celebrated.

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"I'll never marry a waitress."

That's what my boyfriend of several years said to me one night when I asked him where our relationship was going. I was making $90,000 a year serving tables at the Monkey Tree in Yellowknife. He was a drug dealer. And somehow I walked away from that conversation questioning my life choices.

That one comment cost me $140,000.

Not directly. But it started something — a technical diploma from Aurora College, a Bachelor of Science from Royal Roads, an executive MBA from Queen's, and about two decades of tuition payments in between. There were points along that road where I went from six figures to nothing, living on debt, genuinely wondering what I was doing.

So was it worth it? I've thought about it a lot. And the answer has almost nothing to do with what I learned in a classroom.

In this episode:

• The remark that sent me back to school at an age when I'd already written school off — and how "prioritizing the relationship" quietly shaped every academic decision I made for years.
• A hiring freeze, a layoff, a job at half my old salary, a year studying psychology and art in Nanaimo, and going broke. The path was not a line.
• Why I chose the MBA that cost twice as much as the others — on purpose — and what my employer said when I asked them to help pay for it.

Universities teach you the theory. Life teaches you what it actually is. But the thing I really paid $140,000 for wasn't on any syllabus.

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Sometimes I stumble on stories that are incredibly difficult to put into words... but I think I finally figured out how to say this one.

At 27, my entire world was going through a massive transition. I was dealing with a layoff, starting a new job, navigating toxic relationships, and then... I got sicker than I had ever been in my life. I sat in an ER for two hours convinced I was dying, only to have a smug nurse brush it off as just "the flu." What followed was years of severe exhaustion, unexplained weight gain, and being freezing cold all the time.

The rest? I never saw coming.

It was my ultimate lesson in medical self-advocacy. Being dismissed by the healthcare system felt incredibly frustrating at the time, but looking back? It was the catalyst that forced me to take control of my health. Because here is the truth: doctors are brilliant advisors, but they are not the ultimate authority on your body. You are.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• The Silent Symptoms: How to recognize the subtle, creeping signs of a thyroid disorder, from weight gain to daily exhaustion.
• The Diamond Disaster: The terrifying amnesia-like symptoms I experienced when I tried to double my thyroid medication out of pure frustration.
• Becoming Your Own Authority: How to effectively partner with your doctor, advocate for the right blood tests, and take ownership of your health journey.

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He paid for his daughter's ice cream, then stepped aside and let me pay for my own. It took his fifteen-year-old daughter smacking him on the arm and going, "Dad. And hers." A $6 ice cream. That was the moment, and I still stayed.

I hadn't been in a relationship in twelve years when I met this guy on Bumble. He lived in the States, he was in med school, and he bailed on our very first date two hours before it happened because he'd done "too much fishing and golfing." I had already written him off. Then a voice in my head said, "But what if you like him?" So I gave him a chance. Nine months later he flew up to see me for a week, talked about our future the entire time, and dumped me twelve hours before his flight home.

Here's what I understand now that I didn't understand then: a red flag is two things at once. It's a pattern of behaviour you're recognizing because you've seen it before, and it's your soul drawing a boundary about how you're willing to be treated. When you ignore it, you don't avoid the pain. You just delay it and pay interest on it. I cried every single day for two months, and every single thing I was blindsided by, I already had the information on.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• The Date That Never Happened: How the very first red flag showed up before we ever met in person, why I talked myself out of it, and the question I asked myself that kept me in a relationship I should have walked away from on day one.
• The $6 Ice Cream: What it actually means when a man gets so comfortable with you paying for everything that he won't cover a six dollar cone, and why it took a teenager to see what I couldn't.
• The Girl on Instagram: Why every woman can scroll her partner's following list and instantly clock the one account that feels wrong, why you should never have to ask a man to unfollow anyone, and what I found out he was really doing.
• The Flight He Insisted on Paying For: The only time in nine months he refused my money, what that generosity was actually covering for, and how to spot the red flag that's hiding inside a nice gesture.
• Red Flags Are Not Drama, They're Data: The two-part framework I use now for deciding whether something is a workable issue or a dealbreaker, before it costs you a year of your life.

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Some of our best moments in life are happening and we don't even know it.

For a decade, I traded a normal routine for a two-in, two-out shift as an environmental scientist at a remote diamond mine in Canada's Arctic. It was a fly-in, fly-out operation with no roads, working 14 straight 12-hour days on the untouched tundra to ensure the mines were protecting the environment.

From tense stare-downs with massive gray wolves to the dreaded 2 A.M. "bear calls" pushing grizzlies off the active site, the job was wild, demanding, and completely unforgettable. Looking back, those were some of the most special moments of my career. Because here is the truth: the only thing that's constant in life is change, and you don't want to look back and realize you missed the best time of your life because you weren't present.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• The Fly-In, Fly-Out Reality: What it actually takes to compartmentalize your life for a grueling remote shift, and the real sacrifices it demands on your relationships and holidays.
• Wild Encounters & Bear Calls: True National Geographic moments, from being circled by curious caribou scouts to witnessing a high-stakes showdown between a grizzly bear and a protective bull muskox.
• Living in the Present: Why you have to make sure you're living in the moment, recognizing the good times, and embracing change before life passes you by.

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An old professor emailed me a job ad. I almost deleted it.

I was 35, comfortable, and not looking for anything. I had a pension, a huge mortgage on a house in Cochrane, a young dog, and a job at a diamond mine that I genuinely loved. And then a man I had never met called me from an island in the Maldives, and somewhere in the middle of that phone call I realized... I was being interviewed.

He gave me a week to decide.

So I made a deal with God. Two things had to happen or I wasn't going: someone had to rent my house, and someone had to watch my dog. I listed the place ten minutes later. It was done before the night was over.

Here is the truth I keep coming back to: fear should never be the thing that makes the decision for you. Every good opportunity is supposed to scare you a little. That fear isn't a warning, it's a sign you're about to grow. The question is never "what if it doesn't work out." The question is "what if it all works out, and I'm smart enough to handle whatever comes?"

I got six months instead of two years. COVID took the rest. I'd still say yes again tomorrow.

In this episode, you'll learn:

The Deal with God: How to know the difference between fear that's protecting you and fear that's just keeping you small, and what happens when you finally call its bluff.
Paradise Has Politics: What it's really like to be the outsider, from being deliberately left off the invite list on Christmas Eve to a linen uniform that made half the island resent me.
What If It All Works Out: Why the opportunity that scares you is usually the one you're supposed to take, even when it ends far sooner than you planned.

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Sometimes I stumble on stories that are incredibly difficult to put into words... but I think I finally figured out how to say this one.

My entire world came crashing down at once early on in my career. I walked away from a 7-year relationship, lost my dog, lost my job, and was staring down an $80,000 truck and a massive mortgage. And then... I found myself entangled in an affair with a senior executive of the company.

The rest? I never saw coming.

It was my ultimate tower moment. Being let go from my first real corporate job felt like a tragedy at the time, but looking back? It was the greatest thing that ever happened to me. Because here is the truth: no matter how good you are, you will never be valued if you are in the wrong environment. God will always remove you from places you don't belong.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Navigating the Tower Moment: How to survive when your relationship, career, and financial stability all collapse at the same time.
• The Executive Entanglement: The truth behind the affair that accelerated the collapse, and the lessons learned from it.
• Divine Removal: Recognizing when a layoff or a loss is actually God clearing the path for where you truly belong.

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You've all heard the saying "money can’t buy happiness." But let’s be honest about what it can buy: your independence.

The moment I decided to walk away from my 7-year relationship, I discovered my very first taste of true freedom: I bought my FIRST house. I stumbled into the real estate market unknowingly, but it changed my perspective on money forever and became my greatest provider to date. Money isn’t something to be feared, and it doesn't have to be viewed as a negative thing; it is a tool to be used, and it provides the ultimate freedom from control.

In this week's lesson of the "41 Lessons in 41 Years" series, I'm diving into the importance of investments and why you should aim to make enough money to afford your independence. Never keep yourself in a position of weakness or under someone else's control because of your finances. Make a plan and take action, so no one can take advantage of you or keep you in a toxic situation.

How did a heartbreak turn into my greatest asset? The story of how I got into real estate is not what you would expect…

In this episode, we cover:

• How I went from a real estate flop to tripling my money in one sale. 
• The reality of investment properties. 
• Why financial independence is your ultimate protection against toxic dynamics.
• Navigating the real estate market and turning it into a life-changing asset.

Connect With The Show:

• 🔗 Subscribe & Listen (Apple, Spotify): https://bigfeelsbaddecisions.transistor.fm
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• 📸 Instagram/Facebook: @bigfeelsbaddecisions

For years, we’ve been told that achieving your goal weight is simply a matter of discipline, grit, and matching athlete-level training with exhausting caloric deficits. But what happens when you’re trapped in a constant, draining cycle of overtraining, overeating, and relying on pure willpower just to end up maintaining the same size?

In this episode, I discuss my personal journey with a GLP-1. This isn't a conversation about dropping massive amounts of weight just for the sake of it, it’s an honest, unfiltered look at using science to rewire neural pathways, silence the relentless "food noise," and build a lifestyle where your body finally just works without the constant mental battlefield.

From navigating the initial changes of month one to unexpected food aversions and the exact wellness non-negotiables that kept me grounded, we’re diving into the realities of my GLP-1 experience.

Inside the Episode: 

• Month One Realities: Letting the body adjust to a new chemical blueprint, allowing receptors to develop, and intentionally scaling back physical activity to match a shifting caloric intake.
• The Death of Food Noise: Why silencing the mental obsession with food is the single most life-changing, liberating piece of the entire puzzle.
• Aversions vs. Intolerance: Navigating a sudden lack of appetite for greasy foods, alcohol (turning off the brain's reward center), and the loss of interest in a daily soda water with lemon.
• The Leftover Evolution: Breaking the habit of eating the same staples day after day and adapting to a rapidly changing palate.
• The Ultimate Goal: Shifting the paradigm from forcing a healthier lifestyle through exhausting drive to naturally craving one through altered brain chemistry.

My Top GLP-1 Guidelines:

• Hydration & Electrolytes: When the obsession with ice water becomes real, daily electrolytes are a non-negotiable requirement to stay balanced.
• Fiber & Gut Health: Staying regular during massive digestive shifts is critical. Raw psyllium husk works wonders for consistency, even if you have to get incredibly creative to choke it down every other day.
• Lift Weights: You must signal to your body that you intend to keep your hard-earned muscle. Do not skip the strength training.
• Prioritize Protein First: When appetite drops fast, eat your protein first. While the general rule is 1g per pound of body weight, listen to your body.

Connect with the Show:

• Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you, subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube, and leave a review :)
• Join the Conversation: Share your own experiences with lifestyle shifts, health optimization, and breaking the willpower cycle on our social channels. If you have tried GLP-1s or are starting one, let us know; we'd love to hear from you!

Episode Summary: What does it take to walk away from everything you’ve ever built? In this official premiere episode of Big Feels, Bad Decisions, we dive into Lesson #1: the terrifying, liberating reality that it is never too late to start over.

For twenty years, I climbed the ladder in environmental sciences. I stood on the northern tundra managing the environmental footprints of major diamond mines. I was single-handedly responsible for managing billions of dollars worth of diamonds. From the frozen north to the tropical shores of the Maldives, my career looked flawless on paper. But behind the glamorous title and the high-stakes responsibility was a harsh truth: I was trapped in a profoundly toxic corporate culture that was eroding my well-being.

In this episode, I’m taking you behind the curtain of that pivot. We talk about the exact moment I realized the golden handcuffs weren’t worth the cost, the terrifying leap of leaving a two-decade career behind, and what it actually looks like to dive into the unknown with both feet. If you’ve ever felt stuck, questioned your timeline, or wondered if you've invested too much time to pivot—this one is for you.

In this episode, we discuss:

• The High-Stakes Cage: What it’s really like working in environmental compliance at diamond mines and handling billions of dollars in assets.
• The Toxic Tipping Point: Recognizing when a corporate environment is costing you your health and sanity, no matter how great the paycheck or the location.
• Lesson #1: Navigating the fear of starting from scratch in your 40s and finding the courage to land on your own two feet.

Connect with the Show:

• Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with you, please leave a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify!
• Follow on Instagram: @bigfeelsbaddecisions for daily insights, behind-the-scenes footage, and upcoming lessons.
• Catch our videos on YouTube: @bigfeelsbaddecisions